P*rnography, often just called ‘p*rn’, is a genre of media that depicts s*xual content to arouse its audience. It’s like the spicy sauce of the entertainment world, ranging from mild to wild, and available in every flavor imaginable. The fascinating thing about p*rn is its ability to cater to an incredibly diverse array of tastes and preferences – it’s the buffet that never ends. This genre isn’t just about titillation; it also reflects the vast complexity of human s*xuality. It’s a world where fantasies come to life, often accompanied by exaggerated scenarios that are as over-the-top as a soap opera set in space.
When it comes to p*rn jokes, they’re a unique brand of humor that thrives on the often ludicrous and surreal aspects of adult films. These jokes aren’t just about the act itself but revel in the absurdity of p*rn scenarios – like why the pizza delivery guy always seems to arrive at just the right moment. P*rn jokes are the cheeky whispers at a party, poking fun at the unrealistic expectations and hilariously bad acting that are the hallmarks of the genre. They remind us that while s*x can be a source of great pleasure, it can also be downright hilarious, especially when it’s dressed up in the outrageous costumes of the p*rn world.
Best P*rn Jokes
What did the wife say when she walked on her husband switching to a fishing channel from p*rn?
“You should stay on the p*rn channel as you know how to fish.”
Why are jokes in p*rn so hard to get?
They’re usually tongue in chick.
Why was the p*rnstar turned down from the job interview?
For coming half an hour early.
Why does a girl prefer Russian p*rn?
Because Russian p*rn gets them Soviet.
How is Tinder the opposite of p*rn ads?
There are actually tons of hot singles in your area, but none of them are interested in you.
After buying a p*rn DVD, why could you only see a dark image of some fat c*nt sitting there holding his c*ck?
Your telly wasn’t on.
Why did the guy suddenly stop and didn’t move during s*x?
He said that he saw that on P*rnHub, called buffering.
If half of the men watch p*rn daily then what does the other half do?
Waiting for their Internet Provider to fix the connection issues.
What’s wrong with your girlfriend being a p*rnstar?
She’s going to be really pissed when she finds out.
What happened to the guy who accidentally emailed a p*rn link to a co-worker?
Later, he emailed ten other co-workers the link and called it a virus.
How did one know that their neighbor obviously doesn’t watch any p*rn?
She asked him to come to fix her sink, he had been here for an hour and still fixing the damn sink.
What do you do with a compressed folder of p*rn?
Unzip.
How do you know men are great at multi-tasking?
Ever tried jerking off, watching p*rn, and keeping an eye on the door for intruders at the same time?!
Did you hear about the man who tried to find a p*rn director willing to hire him as a performer?
He failed. Apparently, he didn’t look hard enough.
Who is the second most p*rn-addicted person in the world?
Your FBI-Agent.
“This is so unrealistic,” the wife complained as she watched p*rn with her husband.
He replied, “Just because you’re unwilling to try new things doesn’t mean everyone else is.”
“It’s just the plumbers who come to our house have tiny d*cks,” she clarified.
Recommended: Small D*ck Jokes
Did you hear they banned all p*rn from the internet?
Don’t know what this world is cumming to.
Why are people avoiding German p*rn?
They want to train themselves to have a Hans-free org*sm.
What are p*rn stars paid?
Income.
Why did P*rnHub remove your s*x tape?
They told you to put it on Instagram Reels.
Why did the guy bury his best p*rn in a time capsule?
For the generations to come.
What’s the difference between a p*rn addict and a pickpocket?
One snatches watches.
How do you know your single friends hate online p*rn?
Every night they lay down in bed shaking their fist at it.
Pizza guy: Your total is $26.34.
Girl: I can’t afford that.
Pizza guy: Well, you’ll have to pay some other way.
Girl: [takes out wallet] Wait I forgot I had 30 dollars.
P*rn director: Cut! What the f*ck are you doing?!
What is the problem with origami p*rn channel?
Unfortunately, it’s paper view.
