Turns out, chickens have a wild side, at least in the world of jokes. Who knew a simple bird scratching in the dirt could inspire so many cheeky thoughts? Our Chicken Jokes don’t hold back. They strut right past polite humor and head straight into the coop of adult-only laughter.
It’s not just about the bird, it’s about the way people twist the words. Throw in a “c*ck” here or a “stripping hen” there, and suddenly you’re laughing harder than you should over poultry. These jokes aren’t for the farm, they’re for Friday nights, group chats, and anyone who thinks chicken can be a little… naughty.
Adult Chicken Jokes
What did the rooster tell the hen?
“Babe, you are the one for me because I like my chick hot.”
Just found out that c*ck fighting is done with chickens!
Well that’s 8 month’s of training wasted.
What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?
If you’re being erotic, you use a feather. If you’re being kinky, you use the entire chicken.
Why doesn’t Chick-fil-a have a double chicken sandwich?
2 chicks together aren’t their thing.
“Dad, I don’t want to go to school today,” said the boy. “Why not, son?”
“Well, one of the chickens on the school farm died last week, and we had chicken soup for lunch the next day. Then, three days ago, one of the pigs died, and we had roast pork the next day.” “But why don’t you want to go today?”
“Because our English teacher died yesterday!”
What are the two sexiest animals on the farm?
Brown Chicken, Brown Cow.
Have you heard about the new name for chicken salad?
Breast in plants.
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A chicken farmer goes into a bar, takes a seat next to a woman, and orders a glass of champagne.
The woman perks up and says, “How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!”
He turns to her and says, “What a coincidence. This is a special day for me, I’m celebrating.”
“This is a special day for me, too, and I’m also celebrating,” says the woman.
“What a coincidence,” says the man. They clink glasses and he asks, “What are you celebrating?”
“My husband and I have been trying to have a child. Today, my gynecologist told me I’m pregnant!”
“What a coincidence,” says the man. “I’m a chicken farmer. For years all my hens were infertile, but today they’re finally fertile.”
“That’s great,” says the woman. “How did your chickens become fertile?”
“I switched c*cks,” he replies.
“What a coincidence,” she said.
How to get a fat chick into the bed?
A piece of cake.
What do you get when a pehen and a rooster mate?
Peacock.
What do you call the period when a chicken is out of eggs?
Henopause.
What do strip clubs and chicken farms have in common?
They both raise c*cks.
A guy is walking down the street with some chicken wire under his arm.
His neighbour sees him and asks what he has.
The guy replies, “It’s chicken wire and I’m going to catch some chickens.”
His neighbour says, “You fool, you can’t catch chickens with chicken wire.”
Later that night, he sees the guy walking down the street, dragging 12 chickens.
The next day, he sees him walking down the street with some duct tape under his arm.
Once again, he asks what the guy is up to. The guy says he has some duct tape and he is going to catch some ducks.
He replies, “You fool, you can’t catch ducks with duct tape.” Sure enough later that night, he sees the guy walking down the street, dragging 12 ducks behind him.
The next day, he sees the guy walking with something else under his arm. He asks what it is.
The guy replies, “Its pu$$y willow.”
He says, “Hold on, let me get my hat.”
Chicken A: When will you complete your bucket list?
Chicken B: Not mine but somebody’s.
What are the swear words used among the hen?
Mother Clucker.
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On the anniversary, how did the chicken couple dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do you get when you breed an elephant with a chicken?
A dead chicken with a hole in it THIS BIG!
A farmer walks upstairs to his bedroom with a chicken under his arm and stands before his wife.
“This is the pig I’ve been f*cking”
His wife rolls over and sees the farmer.
“You idiot, that’s a chicken”.
“SHUT THE F UP IM TALKIN TO THE CHICKEN!”
What is the dirtiest thing about chickens?
It is a pet whose poop we have as breakfast.
What will happen if you leave a chicken in a minefield?
Peck, Peck, Peck and Boom!
Why did the chicken commit suicide?
To get to the other side.
So, what did the oven have to say to the chicken?
Can’t wait to have you inside me.
A woman walks into a butchery just before closing and asks, “Do you still have chicken?”
The butcher opens his deep freezer, takes out the only chicken left, and puts it on the scale, and it weighed 1.5 kg.
The woman looks at the chicken and at the scale and asks, “Do you have one that’s a bit bigger than this one?”
The butcher puts his only chicken back into the freezer, and then takes it out again, but this time, when he puts it on the scale, he craftily keeps his thumb on the scale pan, and the scale now shows 2 kg.
“That’s wonderful,” said the woman. “I’ll take both chickens, please!”
Did you know chickens die after sex?
