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What do snowmen eat for dessert?
Ice crispies.
Ice crispies.
See lessWhat color is the sky?
Blue because if it was green, we wouldn't know where to stop mowing the lawn.
Blue because if it was green, we wouldn’t know where to stop mowing the lawn.
See lessWhy did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the shell station.
To get to the shell station.
See lessWhy is the bottom of the ocean so dark?
Because bl*ck people can't swim.
Because bl*ck people can’t swim.
See lessWhat is the Timothee Chalamet’s Hamas joke from SNL?
3 guys try saving a man from jumping from a building's window. To change his mind, they agree to listen to his music. It was a complete meltdown for them. The first guy asks the man, "Are you feeling better? You want to maybe head inside?" The man asks, "Would you share it on Instagram?" The secondRead more
3 guys try saving a man from jumping from a building’s window. To change his mind, they agree to listen to his music. It was a complete meltdown for them.
See lessThe first guy asks the man, “Are you feeling better? You want to maybe head inside?”
The man asks, “Would you share it on Instagram?”
The second one says, “If it means you won’t kill yourself then yeah!”
The third one asks, “What’s your band’s name?”
The man replies, “It’s Hey-mus. H-A-M-A-S!”
The third one shouts, “HAMAS????! Dude, I’m not sharing a song by Hamas on Instagram.”
What's the difference between a Fiddle and a Violin?
One has strings and the other has strangs.
One has strings and the other has strangs.
See lessWhat is the Grey Poupon Joke?
In the movie Wayne's World, Wayne and his companions halt at a traffic signal, and alongside them a posh car, possibly a Rolls Royce. Wayne lowers his window, seeks attention from the neighboring car's window, gesturing for the distinguished older gentleman inside to lower his window. Once their winRead more
In the movie Wayne’s World, Wayne and his companions halt at a traffic signal, and alongside them a posh car, possibly a Rolls Royce. Wayne lowers his window, seeks attention from the neighboring car’s window, gesturing for the distinguished older gentleman inside to lower his window. Once their windows are down, Wayne inquires politely, “Pardon me, sir. Do you have any grey poupon?”
See lessThe older gentleman’s reaction was like “What are you talking about?” And then it changes to, “Oh I understand go away.”
How do you keep an idiot busy for hours?
Tell them to count the grains of rice in a bag of uncooked basmati.
Tell them to count the grains of rice in a bag of uncooked basmati.
See lessWhy did the bird go to the hospital?
It needed a tweetment.
It needed a tweetment.
See lessWhat do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts!
Tweethearts!
See less