Why do some don’t like foot p*rn at first?
They usually get off on the wrong foot.
What is the best thing about Japanese p*rn?
They censor it so you can watch it with your family.
Did you hear about the guy who tried VR p*rn?
It’s great and immersive. Infact, he completely forgot that he was at Starbucks.
How is learning about s*x by watching p*rn similar to learning to drive by watching Fast and Furious?
It’s angrier, quicker, and has much more to do with family than real life.
How is the p*rn industry different from every other career?
It’s the only job where you have to stay late if you come early.
A father purchases a lie detector that slaps people who lie. He decided to put it to the test over dinner one night.
The father inquires of his son as to what he did that afternoon. “I just did some homework,” the son responds. The robot slaps the kid. The son then says, “All right, all right. I was watching a movie at a friend’s house.”
“What movie were you watching?” Dad inquires. “Finding Nemo,” the son responds. Again, the robot slaps the kid. “All right, all right,” he says. We had been watching p*rn.”
“What?!?” exclaimed Dad. “I had no idea what p*rn was when I was your age.” This time, the robot slaps the father.
“Wow,” Mom exclaims, laughing. He is, without a doubt, your son.”
The robot slaps the mother.
How do you end any further conversation with 90% of men who start with “You look familiar..?”
Tell them you used to do a lot of gay p*rn.
What do Disney and the p*rn industry have in common?
They both hire adults that look like teenagers.
What kind of p*rn do roosters watch?
Hen-tai.
How is working in p*rn for the free s*x similar to working at Chipotle for the free burritos?
Yeah, you’re getting paid, but it destroys your a$$h*le.
What does a p*rn star do to stay calm on set?
Pictures everyone in their underwear.
What do politicians and p*rn stars have most in common?
They’re experts at switching positions in front of the camera.
Recommended: Election Jokes
How are elections similar to watching p*rn?
The hype was fun but when it’s over people are disgusted by what they are watching.
One night, a man goes to a hotel to book a room. “Hello, I’d like a single room for the night.”
“Here’s one of our best rooms, sir. Room 13, ” says the receptionist as he hands him the key
The man goes upstairs, takes a shower, and then crawls into bed. At around 2:00 a.m., two stunning naked women enter and slip under the covers. When he realizes what is going on, he begins screwing them both. He can’t believe what’s going on.
He goes downstairs to settle the bill the next morning, still surprised by the events of the previous night. “How was your room, sir?” the receptionist inquires. “Excellent, and I will return. What am I supposed to pay you? “enquires the man. “Well. Actually, sir, we’re running a promotion. Not only are you not required to pay, but we also give you $10 as a welcome gift “says the receptionist “What?” exclaims the man, surprised. “Wow, that’s incredible.” He takes the ten-dollar bill and walks away, debating whether or not his friends will believe him.
Needless to say, he’s told all of his friends and neighbors about room 13 and the incredible night of passion after a few days. The following week, one of his friends goes to look at the room. “Please, room 13.” “Sure, sir, here’s your key.” After he goes to bed, three extremely h*rny girls get in bed at the same time, 2 o’clock, and screw his brains out. He not only does not have to pay the next morning, but he also receives $10. After a month, everyone knows about this hotel, particularly room 13. Everyone who stays in Room 13 receives the same treatment: a good screw and a ten-dollar bill. The story eventually reaches the President. The President decides to investigate the story for himself. He goes to the hotel and requests room 13. He takes the keys and heads upstairs. He goes to bed after a few drinks, waiting for the naked girls to appear. Indeed, at around 2:00 a.m., two naked ladies enter the room. They’re as h*rny and wild as everything else the President has heard. The President pulls out his p*cker and screws both of them all night. This is the most memorable night of his life.
He goes to reception the next morning, and when he asks how much the bill is, the receptionist says, “There is nothing to pay, sir. In fact, we are running an introductory offer. As a welcome gift, please accept $50.” Curious, the President approaches the receptionist and inquires, “That’s interesting. Everyone else who comes here receives a $10 reward. Why am I getting $50?”