Well, at least that’s been my experience so far.
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Why did Mozart kill all of his chickens?
When he asked him who the best composer was, they replied, “Bach Bach Bach”.
Why did the redneck cross the road?
His dick was stuck in the chicken.
Why don’t we name chicken breeds like how we name dog breeds?
No one would eat Mastiff C*ck for dinner.
A man named Steve just turned 30 and was still a virgin.
He decided it was finally time to change that, so he drove to the nearest brothel — a good 4 hours away.
When he arrived and asked the owner for a lady, the owner said, “Unfortunately, all of our ladies are booked up tonight. But for just $5, you can go to the back room and f*ck a chicken.”
Seeing as he drove all that way, Steve reluctantly accepted. He went to the back room, did the deed with the chicken, and drove home.
The next day, feeling unaccomplished, Steve decided to go back to the brothel to make up for the night before.
When he arrived again, the owner said, “Sorry, all the ladies are still booked. But for $5, you can watch two dwarfs have sex in the back room.” Once again, Steve accepted the offer.
He entered the room, saw two dwarfs going at it, and sat among a few other spectators.
After a while, Steve turned to the man next to him and whispered, “Is it just me, or is this kind of weird?”
The man replied, “You think this is weird? Yesterday we watched a guy f*ck a chicken!”
What’s the difference between a kink and a fetish?
A kink is a feather, a fetish is the whole chicken.
I was running a chicken dating website, but I had to close it down.
I was struggling to make hens meet.
Where do roosters go for a good time?
The chicken brothel.
A parrot swallows a Viagra tablet. His owner, disgusted, puts him in the freezer to cool off. Later when he opens the freezer, he finds the parrot sweating. “How come you are sweating?” he asks.
The parrot replies, “Do you know how hard it is to open the legs of a frozen chicken?”
Why don’t chickens have ears?
Because they come from Tyson farms.
Did you hear about the cooking of an autistic chicken?
It is a special recipe.
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Why don’t chickens need underwear?
Because their p*cker is on their face!
A farmer buys a new rooster to replace his old one and puts it in the chicken coop.
The new rooster walks up arrogantly to the old rooster and says, “Out of the way, old man! These are my hens now. Your time is done.” The old rooster rolls his eyes.
“Alright, fine, I get it. I’m old. But I still have some living left to do, and won’t give up my hens so easily. There is only room in this coop for one of us. Let’s settle it this way: we race around the coop. The winner stays, and the other goes.” The young rooster agrees to the challenge.
The old rooster says “but listen, I’m not the young c*ck I once was. You have to give me a 5-second head start to make it fair.” The young rooster agrees to these terms.
When race time comes, the young rooster counts down to start it. “3… 2…1… go!” The old rooster takes off running, giving it his all. After 5 seconds, the new rooster takes off after him. As they round the first turn of the race, the new rooster is already about to catch up to the old one, right on his heels.
The farmer is sitting on his porch watching. He stands up, grabs his shotgun, and shoots the young rooster, leaving only some blood and feathers. He says “DAMN IT! That’s the third gay rooster I’ve bought this month!”
Why was the chef thrown in jail?
For a-salting the chicken.
Why do chickens in Germany cross the road?
They are just following orders.
What is the worst part about having AIDS?
How everyone just assumes you like fried chicken and watermelon.
A chicken was walking along a river and noticed a cat.
The cat slipped and fell into the river, and the chicken couldn’t stop laughing.
Moral of the story: A wet pu$$y makes a c*ck happy.
What’s a chicken’s favorite p*rn category?
Bu-C*CK-e.
What can a chicken do that a man can’t?
Eat with it’s p*cker.
A guy walks into a place, squints at the sign outside.
He turns to the cashier, looking both confused and excited.
“Your sign outside says 3 strippers for 4.99… We talking topless or fully nude?”
“Sir, this is Domino’s pizza. They’re chicken strippers.”
“Ok, ok, now the price makes sense… How long is each dance?”
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Why did the chicken commit a crime?
Because he was egged on.
What do you call a white male chicken born in China?
A Cockasian.
Mexican word of the day: Chicken Finger.
I caught my wife cheating on me, I don’t need her no more, Chicken Finger herself.
What’s the difference between an agitated chicken and a giant mess?
One’s a flustered cluck and the other’s a cluster f*ck.
A woman walks into her accountant’s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says, “Before we begin, I’ll need to ask a few questions.”
He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, “What is your occupation?”
The woman replies, “I’m a wh*re.”
The accountant balks and says, “No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. Let’s try to rephrase that.”
The woman said, “Ok, I’m a prostitute.”
“No, that is still too crude. Try again.”
They both think for a minute, then the woman states, “I’m a chicken farmer.”
