Fireworks light up the night sky, kids wave flags, and everyone eats way too much ice cream. The 4th of July is like a giant summer birthday party for the whole country. For kids, it’s not just about loud booms and red, white, and blue clothes, but about having fun with family and friends. After learning why this day is special, many kids start hunting for 4th of July Jokes for Kids to add even more laughs to the celebration.
Lawn chairs gathered on the grass, plates stacked with hot dogs, and kids ready to share silly lines that could make even Grandpa laugh. Nothing beats the sound of giggles mixing with firecracker pops, and these 4th of July Jokes for Kids keep everyone smiling long after the last sparkler goes out. A good laugh, after all, is the best kind of firework.
Kid-Friendly Fourth of July Jokes
Some people enjoy a day off on the 4th of July.
But not fire. Fire works.
Why were the early American settlers like ants?
Because they lived in colonies.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Yankee.
(Yankee who?)
Yankee Doodle went to town, riding on a pony!
What did the LEGO people in the LEGO City neighborhood do for the 4th of July?
They had a block party.
What protest did dogs hold in 1773?
The Boston Flea Party.
How do Pigs celebrate the 4th of July?
They hold an IN DE PEN DANCE!
What does a parrot want on the 4th of July?
A Fire Cracker.
What is the difference between George Washington and a duck?
One has his face on a bill and the other has a bill on his face.
Did you hear the joke about the Liberty Bell?
Yes, it was a crack up.
Independence Day was approaching and the teacher took the opportunity to teach her class all about patriotism.
She said to them, “You know, we live in a great country. And one of the best things about it is that we are all free.”
At this, a little boy marched up to her from the back of the class, put his hands on his hips and said angrily, “I’m not free. I’m four.”
Recommended: 4th of July Jokes
Why can’t you tell knock-knock jokes on the 4th of July?
Because FREEDOM RINGS!
Did you hear about the lost 4th of July Joke for kids?
It was a Founding Fathers joke.
What do you call a snowman on the 4th of July?
A puddle.
What is red, white, blue, and some green?
Uncle Sam who is seasick.
What kind of work do firefighters do on the Fourth of July?
Firework.
What rock group has four men but doesn’t sing?
Mount Rushmore.
Yo mama so American, the government moved the 4th of July to her birthday.
What do you call a duck on the Fourth of July?
A firequacker!
What do you call all the red, white, and blue stuff you hang around your house for the Fourth of July?
The Decorations of Independence.
Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
On the bottom.
Recommended: 4th of July Dad Jokes
Did you hear about the firecracker that wouldn’t explode on the Fourth of July?
It refused.
Which bakery should you go to on the Fourth of July?
The one that sells pastries with stars and stripes. The rest are just un-pastry-otic.
What is the Declaration of Independence for a kid?
A note excusing him from school.
Which flag is the most highly rated?
The American flag. It has 50 stars!
What do dads like to eat on the 4th of July?
Pop-sicles.
Who was the funniest person in George Washington’s army?
Laughayette.
How do dogs have a 4th of July reunion?
They go for bone-fires.
Who told the most jokes among the colonists?
Punsylvanians!
What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?
The Americans licked the British!
Recommended: 4th of July Memes
Where does a 600-pound Uncle Sam go?
On a diet, of course.
Was the Declaration of Independence written in Philadelphia?
No, it was written in ink.
What kind of tea did the American colonists want?
Liber-tea.
How do toads celebrate a hot 4th of July?
By drinking croak-o-cola.
What did the founding fathers wear to bed?
Colonial pajamas!
What is the most popular sport on the 4th of July?
Flag football.
On 4 July, what do you get when you put a photo of America in a locket?
Then it becomes in-da-pendant.
During the Fourth of July, what does the sun drink out of?
Sunglasses.
What did Luke Skywalker say on the 4th of July?
“May the 4th be with you!”
Why did the corn stalk join the 4th of July parade?
It wanted to be a-maize-ing!
Why was the math book unhappy on July 4th?
Because it had too many problems to be independent!
What’s a revolutionary’s favorite dessert?
Betsy Ross-berry pie!
On July 4th, what do you call a cat at the beach?
Sandy claws.
What does the Statue of Liberty stand for?
It can’t sit down.
Recommended: BBQ Jokes
Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?
Because the horse was too heavy to carry!
What did one American flag say to the other?
Nothing. They just waved.
Did you hear about the campers’ fireworks display?
It was in-tents!
How is a healthy person like the United States?
They both have good constitutions!
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Liberty.
(Liberty who?)
Liberty bell ringing for freedom!
On Independence Day, what does one firework say to another?
“My pop’s bigger than your pop.”
What do our flag and a sad candy cane have in common?
They’re both red, white and blue.
Do they have a 4th of July in England?
Yes. That’s how they get from the 3rd to the 5th.
Recommended: Firework Jokes
What was the most popular dance in 1776?
Indepen-dance.
Why did the firecracker go to the hair salon?
It needed to trim its bangs.
What was the craziest battle of the Revolutionary War?
The Battle of Bonkers Hill.
How do Americans spend the 4th of July weekend?
Stuck in traffic.
How do pandas stay cool on Independence Day?
They use bear conditioning.
Do you have a funny 4th of July Joke for Kids? Write down your best kid-friendly ones in the comment section below!
What quacks, has a bill and shouldn’t be trusted?
Beneduck Arnold.