“Well, sir,” the receptionist says. “This is the first time we’ve filmed a p*rnographic film starring the President!”
What’s the difference between a single man and a married man?
One spends his nights alone watching p*rn, being miserable. And the other one’s single.
Why some people are into inc*st p*rn?
Because taste is relative.
How do we know that P*rn stars are poorer than we think?
When is the last time you saw one able to even afford a pizza?!
What’s missing at the end of every p*rn DVDs?
Gag Reels.
What’s the difference between how daredevils and p*rn actresses become famous?
Daredevils get famous because of their cunning stunts.
A family walks into a hotel and the father goes to the front desk.
He says to the receptionist, “I hope the p*rn is disabled.”
The guy at the desk replies, “It’s just regular p*rn you sick f*ck.”
What’s a p*rn star’s favorite drink?
7up in cider.
Why is amputee not for everyone?
Because something is missing.
Recommended: No Arms And No Legs Jokes
What’s a ghost’s favorite type of p*rn?
Boookakke!
Why shouldn’t you judge someone for watching midget p*rn?
We all have our shortcomings.
What do you call those black and white movies where nobody speaks?
Interracial p*rn.
Why do Jews watch p*rn backwards?
Because their favorite part is when the hooker gives the money back.
Which day there are more searches for “stuffing” on Google than on P*rnHub?
Thanksgiving.
Friend: Why are you so sad?
Another friend: I was watching p*rn and all of a sudden my wife opened the door.
Friend: Ok I see, but is that really such a big deal?
Another friend: I mean, she opened the door in the movie.
What does the p*rn director say to wrap up a g*ngbang scene?
“It was a great shoot thank you all for coming”
What’s the most annoying thing about carpenter p*rn?
The ads about hot shingles in your area.
The boss walked straight up to his employee’s desk as he was watching p*rn and said, “Do you think I pay people to do that?”
“Probably,” the employee replied, “You’re not exactly the best-looking bloke in the world.”
Why do p*rn stars hate driving?
Because people always pull out infront of them.
What is Stephan Hawking’s favorite p*rn genre?
Ebony. The dude loves black holes.
“How can you watch p*rn but still claim you love only me?” a wife asked.
“The same way I watch Formula 1 the whole weekend but still drive my 2002 Toyota Camry every day,” replied his husband.
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What do you call a thousand terabytes of child p*rn?
A pedobyte.
How is the p*rn involving grammar teacher?
It is f*cking in tense.
How is the p*rn at a campsite?
It is f*cking in tents.
How is p*rn involved with nine other people?
It was f*cking in tens.
What’s the difference between a fitness blog and a p*rn site?
One’s all about proteins, whilst the other is more about amateur teens.
How is playing Dark Souls similar to watching p*rn?
There’s no story you just want to beat it.
What do you call a morgue that doubles as a p*rn set?
A creamatorium.
What kind of p*rn do bankers watch?
Trans action.
What do fairy tales, Disney movies, and p*rn have in common?
Unrealistic stepmother depictions.
What did Julius Caesar say after watching p*rn?
“Veni vidi veni.”
How come you never see any Albino p*rn?
Because you wouldn’t know when it was over.
The midwife asks a young lady in the maternity ward if she wants her husband to be present at her child’s birth.
“I’m afraid I’m not married,” she says. “Okay, do you have a boyfriend?” the Midwife inquires. “I don’t have a boyfriend either.”
“So, do you have a partner?” “No, I’m not married to anyone.” “I’m going to have my baby on my own.”
The midwife speaks to the young woman again after the birth. “You have a healthy, bouncing baby girl, but before you see her, I must warn you that she is black.”
“Oh, I’m very sorry,” the midwife says, “that’s really none of my business, and I’m sorry I have to ask you these awkward questions, but I also have to tell you that the baby has blonde hair.” “Well, yes,” the girl responds again, “you see, the co-star in the film was this Swedish guy.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” the midwife says again, “that’s really none of my business, and I hate to pry any further, but your baby has slanted eyes as well.” “Yes,” the girl continues, “there was a little Chinese man in the movie as well, I really had no choice.”
