Corn has always been more than just a vegetable on the dinner table. Standing tall in golden fields, it waves in the breeze like it’s trying to say hello. People grow it, roast it, pop it, and even turn it into syrup, proving that corn somehow sneaks its way into almost everything.
Corn jokes grow just as fast as the crop itself, spreading laughter the way kernels pop in a hot pan. Farmers, kids, and even teachers can’t resist making fun out of those yellow rows. It’s like corn has a secret mission: to feed stomachs first, and then tickle funny bones.
Best Corn Jokes
What do baby corns call their daddy?
Popcorn.
How does KFC get its corn on the cob so smooth?
They use a kernel sander.
How much does corn cost a pirate?
Maybe a buck an ear.
Why is it risky to tell secrets on a farm?
The corn have ears, the potatoes have eyes and the beanstalk.
What’s the best thing about corn?
It’s the only food that if you really wanted to you could eat twice.
What the corniest part of a corn field?
The corner.
What sounds exactly like a corn but it’s not corn?
Acorn.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Corn.
(Corn who?)
Cornfused about why I’ve got an ear for jokes!
What is Mike Tyson’s favorite food?
Corn. He can eat a whole ear.
What do you call a man that sells fake corn?
Cornman.
Did you know there’s an app for corn growers?
It’s made in Sili-corn Valley.
Recommended: Pumpkin Jokes
Yo mama so bucktooth, she can eat corn through a picket fence.
What do you call a dog that’s also vegan?
CornDog.
What do you call buying a huge amount of corn at once?
Stalk investment.
What’s corn’s least favorite movie?
Children of the Corn!
Why did the restaurant stop serving corn?
Because it was out of stalk.
Two high school graduates are discussing their future college plans. The first says, “I’m planning on going into farming, it’s what my father did, and it makes good money.” The second asks, “What type of farming? Wheat, corn, livestock?”
“I don’t know, man, there are so many fields to choose from.”
What is corn’s favorite holiday?
New Ear’s Day!
Who is popcorn’s favorite character?
Mary Poppins.
Recommended: Gourd Jokes
Feed a man corn and he will eat for a day.
Teach a man to grow corn, he will kill your people and steal your land.
You know what they say about telling secrets in a corn maze…
It’s really best not to… after all, the walls have ears.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Kernel.
(Kernel who?)
Kernel you hear me? This joke is poppin’!
What do you call the traditions of cooked corn?
Pop culture.
How does corn get on the internet?
With a corn-nection!
Yo mama so fat, she doesn’t have corn rows, she has crop circles.
Sitting with my shoes off next to a warm campfire, eating corn chips.
Tostitos.
A carrot, some corn and a cucumber fell into the ocean.
They are all c foods.
How much does Tom Brady charge for corn?
75¢. It’s a Buccaneer but you get a Quarterback.
Recommended: Halloween Dad Jokes
What did the corn farmer say to his therapist?
An ear full.
A farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon load of corn.
The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise and yelled over to the boy, “Hey Willis forget your troubles. Come in and visit with us. I’ll help you get the wagon up later.”
“That’s mighty nice of you,” Willis answered, “but I don’t think Pa would like me to.”
“Aw come on boy,” the farmer insisted.
“Well, okay,” the boy finally agreed, and added, “but Pa won’t like it.”
After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. “I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset.”
“Don’t be foolish!” the neighbor said with a smile. “By the way, where is he?”
“Under the wagon.”
A cob of corn finishes his service in the army and retires.
As a Colonel in good standing among his field.
A corn farmer asked his field, “Are you listening?”
To which the field responded, “I’m all ears.”
What do you call a corn cob with only one kernel?
A unicorn.
What do you tell a vegetable after it graduates from College?
Corn-gratulations.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Shucks.
(Shucks who?)
Shucks, you didn’t like my corny joke?!
Do you guys know any good corn jokes?
Come on, I’m all ears.
Why wouldn’t Dolores let William eat the corn?
Because the maize isn’t meant for him.
Recommended: Thanksgiving Dad Jokes
How much does a corn flake weigh?
1 Kelloggram.
Why is corn popular around Halloween?
Because it’s so earie.
Why didn’t anyone laugh at the gardener’s jokes?
Because they were too corny!
A guy walks into a bar during the town’s annual Halloween celebration.
“I’d sure like to try out that giant corn maze they set up, but I’m afraid I’d get lost and kill half the day in there,” the guy tells the bartender.
“There is actually a guide you can hire that will take you through the entire labyrinth in just 60 seconds,” the bartender reassures him. “It’s a minute tour.”
I was going to tell a joke about a corn eyeball…
But it just keeps getting cornea and cornea.
Did you hear about the Russian plane that had to land in the middle of a corn crop?
Don’t worry, that pilot is the best in the field.
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
Because he was always outstanding in his field… but definitely in the wrong place at the wrong time when the corn started talking!
Dad fertilized the garden with corn starch.
The plot thickens.
What vegetable is the best singer?
Corn, because it’s always in hominy.
Recommended: Cranberry Jokes
One day two corn cobs, who were best friends, were walking together down the street.
They stepped off the curb and a speeding car came around the corner and ran one of them over.
The uninjured corn cob called 911 and helped his injured friend as best he was able. The injured corn cob was taken to emergency at the hospital and rushed into surgery. After a long and agonizing wait, the doctor finally appeared. He told the uninjured corn cob, “I have good news, and I have bad news. The good news is that your friend is going to pull through.”
“The bad news is that he’s going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life”.
Did you hear about the corn that got promoted?
He got bumped from lieutenant to kernel.
What do you call angry corn?
Ear-itated.
What do you call a potato and an ear of corn driving a police car?
Starchy and Husk.
What did Pennywise eat when he went vegetarian?
Children of the corn.
A man was in a psych ward for thinking he was a piece of corn.
He was finally cured and set free, but immediately came back to the mental hospital, trembling in fear. When asked why, he said, “There’s a chicken outside.”
Doctor explained, “But sir, you do know you’re human right? Not a piece of corn.”
Patient said, “Of course I know that! But does the chicken know?!”
Hey girl, do you live in a corn field?
Because I’m stalking you.
What happens if you castrate a corn cob?
It becomes a eunuchcorn.
Recommended: Bean Jokes
What do grouchy people eat for breakfast?
F*cking corn flakes.
What did the ear of corn say when it’s clothes fell off?
“Ah shucks!”
I tried to tell my son the joke about the donkey eating corn.
He said he didn’t want to hear another corny a$$ joke out of me.
What does a corn addict have?
Pipecorn.
A genetic botanist doesn’t show up to the church picnic.
Her concerned husband finds her in her lab working feverishly on a new pesticide-resistant strain of maize.
“Aren’t you coming to the congregation picnic?”. He asks.
“Screw them and their impossible deadlines! They told me I have until today to get the corn bred!”
What can a rooster do that a man can’t?
Pick up corn with his pecker.
Did you see the video about a magician who turned his audiences into corn?
“No? Well, prepare to be a maized!”
What movies do they show in adult theaters in Iowa?
Corn Movies.
Do you have a funny Corn Joke? Write down your best jokes in the comment section below!
I woke up this morning and my whole body had turned to corn.
If anyone has any suggestions, I’m all ears.
My son says that I make too many corny jokes.
I replied, “If you take the corn out of my jokes, you’d leave me an empty husk.”
Another corny joke ;
It’s not easy being a sensitive corn flake but corn-gratulations i just graduated from Cornell University! LOL