Thanksgiving for senior citizens is more than just a feast of turkey and pumpkin pie. it’s a heartwarming chance to swap stories, share laughter, and maybe remind everyone who taught them how to make gravy without lumps. Between old family recipes and gentle teasing about who’s wearing their “stretchy pants,” the day turns into a joyful mix of nostalgia and new memories that sparkle brighter than the cranberry sauce.
When the food settles and the grandkids finally stop running around, Thanksgiving jokes for seniors take the spotlight. The room fills with giggles as clever punchlines roll out like gravy on mashed potatoes. It’s the perfect moment when wisdom meets wit, and everyone realizes that laughter, not just leftovers, keeps the holiday spirit alive.
Best Thanksgiving Jokes for Elders
Do you know what old people say is the key to a happy Thanksgiving?
Turkey.
What do you call a group of old people at Thanksgiving?
A funeral.
What’s the proper way to introduce yourself to a turkey on Thanksgiving?
“Slice to meat you.”
What do you call an old turkey?
The gob-father.
What do old people win for aging gracefully on Thanksgiving?
Atrophy.
Grandfather: “What do you call a turkey on the day after Thanksgiving?”
Grandson: “What?”
Grandfather: “Lucky.”
Why was the UN concerned when a waiter dropped Thanksgiving dinner?
Because it was the fall of turkey, the ruin of grease and the breakup of china.
Thanksgiving is the day old fellas start getting in shape…
To play Santa Claus.
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What do you call all the old people who forgot to say grace on Thanksgiving?
Sinner Citizens!
An elderly couple was sitting in church on Thanksgiving Sunday, listening to the pastor give thanks for blessings big and small.
As the choir began to sing, the wife noticed a few heads turning her way. She leaned over and whispered, “I just let go of a silent Thanksgiving fart. What should I do?”
He said, “I think you should get fresh batteries for your hearing aid.”
What did Grandma say when the turkey took too long?
“I’ve waited for pension checks faster than this bird cooks!”
Why did the old turkey refuse to run away?
He said, “At my age, I’m seasoned enough for this.”
Why do old people love Thanksgiving leftovers?
Because by Friday, they’ve forgotten they already ate them once!
After church on Sunday, the pastor approaches the family and confirms their dinner the coming Friday.
After making small talk for a few minutes, the pastor turns to the couple’s 5-year-old. “Have your parents told you what they will be making for us on Friday?” The child thinks for a second and replies, “Goat.” The pastor squinted and exclaimed, “Goat?”
As the parents are speaking up to clarify, the child cuts in loudly. “Yeah, yesterday I heard Mommy tell Daddy that Friday is as good a day as any to have the old goat for dinner!”
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What do very old people smell like after Thanksgiving dinner?
Depends.
What do Canadians eat for Thanksgiving?
“Turkeh.”
Having a traditional Thanksgiving this year.
Going to invite the neighbors to dinner, murder them, and take their land.
An old couple had been married for 30 years.
And every morning for those three decades, at precisely 6:30 a.m., the man would release a horrendous fart that could gag a maggot! His wife would be awakened by said fart, and the man would laugh. Oftentimes, he would give her the ol’ “Dutch oven.” Every time, however, the disgusted wife would exclaim, “One day, you’re gonna fart your guts out!” The husband would then laugh harder and perhaps wave a little more foul air in her direction.
One day, it was Thanksgiving. The wife got up much earlier to begin food preparation for the feast. As she was removing the innards of her freshly killed turkey, she got an idea. She gathered up the fowl guts and brought them upstairs to her sleeping husband. She then deposited the entrails into the back of his jockeys, returned to her kitchen, and waited for 6:30.
When 6:30 arrived, she heard the earth-shattering flatulence all the way downstairs, followed immediately by a despairing cry. The woman giggled behind her hand.
Several minutes later, her husband came to the kitchen, white-faced and wide-eyed. He said, “All this time, you were right. I finally farted my guts out!” The wife said, “My goodness! Really?” He replied, “Yeah, but I got ’em all back in.”
Old people at weddings and Thanksgiving always poke me and say, “You’re next to get married…”
So, I started doing the same thing to them at funerals….
Two old turkeys get into a brawl on Thanksgiving Day.
They beat the stuffing out of each other.
What is a mathematician’s favorite part of a big Thanksgiving feast?
Pumpkin pi.
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An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing. Forty-five years of misery is enough.”
“Pop, what are you talking about?” the son screams.
“We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,” the old man says.
“We’re sick of each other, and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her,” and he hangs up.
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. “Like heck they’re getting divorced,” she shouts, “I’ll take care of this.”
She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at the old man, “You are NOT getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?” and hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Okay,” he says, “They’re coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own fares. Now what do we tell them for Christmas?”
Why do you see a lot more old people at church on Thanksgiving Sunday?
They’re cramming for the final.
What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to at the first Thanksgiving feast?
Plymouth Rock!
When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
In a dictionary.
A couple invited their family over for Thanksgiving night to spend the holiday and meal together.
The family gathered, but the couple’s children were late, and the mother-in-law complained aloud, “Ugh, your children, always late.”
Eventually, everyone sat down to eat. The mother-in-law insisted on sitting at the head of the table, no one had the strength to argue with her. After a few minutes, the hungry mother-in-law began to complain, “What’s with the food here? Why is it always late?”
A short time later, the couple brought out the meal they had prepared for their family, mostly cooked by the wife. Everyone loaded their plates with food, and the evening continued. While they were in the middle of their main course, the mother-in-law said, “I’d better start clearing the dishes so we can at least move on to the last dish on time.”
A mere second after she got up, the large wall clock hanging over the head of the table fell down, shattering her chair to pieces and almost hitting her. Everyone was in shock until the bride mumbled to herself, “This clock… always late.”
Old people will tell you that there’s no place like home…
Until you try to put them into one after Thanksgiving.
Where do turkeys go when they die?
The gravey-yard.
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Who is never hungry on Thanksgiving?
The turkey because he’s already stuffed!
An old lady was picking through the frozen turkeys, but she couldn’t find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?”
The stock boy replied, “No ma’am, they’re dead.”
What do kids yell at old people who are just trying to play on Thanksgiving?
“Get off my LAN!”
Do you have a funny Thanksgiving Joke for Senior? Write down your best jokes in the comment section below!
In light of American Thanksgiving…
I would like to thank my legs, for always supporting me; my arms, who are always by my side and lastly my fingers, because I can always count on them.