Workdays can feel like a dull loop of emails and awkward small talk, but work-appropriate Dad Jokes add some fun. They turn boring meetings and silent break rooms into mini comedy shows, without upsetting HR.
When Steve from accounting drops a dad joke, even the grumpiest co-worker smirks. Our Dad jokes for work are tiny stress-busters that make deadlines and printer jams a little less painful. They break the tension, spark conversations, and create inside jokes that make the office feel less like a workplace and more like a sitcom.
Work Appropriate Dad Jokes
Boss: “This is the third time you’ve been late for work this week. Do you know what that means?”
Me: “That it’s only Wednesday.”
Today, my boss said, “You are so talented! Why don’t you work on my team?”
Flattered but annoyed, I replied, “I’m already on your team, boss!”
Boss said, “I know that, dumbass. I’m asking, WHY DON’T YOU WORK?”
Boss: “How good are you at PowerPoint?”
Me: “I Excel at it.”
Boss: “Was that a Microsoft Office pun?”
Me: “Word”.
Boss, “I find it highly suspicious that you are only sick on weekdays.”
Employee, “It must be my weekend immune system.”
Boss texted me, “Hey, send me one of your dad jokes.”
I replied, “I’m working at the moment, I’ll send you one later.”
He replied, “Ha, that was hilarious. Send me another one.”
My boss said to me, “You are the worst train operator ever. How many trains have you derailed in the past year?”
I said, “I’m not sure. It’s so hard to keep track.”
Yo mama so short, she drives a hot wheels to work.
I told my boss, “Sorry, I’m late. I was having computer issues.”
Boss: “Hard drive?”
Me: “No, the commute was fine. It’s my laptop.”
This man called work this morning and whispered, “Sorry, boss, I can’t come in today. I have a wee cough.”
The boss exclaimed, “You have a wee cough!?”
He said, “Really?! Thanks, boss, see you next week!”
Me: “Sorry, I’m late. I broke down on the way to work.”
Boss: “Is your car with the mechanic?”
Me: “Car?”
My boss hates it when I shorten his name to D*ck.
Especially because his name’s Steve.
Recommended: HR Jokes
Told my boss 3 companies are after me so I need a pay rise. He asked me which 3 companies they were.
“Gas, electric & water,” I replied.
What do you call the boss at Old McDonald’s Farm?
The CIEIO.
The boss told me that as a security guard, it’s my job to watch the office.
I’m on season six, don’t know what it has to do with security though.
My boss is threatening to fire the employee with the worst posture.
I have a hunch it might be me.
A man says to his boss, “Can we talk? I have a problem.”
The boss exclaims, “Problem? There is no such thing. We call it an opportunity!”
The man says, “Okay then. I have a serious drinking opportunity.”
My boss calls me “the computer”.
Nothing to do with intelligence, I go to sleep if left unattended for 15 minutes.
Boss: How’s that new glue?
Me: 
What did the electrician’s boss say when he came late to work?
“Wire you insulate?”
What’s one thing you shouldn’t say at your boss’s funeral?
“Who’s thinking outside the box now, Kyle?”
My boss asked if I could perform under pressure.
“No,” I said, “but I can give Bohemian Rhapsody a try.”
I quit my job after my boss started paying me in vegetables.
I could not live off of that celery.
Why did the game designer get fired from his job?
He got into a boss fight.
Yo mama so short, she went to see Santa and he told her to get back to work.
“Boss, can I have a week off around Christmas?”
Boss: “It’s May.”
“Sorry. May I have a week off around Christmas?”
Boss: “Would you be able to take a urine test tomorrow?”
Me: “Sure. Distance or accuracy?”
My boss approached me at lunch and growled, “Where the hell’ve you been? I’ve been trying to find you all morning!”
I shrugged and said, “Good employees are hard to find!”
I walked into my boss’s office and told him that my salary is incompatible with my skills.
He said, “I know. But I can’t let you starve to death.”
