Star Trek has always been more than starships and phasers. It is a universe where adults can enjoy epic space battles, deep philosophy, and plenty of over-the-top drama. But for fans who like their humor with a little mischief, there’s an entire galaxy of laughs waiting inside Star Trek Jokes.
When the serious missions take a back seat, fans boldly go into a world of playful whispers and cheeky twists. These dirty jokes bring out the grown-up side of fandom, turning captains, aliens, and starships into the punchlines of comedy that’s made to keep adults laughing at warp speed.

Adult Star Trek Jokes

What do you call a clever, socially awkward, bisexual hippie with fancy neckwear who streams Star-Trek?
A shy, wry, bi guy in a fly tie and tie dye watching sci-fi on wifi.

What do the USS Enterprise and toilet paper have in common?
They both fly around Uranus looking for Klingons.

“My friend had a disastrous date last night… apparently the guy was into giving golden showers. He was a big actor, too, one of the Star Trek guys.”
“Shatner??”
“No, I think she left before he could get to that.”

What did Spock find in Kirk’s toilet?
The Captian’s Log.

My conservative Christian parents sent me to one of those massive youth group events that celebrate how cool it is to be a virgin.
Joke’s on them, I went to the Star Trek convention next door instead.

Why does Captain Kirk only have sex with virgins?
He boldly goes where no man has gone before.

Dr McCoy on Star Trek was known to always have Erectile Dysfunction pills on him…
That’s why they called him “Bones.”

After Star Trek ToS ended, William Shatner’s career kind of stalled…
He tried his hand at a number of businesses, including a line of women’s underwear. Unfortunately, the name-brand Shatner Panties really didn’t take off.

Why did Scotty fail the multiple-choice test?
Because there was no bloody A, B, C, or D.

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I’ve decided to seek help for my crippling Star Trek-themed sex addiction since I got arrested for assaulting a Vulcan cosplayer.
I finally hit Spock bottom.

Have you heard the new Klingon army motto?
Join the Klingon army. Visit exotic planets, meet interesting people, and kill them!

Sarek and Amanda were dating,
Amanda was patiently waiting,
For signs of romance,
Soft words, a slow dance,
What she got was an efficiency rating!

Why was Captain Kirk banned from brothels around the universe?
Because one time, he took a hooker and shatner.

Whenever Weyoun meets a founder, he gets a J’em Hadardon.

Jean-Luc Picard takes Viagra.
“Captain’s log, supplemental…”

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A visiting admiral approached Chekov’s station on the ENTERPRISE.
Thinking he would test the young officer, he asked, “What would you do if the weapons officer suddenly got his head blown off?”
“Nothing, sir.” “Why nothing?”
“Because I’m the weapons officer, sir.”

What is the best Star Trek Pickup line?
“My mental pathways have become accustomed to your sensory input patterns.”

How did Stephen Hawking win the game against Einstein and Newton on Star Trek?
He had a really good poker face.

Do you have a dirty Star Trek joke? Write down your funniest adult jokes in the comment section below!