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Why don't ghosts like rain on Halloween?
It dampens theirs spirits.
It dampens theirs spirits.
See lessWhat did the mountain climber name his son?
Cliff.
Cliff.
See lessWhy do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honey combs.
Because they use honey combs.
See lessWhat is the frayed knot joke?
A rope walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes." The rope goes into the bathroom, tangles himself up and frazzles his ends. He walks up to the bartender who says, "Aren't you that rope that was just in here?" And he says, "Sorry, I'm a frayed knot."
A rope walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve ropes.” The rope goes into the bathroom, tangles himself up and frazzles his ends. He walks up to the bartender who says, “Aren’t you that rope that was just in here?”
See lessAnd he says, “Sorry, I’m a frayed knot.”
What is brown and sticky?
A stick.
A stick.
See lessWhat do you call a guy with no shins?
Tony.
Tony.
See lessWhy shouldn’t you judge someone for watching midget p*rn?
We all have our shortcomings.
We all have our shortcomings.
See lessHow do you say "I wanna see gas " in Spanish?
In Spanish it is said as "Quiero ver gas." If you say fast enough ver gas sounds like vergas. The joke "How do you say 'I want to see gas' in Spanish?" leading to "Yo quiero vergas" plays on the phonetic closeness of "ver gas" (to see gas) and "vergas" (a vulgar term for "d*ck").
In Spanish it is said as “Quiero ver gas.” If you say fast enough ver gas sounds like vergas. The joke “How do you say ‘I want to see gas’ in Spanish?” leading to “Yo quiero vergas” plays on the phonetic closeness of “ver gas” (to see gas) and “vergas” (a vulgar term for “d*ck”).
See lessWhat is the Mike Pence sex joke?
“As president, I will take on the teachers union and win, just like I did in New Jersey. Right now, we have a president who is sleeping with a member of the teachers union,” Mr Christie said on Wednesday night, in reference to first lady Jill Biden, a teacher. “They have an advocate inside the WhiteRead more
“As president, I will take on the teachers union and win, just like I did in New Jersey. Right now, we have a president who is sleeping with a member of the teachers union,” Mr Christie said on Wednesday night, in reference to first lady Jill Biden, a teacher. “They have an advocate inside the White House every day as an advocate for them. They need to stop defending the worst teachers and start defending our kids.”
See less“Chris, you mentioned the president – my wife isn’t a member of the teachers’ union, but I gotta admit I have been sleeping with a teacher for 38 years … full disclosure,” Mr Pence said.
What is the Jimmy Carr's 9/11 joke?
"Now you might think that this is silly but I assure you it's absolutely true. When Zayn left One Direction for me, it was like 9/11. Yeah, I didn't care about that either."
“Now you might think that this is silly but I assure you it’s absolutely true. When Zayn left One Direction for me, it was like 9/11. Yeah, I didn’t care about that either.”
See less