I was in a taxi today, and the driver said, “I love my job. I’m my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do.”
Then I said, “Turn left here.”
A guy is hired to paint lines on a little country road, so the boss gives him a big can of paint and a brush and sends him out.
At the end of the day, when he comes to get paid, he tells the boss he got two miles done.
The boss is pretty impressed.
At the end of the second day, the painter reports that he did half a mile.
The boss is a little surprised at the drop, but thinks maybe the first-day enthusiasm just wore off.
At the end of the third day, the painter reports that he did 400 yards.
The boss says, “That’s quite a difference from the first day.”
The painter replies, “Yeah, well it’s, a lot longer walk back to the paint can now.”
My boss asked me to make a business presentation and said I should start it with a joke…
So, I put my pay slip on the first slide.
My boss said my math skills are average.
That’s just mean.
What do you say to your boss when you quit your job at Intel?
“You can circuit!”
My old boss wasn’t very good, but he did always make sure to keep the sun out of my eyes.
He was a super visor.
After a long argument with my boss, I quit my job at the helium factory.
I refuse to be spoken to in that tone of voice.
I got fired from my job at the keyboard factory the other day.
My bosses said I wasn’t putting in enough shifts.
My boss called me on my day off and asked me to come in because they were short staffed…
I said, “Hire taller people,” and hung up.
Guy 1: “If my boss doesn’t take back what he said to me, I’m leaving the company.”
Guy 2: “What did he say?”
Guy 1: “Leave the company.”
Why did the employee’s paychecks smell like parsley?
Their boss had garnished their wages.
I showed up to work and my boss told me I should have been at work at 8.
I asked him, “Why? What happened at 8?”
My boss said I’m the most counterproductive employee here.
I’m really doing well at the countertop factory.
My boss told me to wear rubber gloves while dealing with customers this week. I told him “F*ck that.”
I’m doing these prostate exams my way.
My boss fired me for cracking to many Asian jokes.
It ended my Korea.
My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.
How long have you been working here young man?
Ever since I heard the boss coming up the stairs…
In an interview, the boss asked me, “Do you have any experience?”
I told him, “Yes, this is my 20th interview”.
Sales are down, so my boss asked why the greeting cards aren’t moving.
I told him it’s because they are stationary.
At the office barbecue, I grilled some rare steak for our boss, and he said, “I like it well done.”
I said, “Thanks. That means a lot.”
After just one week, my boss at the yogurt factory said I’m probably not a good fit.
Apparently, they don’t want new hires blending into the company’s culture.
Why do cats make great bosses?
Because they have good littership skills.
My boss at the trampoline factory fired me today.
So I flipped out.
A few weeks ago, I started using goat analogies when speaking to work colleagues. My boss doesn’t seem to like it.
We’ve been butting heads ever since.
I accidentally dropped a bucket of paint on my boss at the job site.
Boy was he blue in the face!
Recommended: Unemployment Jokes
Boss: “We’re doing random drug tests today.”
Me: “That’s fine … but I won’t smoke crack.”
My boss told me to attach two pieces of wood together.
I totally nailed it!
What did the boss of the unfinished pottery store tell their employee?
“You’re fired!”
Our boss told us to act as rebels and to defy authority.
I didn’t obey him.
What did the grave digger say when his boss asked him how he liked his job?
“I dig it!”
How can you prove that your boss is stupid?
He hired me.
My boss accused me of never taking him seriously.
“I don’t agree with that,” I told him.
He said, “Can I see you in my office?”
I said, “Depends if the lights are on.”
When is the best time to have a one-to-one meeting with your boss?
12:59.
Recommended: Layoff Jokes
My boss wasn’t happy when I called in sick.
I told him I was sick of working.
I called my boss and asked if I could come in a little late.
He said, “Dream on”.
I think that was really nice of him!
Boss: Do you know our company motto?
New Hire: Sure. It’s “Push”. I saw it on the door as I came in.
Do you have a funny Dad Joke for Work? Write down your best ones in the comment section below!
