Every December, homes are invaded by a mischievous little scout sent straight from Santa’s workshop: the Elf on the Shelf. This tiny troublemaker has one job, to keep tabs on who’s been naughty or nice. But somehow always ends up in sticky situations like dangling from chandeliers or scuba diving in cereal bowls. Parents call it tradition, but we all know it’s a nightly game of “Where can I hide this elf now?” And just when you think it can’t get any more ridiculous, enter the world of Elf on the Shelf Jokes.
Our jokes take this holiday ritual to the next level, turning the elf’s antics into endless comedy gold. These jokes are the perfect side dish to your elf’s nightly escapades, giving everyone a good laugh as they spot the elf tangled in tinsel or balancing on a candy cane.
Best Elf on the Shelf Jokes
There was an accident at Santa’s workshop and a bookcase collapsed.
Now there’s a shelf on an elf.
What do you call an elf who gives up his shelf for others to sit on?
Shelfless.
What do you call a female elf?
Shelf.
What’s the Jewish version of Elf on a Shelf?
Mensch on a bench.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Candy.
(Candy who?)
Candy you see me on the shelf? I’m watching you!
Did you know that my great uncle Chuck started the elf on a shelf tradition?
Well, actually, he was a drunk on a bunk, but we toned it down for the kids.
What do you call an elf on a shelf wearing earmuffs?
Whatever the hell you want. He can’t hear you.
What do you call an elf who can’t walk?
A shelf decoration—oh, and Legoless too!
Why did the Elf on the Shelf bring a ladder to the Christmas party?
Because he wanted to get higher on the shelf!
What’s the Elf on the Shelf’s favorite game?
Hide and shelf!
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Why was the Elf on the Shelf so good at math?
Because he was great at shelving his problems!
Why did the Elf on the Shelf sit on the fireplace?
He wanted to heat things up!
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Cookie.
(Cookie who?)
Cookie you believe the Elf on the Shelf caught you sneaking a treat?
Why did the Elf on the Shelf go to therapy?
He had a lot of “elf”-doubt.
Why did the Elf on the Shelf bring a pencil to the North Pole?
Because he wanted to draw attention.
Why can’t the Elf on the Shelf ever find his way home?
Because he always gets stuck on the shelf!
How do you make the Elf on the Shelf laugh?
Tell him a shelf joke!
What does an elf on the shelf learn in preschool?
The elf-abet.
What’s every elf on the shelf’s favorite type of music?
Wrap.
What do you call an elf on the shelf with a personal trainer?
Elfy.
What kind of jokes would a depressed elf on the shelf tell?
Elf-deprecating.
What do you call an elf on the shelf that lives in New York City?
A metrognome.
What do you call a rich elf on the shelf?
Welfy.
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What do you call an elf on the shelf that goes rogue?
A rebel without a Claus.
Why can’t you borrow money from an elf on the shelf?
Because they’re always a little short.
What do you call an elf who hasn’t been out in years?
A shelfed elf.
What do you call a pre-teen elf on the shelf?
Twelvish.
To what animal does an elf need to connect to become a real creature?
To an Ant, It becomes an elphant.
Do you have a funny elf joke? Write down your best jokes in the comment section below!
