Space is huge, quiet, and filled with mystery that makes you stop and think a little longer. The more you try to figure it out, the more your thoughts start drifting in all directions, like they won’t settle down. It can feel serious and confusing, yet there’s something funny about how your mind keeps going in circles.
That’s where space jokes step in. They take those big, confusing thoughts and make them feel light and easy. Instead of getting stuck in endless thinking, they help you relax and enjoy the moment. Sometimes, when something feels too big to understand, the best thing you can do is keep it simple and have a little fun with it.

Funny Space Jokes

Why are dogs afraid to go to space?
Because of the vacuum.

Gravity is one of the fundamental forces of the universe. What happens when it is removed?
Gravy.

Why is gravity so cheap?
It’s mass-produced.

At the end of the physics lecture, I asked the professor, “What happened before The Big Bang?”
He said, “Sorry. There’s no time.”

Why didn’t NASA send a duck into space?
The bill would be astronomical.

Really enjoying my new life aboard the giant space station designed to “solve Earth’s overpopulation problem”.
Just a bit weird how the sun gets slightly bigger in my cabin window every day.

Why is it better to bring dogs into space than cats?
Because you don’t have to worry about any cat-astro-fees.

Orion’s Belt is a waist of space.
Bad pun, I know. 3 stars at best.

What did the black hole say after it swallowed an asteroid?
“It was good, but I wish it been a little meteor.”

Why haven’t Aliens visited our Solar System yet?
They looked at the reviews… Only 1 star.

What did the sun say to the blackhole?
“You suck.”

In space, two aliens are talking to each other.
The first alien says, “The dominant life forms on the Earth planet have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons.”
The second alien asks, “Are they an emerging intelligence?”
The first alien says, “I don’t think so, they have aimed at themselves.”

NASA is launching a new satellite to say sorry to any aliens who may have visited Earth.
It’s to be named Apollo G.

Have you seen the new pen that writes underwater, upside down and in outer space?
It writes lots of other words too.

When you’re trying to slingshot around Jupiter but you run out of fuel and end up on a collision course with one of Jupiter’s moons…
Europa creek with no paddle.

As soon as space travel is possible, I’m moving from the Milky Way to the Soymilky Way galaxy.
I’m galactose intolerant.

Why are Astronauts always so calm?
There’s no pressure in space.

Recommended: Astronaut Jokes

What do you call an Australian in space?
An Austronaut.

What did the asteroid say when the reporter asked it a question?
“No comet.”

Two Astronauts are chilling on the space station when one turns to the other and says, “I can’t find any milk for my coffee.”
The second astronaut replies, “In space no one can, here use cream.”

What do you call an NCO in the Space Force?
A stargeant.

Did you know that every planet in our solar system is named after a god?
Except Earth… which is named after all that stuff on the ground.

NASA was experimenting with different animals in space.
Monkeys were an obvious choice, but they had no patience. Mice chewed all the cables, dogs were too stupid and chickens were always scared. It seemed the only animal that could cope with the intense stress of space travel was a chilled out alley cat.
After a few months of testing and training, he was ready for his first mission. The cat was to embark on a journey to Saturn’s moon, Titan, to discover if life would be sustainable…
The rocket prepares for take off.
5…
4…
3…
2…
1…
BLAST OFF!!
UP
UP
UP
UP
UP
UP
UP
…and POW the cat bursts through Earth’s atmosphere and begins his journey as the first feline in outer space.
A few weeks go by, and after a while the cat starts to get bored. He spots a red planet nearby, and although he tries to resist the temptation, he sets the shuttle on a new course. Before Houston could stop him, he lands on Mars.
Houston sends a probe to investigate what the hell the cat was up to and why he decided to venture so far off course.
The probe gets to Mars and finds tracks, which lead it to an area of wreckage and signs of a fight.
The cat is dead, flat as a pancake on the ground and a robot, once sent to explore Mars, had cat remains trodden into its tracks.
It was clear… Curiosity killed the cat.

What do you call J.K. Rowling in space?
AstroTERF.

Just went to the Air & Space museum.
Man do I feel ripped off. It was just an empty room.

What happened before the Big Bang?
God standing with his fingers in his ears.

How do you tie your shoes in space?
With astro-knots.

What do you call currency in space?
Starbucks.

The asteroid event that ended the dinosaurs…
was technically the highest ratio of killing birds to one stone.

Two satellites get married.
The wedding was alright, but the reception was amazing!

