30 Funny Hairline Jokes And Roasts That Are Not Receding

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Jessica Amlee


A receding hairline is a common type of hair loss in which the hairline moves backward from the forehead and the temples, creating a “M” shape. This can occur in both men and women and is often a result of aging, genetics, or other factors such as stress, hormonal changes, or certain medical conditions.

People create jokes about a receding hairline as a way to cope with the issue or to make light of a sensitive subject. Joking about a receding hairline can be seen as a form of self-deprecating humor, allowing people to acknowledge and accept their hair loss in a playful way.

Funny Hairline Jokes

What do you call 20 rabbits walking backward?
A receding hairline.

The devil has started to get self-conscious about his receding hairline and is planning to take out his anger on the humans if he can’t find a solution.
There’s going to be hell toupee.

Your hairline goes so back that the History Channel made a show about it.

How do lice fly home for Christmas?
American Hairlines

What’s worse than a receding hairline?
An advancing hairline.

Yo daddy’s hairline so far back, that even Rosa Parks sat in front of it.

Why are all french soldiers bald?
Their hairline only knows retreating.

Your hairline goes so back so far back, archaeologists couldn’t find it.

Did you hear that Chris’s father shaved his head the other day because of his receding hairline?
Pretty bald move if you ask me!

What do you call it when you have proof that you bought a wig?
A receipting hairline.

Your hairline looks like the McDonald’s logo.

Two older male dolphins realize that their hairlines are receding.
Dolphins, too, go bald. It’s difficult for people to detect, but dolphins do… Anyway…
Recognizing the loss of their youth and experiencing a profound sense of their own mortality, they understandably become depressed.
“Hey compadre, we don’t have to just accept this as our new normal, ya know?” one dolphin says to his companion in a moment of clarity. With current fashion and technology, we can do something about this!”
So they went out and bought matching hairpieces. They were toupees in a pod.

Did you hear about the bald guy who cracked his skull?
The doctor said he had a receding hairline fracture.

Recommended: Bald Jokes

Your hairline is so bad, even Bob the Builder couldn’t fix it.

What did one wig ask the other wig before going on a vacation?
“With which hairline are you flying with?”

Did you hear about the fella who tried to cut his own hair?
He was rushed to the hospital with a hairline fracture.

What do you call a receding hairline?
An airline.

Yo mama‘s hairline got so many peaks and valleys you thought you were looking at the Grand Canyon.

Did you hear that Chris Rock apologized and took the joke back?
Now it’s a receding hair line.

An elderly man lived near a forest. As he grew older, he began to lose his hair, until he was entirely bald on his deathbed. He summoned his children to a meeting that day.
He explained, “Take a look at my hair. It was once wonderful, but it is now completely gone. My hair is beyond repair. However, take a look outside at the forest. It’s a beautiful forest with many trees, but they’ll all be taken down sooner or later, and this forest will be as bald as my hair.”
“What I want you to do…” said the man. “Is to plant a new tree in my memory every time a tree is cut down or dies. Tell your heirs to do the same. It will be our family’s responsibility to maintain this forest strong.”
That is precisely what they did.
When the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, as did their children, and their children’s children, and so on.
And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was, all because of one man and his re-seeding heirline.

Your hairline is so far back, it left before your dad.

Your hairline is so far back, even Dora the Explorer couldn’t find it.

Your hairline is so far back, you’ll find Waldo before you find your hairline.

Your hairline is so far back, people learned about it in history class.

Your hairline is so bad, the cops had to do a breathalyzer test on your barber.

Your hairline is so far back, an uber from your eyebrows to your hairline is like $40.

Your hairline is so far back that five-hour energy became a five-day depression.

Your hairline is so far back that it goes back to when Adam and Eve were born.

Your hairline goes all the way back to when burger king was a burger prince.

Your hairline is like the universe – it’s still waiting to be discovered.

Your hairline is so far back that you need binoculars to see it.

Have a better hairline joke? Post your own hairline roasts and puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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