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Why don't monsters eat ghosts?
Because they taste like sheet.
Because they taste like sheet.
See lessWhat's the Pete and Repeat joke?
You: Pete & Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out & who was left? They: Repeat. You: Ok. Pete & Repete were in a boat. Pete fell out & who was left? They: Repeat….? You: Ok. Pete & Repete were in a boat. Pete fell out & who was left?…
You: Pete & Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out & who was left?
See lessThey: Repeat.
You: Ok. Pete & Repete were in a boat. Pete fell out & who was left?
They: Repeat….?
You: Ok. Pete & Repete were in a boat. Pete fell out & who was left?…
What is your best Sofa King Jokes?
Did you hear about the man who is going to open a furniture store named Sofa King? That way he can make late-night TV commercials and shout “our prices are Sofa King low!”
Did you hear about the man who is going to open a furniture store named Sofa King?
See lessThat way he can make late-night TV commercials and shout “our prices are Sofa King low!”
What is the German word for constipation?
Farfrompoopin.
Farfrompoopin.
See lessWhat's the onion pi joke?
Friends: Enough with the math jokes, we can't understand them. Me: Well, in my 'circle', your O(pi)nions don't really add up.
Friends: Enough with the math jokes, we can’t understand them.
See lessMe: Well, in my ‘circle’, your O(pi)nions don’t really add up.
What are your best Oppenheimer jokes?
Do you know why Oppenheimer bombed in japan? They had already seen it.
Do you know why Oppenheimer bombed in japan?
See lessThey had already seen it.
What is the Barbie's Snyder Cut Joke?
When the Kens turn Barbieland into a Kendom, they essentially hypnotize the Barbies into becoming housewives. Gloria, Barbie, and others have to remind all the zoned-out Barbies that they’re actually accomplished writers and doctors, and politicians in order to overthrow the patriarchy in BarbielandRead more
When the Kens turn Barbieland into a Kendom, they essentially hypnotize the Barbies into becoming housewives. Gloria, Barbie, and others have to remind all the zoned-out Barbies that they’re actually accomplished writers and doctors, and politicians in order to overthrow the patriarchy in Barbieland. When one of the Barbies, played by Alexandra Shipp, wakes up from her daze, she says, “It’s like I’ve been in a dream where I was really invested in the Zack Snyder cut of Justice League.”
See lessWhat is the Golf ball and hose joke?
Doug was a single guy. He had a good job, he was fun to be around, and wasn't bad looking. He was in his early 30's and never married. He went through girlfriend after girlfriend and always seemed to break up with every girl at about the three week mark in the relationship. One evening Doug was at hRead more
Doug was a single guy. He had a good job, he was fun to be around, and wasn’t bad looking. He was in his early 30’s and never married. He went through girlfriend after girlfriend and always seemed to break up with every girl at about the three week mark in the relationship.
One evening Doug was at his local bar and the the bartender asks him why he breaks up with every girlfriend at the end of the third week. Doug says “well I just won’t marry a woman unless she can suck a golf ball through a garden hose. I know it’s a high standard, but I promised myself that I wouldn’t accept anything less than that one trait in a woman.”
A few years go by and a few dozen girlfriends later the bartender hasn’t seen Doug in the bar for a while. He asks around and none of the guys he hangs out with had seen him for a couple of months. Then the local doctor walks in and the bartender worried about Doug asks if he knew anything about where he was. The doctor says “Some girl sucked Doug’s testicles through his pee-hole……The wedding is set for june”.
See lessWhat does a nosey pepper do?
It gets jalapeño business!
It gets jalapeño business!
See lessWhat kind of music do cows listen to?
MOOOOOsic.
MOOOOOsic.
See less