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What's a henway?
Dad: You ever heard of a henway? Me: What's a henway? Dad: About 10 pounds. Me: Very funny. Dad: But really, the best way to describe a henway is its like a greakurn. Me: What's a greakurn? Dad: About 1.50 an hour.
Dad: You ever heard of a henway?
See lessMe: What’s a henway?
Dad: About 10 pounds.
Me: Very funny.
Dad: But really, the best way to describe a henway is its like a greakurn.
Me: What’s a greakurn?
Dad: About 1.50 an hour.
What's Forrest Gump's computer password?
1forrest1.
1forrest1.
See lessWhy did the egg cross the road?
To get to the sunny side.
To get to the sunny side.
See lessWhat did the car say to the tires?
"Thanks for keeping it wheel."
“Thanks for keeping it wheel.”
See lessWhat did the socks say to the pants?
"Sup, britches?"
“Sup, britches?”
See lessWhy was the blonde snorting Sweet and Low?
She thought it was diet coke.
She thought it was diet coke.
See lessWhat is your best Hugh Janus joke?
Why did Hugh Janus never lose at hide and seek? Because nobody wanted to announce they'd found Hugh Janus!
Why did Hugh Janus never lose at hide and seek?
See lessBecause nobody wanted to announce they’d found Hugh Janus!
What is your best Joel Osteen joke?
What do you call Joel Osteen's net worth? A false profit.
What do you call Joel Osteen’s net worth?
See lessA false profit.
What is your best Elon Musk vs Mark Zuckerberg Joke?
Elon will officially be fighting Mark Zuckerberg and it will be live-streamed on 𝕏. This will be the first episode of 𝕏-Videos!
Elon will officially be fighting Mark Zuckerberg and it will be live-streamed on 𝕏. This will be the first episode of 𝕏-Videos!
See lessWhat is the talking centipede joke?
A man enters a pet store and speaks to the proprietor. "OK, I want to get a pet, but not a boring or typical pet - no cats, dogs, or birds - I want something unique." The owner of the pet business informs him that he has a talking centipede. "Really?" asked the man, "and how much?" The owner informsRead more
A man enters a pet store and speaks to the proprietor. “OK, I want to get a pet, but not a boring or typical pet – no cats, dogs, or birds – I want something unique.” The owner of the pet business informs him that he has a talking centipede. “Really?” asked the man, “and how much?” The owner informs him that the talking centipede is $50. The man accepts an unexpected offer, pays the money, and takes his new pet home.
See lessOn getting home he lays the matchbox with the centipede in it on the table, opens it, and says “Hello Mr. Centipede, Fancy going to the pub for a few drinks?” The centipede says nothing. Figuring it must be tired from the journey, he decides to leave it for an hour and try again later.
An hour later he opens the matchbox and says “Hello mr centipede, fancy going to the pub for a few drinks?” The centipede again says nothing. Starting to get suspicious the man decides he will give it one more hour, and if the centipede doesn’t talk, he will take it back to the shop for a refund.
An hour later the man opens the matchbox and says “Hello mr centipede, fancy going to the pub for a few drinks!?”
The centipede says “I heard you the first time!!! I’m putting my shoes on!”