The accountant asks, “What does chicken farming have to do with being a wh*re or a prostitute?”
“Well, I raised over 5,000 c*cks last year.”
What do you say to a hit man who’s paid in chicken that fails his mission?
“No harm, no fowl.”
Why did the farmer’s wife hate the chickens?
He wouldn’t shut up about their breasts.
What do crossdressing female Japanese chickens wear to work?
Hen-tie.
Why was the chicken m@sturbating?
Because it was jerk chicken!
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This farmer has about 200 hens, but no rooster.
And he wants chicks. So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster. The other farmer says, “Yeah, I’ve got this great rooster, named Randy; he’ll service every chicken you’ve got. No problem.”
Well, Randy the rooster is a lot of money, but the farmer decides he’d be worth it. So, he buys Randy. The farmer takes Randy home and sets him down in the barnyard, giving the rooster a pep talk, “Randy, I want you to pace yourself now. You’ve got a lot of chickens to service here and you cost me a lot of money, and I’ll need you to do a good job. So, take your time and have some fun,” the farmer said with a chuckle.
Randy seemed to understand, so the farmer points towards the hen house and Randy took off like a shot ~WHAM~ He nails every hen in there THREE or FOUR times and the farmer is just shocked. Randy runs out of the hen house and sees a flock of geese down by the lake ~WHAM~ he gets all the geese. Randy’s up in the pigpen. He’s in with the cows. Randy is jumping on every animal the farmer owns.
The farmer is distraught, worried that his expensive rooster won’t even last the day. Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the next day to find Randy dead as a doorknob in the middle of the yard. Buzzards are circling overhead.
The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful animal, shakes his head and says, “Oh, Randy, I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you to slow down, but now look at what you’ve done to yourself.”
Randy opens one eye, nods towards the sky, and says, “Shhh. They’re getting closer…”
White chickens make white eggs. Brown chickens make brown eggs.
Yo mama must be a scrambled chicken.
What do you call two chickens in love?
Lesbihens.
Did you hear about the farmer who spent his whole stimulus check on baby chickens?
He got his money for nothing and his chicks for free.
What do you use to keep chickens off of you?
C*ck blocker.
A horse and a chicken were playing in a meadow.
The horse fell into a mud hole and is started to sink. The horse instructed the chicken to get the farmer so that he could be pulled to safety. The chicken ran to the farm, but the farmer was nowhere to be found….
Without a moment to spare, the chicken got into the farmer’s BMW and drove back to the mud hole. Then, the chicken tied some rope around the bumper, threw the other end of the rope to her friend, the horse, and proceeded to pull the horse to safety.
A few days later, the chicken and the horse were playing in the meadow again. This time around, the chicken fell into the mud hole. The chicken instructed the horse to get the farmer so that she could be pulled to safety.
Replied the horse, “Here’s the plan… I’ll stand over the hole…” The horse stretched over the length of the hole and continued, “Now, just grab for my p*nis and pull yourself to safety.”
The chicken obliged reluctantly and pulled herself to safety.
The moral of the story: If you’re hung like a horse, you don’t need a BMW to pick up chicks.
What do you call a group of racist chickens?
The Ku Klucks Klan.
Why did the suicidal chicken cross the road?
To get to the KFC.
What do you call a friend who brings you 2 dozen chicken wings?
A wing man.
What do you call a rooster who dresses up like a chicken?
Trans hen der.
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A priest kept chickens in his village. One evening, the c*ck went missing.
At the church prayer gathering, the priest asked, “Who has a c*ck?” All the men stood up.
“No, no — I meant, who has seen a c*ck?” All the women stood up.
“No, no, no — who has seen a c*ck that isn’t theirs?” Half the women stood up.
The priest sighed, “Oh for heaven’s sake… who has seen my c*ck?”
All the nuns stood up.
What do you call a French person who likes to eat chicken?
A Coque Saquer.
Why’d the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the ref was blowing fowls.
What do they call a male chicken in Britain?
Rorchestershire.
A farmer and his wife were laying in bed one evening.
The man tells his wife, “I read an article that says humans are the only species where the females can have an orgasm.”
“Prove it” She replied flirtatiously.
“Well… alright, here goes…”
He walked out and returned a few hours later.
“The sheep didn’t, the horse didn’t, but I couldn’t really tell with the chickens, they were just clucking a lot.”
What do you call frightened quadriplegics?
Chicken nuggets.
What did one lesbian frog say to the other?
We do taste like chicken!
What do you get when you mix a chicken and an owl?
A c*ck that stays up all night.
Do you have a dirty Chicken joke? Write down your funniest adult jokes in the comment section below!
