40 Funny Do Not Disturb Jokes to Keep the Boredom Away

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Jessica Amlee

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In the digital world, ‘Do Not Disturb’ has become the modern-day equivalent of a moat around a castle. It’s that magical setting on our devices that shields us from the never-ending barrage of notifications, messages, and calls. Think of it as a superhero cape for your phone, granting it the power to silence the chaos of the outside world. And let’s be honest, hitting that ‘Do Not Disturb’ button feels like having the last slice of pizza all to yourself – pure bliss! But in the realm of humor, ‘Do Not Disturb’ takes on a whole new life, birthing a hilarious genre known as Do Not Disturb Jokes.

Now, Do Not Disturb Jokes are like the quirky cousin of conventional humor. These jokes don’t knock on your door; they slide a note under it, winking at the irony of seeking attention while boldly stating, ‘Do Not Disturb’. They’re the perfect blend of irony and wit, served with a side of cheeky charm. Imagine jokes that are so good, they respect your boundaries but still manage to tickle your funny bone. Yes, these are the jokes that even your ‘Do Not Disturb’ setting would want to sneak a peek at! So, buckle up and get ready to dive into the hilarious paradox where the world of ‘Do Not Disturb’ meets the uproarious realm of jokes.

Best Do Not Disturb Jokes

What is an introvert’s favorite phone setting?
Do not disturb.

Why do they open medicine cabinets very carefully?
To not disturb and wake up the sleeping pills.

An old man saw a guy wearing a hat that said, “Do not Disturb me!”
So he asked him how much it costs and whether or not it works.

When do you not disturb a broom?
The moment it’s sweeping.

What’s more dangerous than a ‘Do not disturb’ sign?
A sign that says, “Already Disturbed, Proceed Caution!”

Why is it called white noise?
Because if it wasn’t white, it’d be called disturbing the peace.

A man witnessed a kidnapping.
Later he explained, “I thought about calling the cops but figured I shouldn’t disturb him!”

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Disturb who?)
Disturb the peace, and you’ll meet the police!

What did the employee’s DND sign say on Sunday?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m in a meeting with my bed, and it’s a very long one.”

What do you call a security guard who won’t stop bothering you about your lack of ID?
A badger!

What is white and disturbs your breakfast?
An avalanche.

Why did the triangle not disturb the circle?
It was pointless.

What did the Japanese mercenary’s DND sign say during training?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m practicing my ninja skills and you don’t want to become part of the training!”

Did you hear about the man who got arrested for ruining the community garden?
They charged him with disturbing the peas.

What did the DND sign at the programmer’s desk during a late-night coding session say?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m negotiating with the coffee machine for one more cup.”

Why should you not disturb dwarves?
They’re just mining their own business.

What did the remote worker’s home office door sign say?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m on a date with my Wi-Fi, and we’re having connection issues.”

A man checks into a hotel for the first time in his life and goes up to his room.
Five minutes later he calls the desk and says, “You’ve given me a room with no exit. How do I leave?”
The desk clerk says, “Sir, that’s absurd. Have you looked for the door?”
The person says, “Well, there’s one door that leads to the bathroom. There’s a second door that goes into the closet. And there’s a door I haven’t tried, but it has a ‘do not disturb’ sign on it.”

Why did one lock himself in the room with a computer?
Because he needed a bit of space!

What did the procrastinator’s DND sign say?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m in the middle of a fantasy where I actually get all my work done.”

What do you call someone who talks during an orchestra?
A disturber of the piece.

What did the insomniac’s bedroom door sign say?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m counting the sheep that I never got to count last night.”

What is a couple’s favorite sign?
The “Do Not Disturb” sign.

What do you call an occupied bathroom at a math conference?
A ‘pi-occupied’ zone!

The boss was busy and did not want to be disturbed.
He told his secretary to tell visitors he didn’t want to be disturbed. If they persisted with some story about how important it was, she should tell them “That’s what they all say.”
Later that day, the boss’ wife stopped by to visit her husband. The secretary told her that he didn’t want to be disturbed. The wife said, “That doesn’t apply to me, I’m his wife.” So obediently, the secretary said, “Yeah, that’s what they all say.”

What did the introvert say to the extrovert who kept knocking on their door?
“I put a sign up for a reason!”

What did the botanist’s lab door sign say?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m having a very important conversation with my plants.”

What do you call a “Do Not Disturb” sign that’s been ignored?
A mere suggestion.

Why people are disturbed by the sun while driving?
Just close your eyes and it’s not a problem.

Did you all hear about the domestic disturbance at the seafood restaurant?
Apparently, three fish got battered!

What’s the difference between a “Do Not Disturb” sign and a “Welcome” mat?
About 180 degrees.

What did the magician’s office door sign say?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m learning how to disappear in a room so people will think I’m working.”

Josey could have been better at Sunday school. She often fell asleep and one day while she was sleeping, the teacher asked her a question.
“Who is the creator of the universe?” Joe was sitting next to Josey and decided to poke her with a pin to wake her up. Josey jumped and yelled, “God almighty!”
The teacher congratulated her. A little later the teacher asked her another question, “Tell me who is our lord and savior?” Joe poked Josey again and she yelled out, “Jesus Christ!” The teacher congratulated her again.
Later on, the teacher asked, “What did Eve say to Adam after their 26th child?” Joe poked Josey again and she shouted, “If you stick that thing in me again, I’ll snap it in half and stick it up your a**!”

What did the philosopher’s study door sign say?
“Do Not Disturb: I’m currently in a soul-crushing meeting with my conscience.”

What did the burglar say when he saw a “Do Not Disturb” sign on a house?
“Challenge accepted!”

This woman hung a ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign on her fridge.
She said, “It’s about time it stops calling me late at night!”

Why did the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign break up with the door?
It felt ignored and wanted to handle things differently.

What’s the best way to ensure that no one bothers you?
Put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on your forehead.

What’s the most polite way to tell someone to leave you alone?
Write “Do Not Disturb” in glitter glue. It’s both effective and festive.

Why did the cat put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on its litter box?
Because it was taking a very important “paws”.

Do you have a funny joke about Do Not Disturb? Write down the puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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