At this point, the midwife apologises once more, collects the baby, and hands her over to the girl, who immediately slaps the baby on the butt.
When the baby begins to cry, the mother exclaims, “Thank God for that!”
“What exactly do you mean?” “The midwife is taken aback.
“Well,” the relieved girl says, “I had this horrible feeling she was going to bark…”
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Why do Christians watch p*rn backward?
So they can wait for the second cumming.
What do you call an audiophile who is into furry p*rn and BDSM?
A subwoofer.
What would Bill gates’s p*rn star name be?
Microsoft.
What’s the name of Greece’s most famous p*rn star?
Testicles.
How can you tell a male p*rn star at a petrol station?
He pulls the nozzle out just before the tank is full and sprays the last bit over the windscreen and bonnet.
What is the alternative for p*rnstars for LinkedIn?
FilledIn.
Why are p*rn studios never renovated?
All the walls are load-bearing.
A boyfriend had a talk about p*rn with his girlfriend.
“I don’t get p*rn, why would you watch 2 people have s*x?” she asked.
The boyfriend replied, “Two?” The girlfriend looks surprised and then the boyfriend adds “People?”
Why are male p*rn stars such valued employees?
Because they are always hard at work.
Recommended: Dirty Humor Jokes
What do p*rn and Great Britain have in common?
BBC.
How is p*rn a lot similar to Professional wrestling?
All of it is exciting at first, and it’s great to watch when you’re free, but when you know how much of it is fake, it gets boring fast.
Did you hear what they said about the thalidomide p*rn star?
He had an arm like a baby’s c*ck.
Did you hear about the p*rn star’s favorite classic novel?
It’s entitled “Catch Her In The Eye.”
What do p*rnstars and Al Qaeda have in common?
They’re both great at bl*wjobs.
How do architects, engineers and male p*rnstars gain fame?
Through their erections.
A farmer has an impotent bull.
After months of desperation and trying everything, he seeks the assistance of another farmer, who instructs him to show the bull some hardcore p*rn. He has nothing to lose, despite the idiotic advice. He installs a projector in the barn and showers the bull with p*rn for several days, then exposes him to the cows.
Sure enough, the bull jumps on the first cow he sees and begins humping like a champ as the farmer watches in delight, which quickly turns to horror as the bull pulls out and begins to cum all over the cow’s face.
Recommended: Funny Farming Jokes
What’s a scarecrow’s favorite type of p*rn?
Hard corn.
What does an IT guy call his p*rn folder?
His Hard Drive.
Where can you watch vampire p*rn?
Onlyfangs.com.
Does anyone know of a cure for p*rn addiction?
Some have tried f*cking everything!
Where do P*rn Directors get their Burgers?
In-N-Out.
What do gay p*rnstars eat for dessert?
S*men rolls.
What do p*rnstars say after a shoot?
“It’s a business doing pleasure with you.”
A mom decides to clean her son’s room.
Under his bed, she finds a large collection of BDSM p*rn. Disturbed and not sure what to do she goes to her husband. “What should we do about this?” she asks.
He replied, “Well we sure as hell can’t spank him!”
What do laundromats, truck drivers, and p*rn stars all have in common?
They all get paid by the load
Did you hear about the new contemporary p*rn museum they opened?
It’s called The Stepsonian.
How did the p*rnstar make dill bread?
With a Dill Dough.
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Why did the blind p*rnstar get pregnant?
She didn’t see it coming.
What happens when a P*rnstar dies while shooting p*rn?
The Genre changes.
Why does god love p*rnstars so much?
Because they say his name more than his sons.
Fapping or laughing, these extra spicy p*rn puns will bring a smile to your face. Is that still insufficient? Comment below with your funniest jokes.
My friend has a very bad p*rn addiction. He is trying very hard to overcum.