Tesla makes electric cars that are so quiet, you might think they’re silently judging traffic. These cars run on batteries, update through Wi-Fi, and some even try to drive themselves, just don’t ask them to parallel park near a bush. With names like Model S, Model 3, and the famously sharp-edged Cybertruck, Tesla has turned driving into a futuristic game where your car might one day argue back. No wonder people can’t stop coming up with Tesla Jokes, when your vehicle has more buttons than your TV remote, there’s comedy charging up.
And that’s where the fun really begins. Tesla Jokes takes all the high-tech features and mix them with the silly stuff we deal with every day. What happens when a car updates in the middle of a date? Or when voice control misunderstands “play music” as “open the windows”? These jokes spark laughter because they show how even the smartest cars can’t escape human nonsense.
Best Tesla Jokes
New Teslas don’t come with a new car smell.
They come with an Elon Musk.
What’s a Tesla driver’s favourite lane to drive in?
The far-right.
Did you know Tesla came out with a model exclusively in Canada?
It’s a Model Eh.
What do you call a stolen Tesla?
An Edison.
Yo mama so fat, when a Tesla wants to drive around her, it has to charge 4 times.
What do you call the combination of Tesla, SpaceX, and The Boring Company?
3Musketeers.
Did you hear that Elon Musk announced an Odd location for the New Tesla Factory?
It’s in Mad-at-gas-car.
What happens when a Tesla drifts?
It’s called the electric slide.
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Tesla recalls 376,241 vehicles due to a power steering issue.
Apparently they’ve all started making uncontrollable hard-right turns.
Two friends chat and one brags about his new car.
“So I got a new Tesla Model 2, it drives itself!”
“Nice! Where is it?”
“No idea…”
Elon Musk is getting offended that people are calling Tesla Cars “Swastikars.”
He’s Fuhrious about it.
Did you hear about Tesla’s new slogan?
“Why zig when you can sieg!”
What do Elon Musk and Thomas Edison have in common?
They both got rich off of Tesla.
Did you hear Tesla’s third vehicle will be a three-wheeled motorcycle?
They’re going to call it The Third Trike.
What’s the difference between Chris Brown and a Tesla Model S?
The Tesla gets fewer battery charges in a year.
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Besides Elon Musk, what do Tesla and SpaceX have in common?
They explode.
A snail crawls into a Tesla dealership.
A salesman asks how he can help. The snail says, “I want a Model S.”
The salesman scoffs and says, “You’re a snail. Why would you want a Tesla Model S?”
The snail sadly replies, “Nobody ever pays attention or even notices me. I can’t seem to make friends or meet girls. I figure if they see me speeding by in my Tesla, they’ll finally say, “Wow! Look at that S car go!”
Why does Mr. T drive a Tesla?
Because he pities the fuel.
Did you hear that a lot of people want a Tesla Roadster?
But the price keeps skyrocketing!
Why did Elon Musk send a Tesla into outer space?
When NASA sent a Challenger up, it didn’t go so well.
Why was Nikola Tesla a fan of Marvel?
Because he didn’t like DC.
What will Tesla name their electric lawnmower?
E-Lawn.
Tesla has announced they are going to build the world’s biggest battery.
Yet it still won’t last a day on an iPhone.
Did you hear what they’re calling this Tesla scandal?
Elongate, it’s gonna be really drawn out.
Did you hear about the blonde who tried to commit su*cide?
She closed her garage door,
And sat in her Tesla,
While she left it running.
If Tesla made a gun, what would it be called?
Elon Musk-et.
Tesla is considering releasing a line of electric buses named after Egyptian gods.
It’ll be A-new-bus.
Imagine missing a payment on a Tesla,
And the car drives itself back to the dealership.
What’s the difference between a Tesla and an ambulance?
You can afford a ride in a Tesla.
Italian Chefs can now get an exclusive software update for their Tesla.
It’s been named Carpatchio.
Did you know that when someone gets run over by a Tesla, it isn’t considered Vehicular Manslaughter?
They call it an electric car battery!
What’s the difference between a porcupine and a Tesla?
A porcupine carries its pricks on the outside.
What do you call a criminal driving a Tesla?
A Joule Thief.
Why aren’t Teslas selling in Russia?
Because they don’t have reliable electricity, and they will be Stalin.
Did you hear about Elon Musk sending a Tesla car into space?
To drift for all eternity.
Who solved the mystery of the stolen Tesla?
Sherlock Ohms.
Now that Elon Musk has launched his Tesla Roadster into orbit, why is space soon going to be full of diseases?
Because it’s no longer auto immune.
What did the German boy say after pushing his brother out of a Tesla?
“Look Mom, No Hans.”
What’s your opinion on the new Tesla Cybertruck?
Think it has a sharp design.
What did Peter Parker say to Elon Musk?
“With great power comes great electricity bill.”
Where do Tesla cars go to pray?
An Elon mosque.
What do you call an elephant that runs Tesla?
Elon Tusk!
What is the first song that should be played in every new Tesla?
Metallica – Battery.
Tried auto pilot in my Tesla in Germany.
It went straight to Poland.
What kind of insect can go from 0-60 mph in under 3 seconds?
A moth on a Tesla’s windshield.
Do you have a funny Tesla Joke? Write down your best ones in the comment section below!
Apparently driving electric vehicles makes you less tired.
It’s because regular cars are more exhausting.