A pilot crash lands on an uncharted island.
He awakens bound by natives and is dragged to a clearing before the tribe. Next to him is a large tree stump and an absolutely massive native.
The natives are cheering and hooting wildly, until the chieftain holds up his hand, bringing instant silence and rapt attention.
He booms out in a loud voice, “DEATH, OR OOGA-BOOGA?”
The pilot is in no hurry to die, and Ooga-booga sounds harmless enough, so he tentatively replies, “… Ooga-booga?”
The natives absolutely lose their minds, jumping around, playing a cacophony of instruments, and screaming at the top of their lungs. Their chieftain nods in approval, and gestures to the massive native standing next to the pilot.
Suddenly the pilot is seized by a group of natives and quickly tied to the trees-tump, where he is unceremoniously and viciously sodomized by the massive native, to within an inch of his life.
After the terrible ordeal, the crowd’s raving subsides, and the chieftain holds his hand again for silence.
The poor pilot can barely raise his head from the stump to look up at the chieftain, who asks:
“DEATH, OR OOGA-BOOGA?”
The pilot has had enough, robbed of his freedom, and pride, and knowing the same question will simply be asked again of him, he replies, “I choose death…”
A tense silence follows as the chieftain looks down upon him, then around at his subjects.
He rises to his feet, and raises his hands to the sky, declaring in a roaring voice:
“DEATH!!!”
“BY OOGA-BOOGA!”