Gum is a type of confectionery that is made from various natural and artificial ingredients, such as sugar, corn syrup, and flavorings. It is commonly used for chewing and freshening breath and comes in many different varieties, such as mint, fruit, and bubble gum. Chewing gum can provide a satisfying sensory experience and help to relieve stress, freshen breath, and improve oral health. However, it is important to dispose of gum properly, as it can be difficult to remove from surfaces and can cause litter in public spaces.
It is often used as a subject for humor because it can be chewed, stuck to objects, and has a tendency to lose its flavor over time. These humorous observations can be relatable and create a lighthearted moment. Additionally, the gum is often associated with the act of chewing, which can lead to silly or absurd scenarios when used as the subject of a joke.
Funny Gum Jokes
What is a flat earther’s least favorite flavor of gum?
Spheremint.
How are guns like gum?
Pull it out in class and everyone acts like you’ve been best friends since kindergarten.
Why does Han Solo like gum so much?
Because it’s chewy.
Did you hear that food scientists have finally managed to remove the mint flavor from gum?
The ex-spearmint was a complete success.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Oswald.
(Oswald Who?)
Oswald My Gum!
What’s the most popular chewing gum flavor in Belarus?
Pepperminsk.
What is an old person’s favorite flavor of gum?
Retire-Mint.
Yo mama breath smells so bad, they don’t know whether to give her gum or toilet paper.
What’s the moon’s favorite gum?
Orbit.
What do you call a train that carries gum?
A chew-chew train.
What flavor of gum does the President prefer?
Governmint.
Did you hear about the blonde who dropped her gum in the toilet?
She chewed the shit out of it.
What kind of gum do bees chew?
Bubblegum.
What did the guy at the restaurant say to the bubble gum he found stuck under the table?
“I have a bad feeling about this, Chewy.”
In a cafe, a Canadian was enjoying a coffee and croissants with butter and jam when an American visitor sat down next to him, chewing gum.
The Canadian ignored the American, who nevertheless initiated the conversation.
“You Canadians eat the whole loaf?” remarked the American, snapping his gum.
“Of course,” the Canadian said, frowning at being bothered during his breakfast.
The Americans created a massive bubble. “No, we don’t. In the United States, we only eat what is on the inside.
We collect crusts in a container, recycle them, turn them into croissants, and sell them in Canada.”
The American’s face was smirking. The Canadian remained silent.
“D’ya eat jam with your bread?” the American persisted.
“Of course,” the Canadian said, sighing.
The American answered, cracking his gum between his teeth, “No, we don’t. We eat fresh fruit for breakfast in the United States, then collect all of the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, turn them into jam, and sell it to Canada.”
“Do you have sex in the States?” inquired the Canadian.
“Of course we do,” responded the American, smiling.
“And what do you do with the condoms once you’ve used them?” the Canadian inquired, leaning in closer.
“Of course, we toss them away!”
Now it was the Canadian’s turn to smile.
“We don’t. In Canada, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum, and sell them to the United States. Why do you think it’s called Wrigley’s?”
What is the preferred chewing gum of communists?
Ho Chi MINT.
Recommended: Candy Jokes
What happens when you give a Dutchman a pack of gum?
Two-lip bubble.
Did you hear about a student who brought a slingshot to algebra class and fired gum at the professor?
It was a weapon of math disruption.
Yo mama so poor, she recycles gum.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
What kind of gum do astronauts chew?
Hubble Bubble.
What type of gum does a Buddhist prefer?
Enlightenmint!
Did you hear about the witch who ate 10 packs of gum?
She had some double bubble toilet trouble.
Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
“Cause I stepped on it.”
Why does Bill Clinton chew gum all the time?
He has an oral fixation.
What would you call a store that sold only mints and gum?
Bad Breath and Beyond.
At a bar, three snails were drinking. One of the snails sprang up to go to the store to buy chewing gum. He asked his snail pals if they wanted some gum as well. They agreed.
Three years have gone by. “He still hasn’t returned,” one of the snails said, “so we may as well drink his beer.”
Suddenly a voice from the door yelled, ”If you touch my beer, I won’t be buying you guys any chewing gum!”
Did you hear about the group of people trying to start a chewing gum recycling company?
They just need a little help getting it off the ground.
What kind of gum does Poseidon chew?
Trident.
Your mama so broke, her favorite snack is under the table gum.
What day should you chew gum?
Chewsday.
What’s a foot surgeon’s favorite gum?
Mentos.
What’s the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair?
Cancer.
Recommended: Cancer Jokes
How to get gum out of a child’s hair?
With leukemia.
What is bubble gum’s favorite way to travel?
By choo-choo train.
What is a planet’s favorite brand of chewing gum?
Orbit.
What’s a dog’s favorite flavor of gum?
Puppermint.
What kind of gum does Jesus chew?
Holy Spearmint.
What is a bodybuilder’s favorite flavor of gum?
Supplemint.
Why was the private detective obsessed with tracking litterers?
Gum shoe.
What is a caveman’s favorite flavor of gum?
Spearmint.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken.
What did the shoe say to the gum?
Stick with me, and you’ll go places.
Why were Wrigley, Doublemint, and Orbit watching CNN?
To find out the latest on gum control legislation.
What do a gun and gum share in common?
Gu.
What goes in hard and dry, but comes out soft and wet?
Gum!
Recommended: Dirty Jokes
What do whales like to chew?
Blubber gum.
Why are the streets of North Korea so clean?
Because your life is worth more than a gum wrapper!
When we were kids a piece of bubble gum used to cost a penny. Do you know what happened?
Inflation.
Have a better gum joke? Post your own gum puns in the comment section below!
