Jokes

75 Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes for Kids in 2025

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Jessica Amlee

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Valentine’s Day is a special time when people celebrate love and friendship, and kids can join in on the fun too! It’s all about giving cards, candy, and maybe even a heart-shaped balloon to show someone you care. Valentine’s Day Jokes for kids are a great way to spread some laughs and make the day even more exciting. At school, kids might exchange funny cards with jokes that get everyone giggling or even make up their own silly punchlines to share with friends.
When it comes to Valentine’s Day Jokes for kids, the possibilities are endless! Whether it’s a funny story about Cupid or a silly rhyme about candy, these jokes can add a lot of fun to the day. Kids love to make each other laugh, so why not add a few jokes to your card or share them at the lunch table? After all, laughter is the best way to show someone you care.

Best Valentine’s Day Kid Jokes

What dinosaur should you watch out for on Valentine’s Day?
A Hug-o-saurus Rex!


Who is the fish’s valentine?
His Gil-Friend!


Who always has a date on Valentine’s Day?
A calendar.


A wife just called her husband and said, “Three of the girls in the office have just received some flowers for Valentine’s Day. They are absolutely gorgeous!”
The husband replied, “That’s probably why they’ve received flowers then.”


I love my dentist.
Every year I give him a little plaque.


What do you call two worms in love?
Soilmates.


How did the fire fall in love?
It found it’s perfect match.


Why is dating a tennis player a bad idea?
Because love means nothing to them.


Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
Because every buck is dear to him.


One morning, after she woke up, a woman told her husband, “I just dreamed that you gave me a diamond necklace for Valentine’s Day. What do you think it means?”
“Maybe you’ll find out tonight…,” he said.
That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it – to find a book entitled: “The Meaning of Dreams.”


Why was Luke Skywalker unlucky with love?
He was looking in Alderaan places.


Yes, you will have a date on Valentine’s Day!
Just look next to the raisins.


What is a pirate’s favorite letter?
You would think it is R, but his true love is the C.


You can give roses to someone to show that you love them
But you need Tulips to kiss them.


Recommended: Valentine’s Day Jokes


Why did the duck fall in love with the dog?
He was pure bread.


Roses are red,
Poppies are red,
The grass is red,
Oh no my yard is on fire!


Did you hear about the man who made a chart of past relationships for Valentine’s Day?
It has an ex-axis and a why-axis.


My Valentine is like the square root of -100.
A 10, but imaginary.


What did the lightbulb say to his Valentine?
“I love you watts and watts!”


Two octopuses walked into a bar.
The bartender said, “I feel like putting some mood music on for Valentine’s, any requests?
The first Octopus said, “Well can you play our wedding song?”
The bartender said, “Name it, I can stream anything!”
The second Octopus said, “I wanna hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand.”


Sometimes I forget the point of Valentine’s Day.
But then I remember – it’s at the end of Cupid’s arrow.


Be My Bovine-tine.
The new Valentine’s card for cows this year!


Why do most people get Halloween and Valentine’s Day confused?
They’re both about candy and being something you’re not.


I already got a date this Valentine’s Day. Her name is Emma,
Emma Gination.


What’s the difference between you and a calendar?
A calendar has a date for Valentine’s Day.


This wife told her husband “For Valentine’s Day, nothing would make me happier than a diamond necklace”
So he got her nothing.


A detective is staking out the entrance of a romantic restaurant.
After a few hours of not seeing the criminals he’s looking for, he gets hungry. He calls his partner to fill in for five minutes while he grabs some dinner and tells him to “take a picture of every single person that walks through the door.”
The partner waits for the detective to return and when he does the detective asks to see the photos that he took.
The partner replies, “I didn’t see any single people, I saw a lot of couples though.”


What do cows call each other when they are in love?
Significant udders.


I used to open so many cards on Valentine’s Day.
Eventually, the post office fired me for it.


What did Barack Obama write inside his Valentine’s card?
“I’m glad I’ve got you Michelle; I didn’t want to be Obamaself”


This man bought his girlfriend a fridge for Valentine’s Day.
A bit of an unconventional present but you should have seen her face light up when she opened it.


What do you call horses in love?
A stable relationship.


If you are not in love on Valentine’s Day, don’t worry.
You don’t have to be dead on Halloween, either.


I have a date for Valentine’s.
February the 14th.


Why is it hard for Liam Neeson to enjoy Valentine’s Day?
Because all the girls are taken.


From my handwriting identification skills.
I have carefully deduced that Santa is my secret Valentine every year.


What did the French chef give his wife on Valentine’s Day?
A hug and a quiche.


Why did the woman fall in love with a lumberjack?
He was a very sappy guy.


What did the arsonist do on Valentine’s Day?
He met his match.


This year for Valentine’s day I gave people a can of root beer and a can of refried beans.
Told them to have a rootin’ tootin’ Valentine’s Day.


What did the boy cat say to the girl cat on Valentine’s Day?
“You’re purr-fect for me!”


What do you call a Skeleton that love bombs you?
An X O skeleton.


Why was the sock feeling down on Valentine’s Day?
Because he couldn’t find his sole mate.


What grade did St. Valentine get on his exam?
Be Mine-us.


Two fruits were in love but they couldn’t get married.
They weren’t a pear.


Do you know why ticks from Rome love Valentine’s Day?
Cause they’re Roman-ticks.


What did Han Solo’s Valentine to Leia say?
“Yoda Obi Wan for me.”


What do you get a Collie for Valentine’s Day?
Collie Flowers.


What type of flowers do sailors give on Valentine’s Day?
Forget-me-knots.


What do you call a pair of gloves that are in love?
Smittens.


What do you call someone who was born on Valentine’s Day?
A love child.


How does the rancher who owns oxen sign his Valentine’s Day card to his wife?
OX OX OX OX.


Why shouldn’t you fall in love with a pastry chef?
They’ll dessert you.


Why did the candle fall in love?
He found the perfect match.


Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married on Valentine’s Day.
The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was incredible!


What happens when two raindrops fall in love?
They become rain-beaus.


Recommended: Adult Valentine’s Day Jokes


Karate teachers love Valentine’s Day jokes.
They get a real kick out of them. And they especially enjoy the punchline.


What do you call two salads madly in love?
Hopeless romainetics.


Two potatoes are in love.
One turns to the other and says, “You are my sweet potato.”
The other one replies back, “Yes, I yam!”


What’s the only letter of the alphabet that everybody loves?
It’s U.


Why did the dust bunny fall in love with the roomba?
Because it was swept off it’s feet.


Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Emma.
(Emma who?)
Emma hoping I get lots of cards on Valentine’s Day!


What is love?
Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more.


What kind of dinosaur writes romance novels?
A Bronte-saurus.


Why are numbers 1 and 2 the most romantic numbers?
Because they are <3.


Recommended: Cupid Jokes


Why are geologists so romantic?
They know the best dating techniques.


Gloves are so romantic.
They are always holding your hands.


Why did the sheriff lock up his girlfriend?
She stole his heart.


What did the dirt say to the rock on Valentine’s Day?
“I’d settle for you.”


What did the rabbit say to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?
“Somebunny loves you!”


Why do Valentines have hearts on them?
Because spleens would look pretty gross.


Do you have a funny Valentine’s Day Joke? Write down your best kid-friendly ones in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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