Yuri Gagarin returned from space and Khrushchev asked him a question, “While you were up there, did you see god?”
Yuri replied, “Yes.”
“That’s what I suspected, but don’t tell anybody.”
Gagarin traveled to Rome and met the Pope, who asked him a question, “While you were up there, did you see god?”
Yuri replied, “No.”
“That’s what I suspected, but don’t tell anybody.”

You’re living. You have mass. You occupy space. Do you know what that means?
You matter.

What do you call a Mexican space chicken?
Apollo.

Einstein developed a theory about space…
…it was about time too.

Why do people on the ISS use Linux?
You can’t open windows in space.

Yoda and Obi-Wan in a spaceship.
Obi-Wan asks, “Are we going the right way?”
Yoda answers, “Off course, we are.”

Overcome with the beauty of the Earth from space, the astronaut removed his helmet.
The view was breathtaking.

Gravity walks into a bar in space…
And sh*t goes down.

In space, every book is a good book.
You simply can’t put it down.

An astronaut is the first to step onto an alien planet. The alien’s are so excited that they change all their signs to English, and even rename some of their places and landmarks after Human places and landmarks and things.
The astronaut decides the first place he wants to go is a pub. He sees a nearby alien and asks, “where’s the pub?”
The alien gurgles back but his suit translates to the astronaut in real time. The alien says, “just around the corner!”
The astronaut heads around the corner and sees it! It’s labelled “The Keyboard” and he asks the bouncer, “Why is it called the Keyboard?”
The bouncer replies, “the boss loves all things human and changed his name to reflect that. Ask him, he’s the bartender.”
So the astronaut enters the Keyboard and goes to the bartender.
“Excuse me, do you own this pub?” The astronaut says.
“I do.” The bartender gurgles back.
“Why is it called the Keyboard?” The man asks.
“Well,” the alien gurgles in reply, “since I knew you humans were coming I updated the name!”
The astronaut is on the edge of his seat…
“The reason it’s called the Keyboard is because… it’s a space bar.”

What do astronomers say to each other when they want to start a fight?
“Comet me, bro!”

Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?
He just needed a little space.

What do you call an acorn in space?
An astronut.

Did you hear about a movie about a fridge lost in space?
It was a real sci-fi chiller.

What did the wind tunnel say to the aerospace engineer?
“I’m a big fan!”

Why did the Russians lose the space race?
Their rockets kept Stalin..

What do you call a Mexican in space?
An astronaut you idiot.

How do potatoes get to the moon?
They fly in space-chips.

What do you call the combination of Tesla, SpaceX, and The Boring Company?
3Musketeers.

A black hole walks into a bar.
Bartender says, “Oh not you again!”
“Yeah it’s me, set me up.”
“Usual light beer?” says the bartender.
“Of course, bring on the puns.”
Lady at the bar says, “So your the famous blackhole we have been hearing so much about and that you know the answer to every joke.”
Blackhole explains, “Yeah, well, nothing escapes me.”

Why are there no drag queens in space?
Because there is very little drag and whatever drag there is in LEO is caused by miniscule amounts of athmospheric gasses and tidal forces!

Did you hear about the recent race to send a cow to space?
The steaks will be higher than ever.

How do you organize a space party?
You planet!

What game does an introvert play in public?
Space invaders.

Yo mama so attractive, if the sun would vanish our solar system would still be intact because of yo mamma’s pull!

Where is Mission Control for the Irish Space Agency located?
County Down.

What do you call a security guard at a Samsung store?
“A guardian of the galaxys.”

Did you hear about the restaurant they opened on the International Space Station?
There is zero atmosphere but the food is out of this world.

What do you call it when a guy helps his buddy open a soda in space?
An astrofizzassist.

A student is taking an astronomy class in college.
One day, the professor lectures about the solar system and mentions the sun will explode and kill all life on Earth in about 5 billion years.
After class, the student nervously approaches the professor and asks, “Professor, excuse me, but did you say the sun is going to explode and destroy the Earth in five million years?”
The professor shakes his head and says, “No, no. I said five billion years.”
The student clutches his chest, lets out a massive sigh of relief, and says, “Oh, thank goodness. You really had me worried there for a minute!”

Why are space heaters so friendly?
They always say HI.

What do you call a guitar in space?
deFender of the galaxy.

Why was Jupiter banned from competing in the planetary boxing match?
He took asteroids.

What do you call a space magician?
A flying saucerer.

Why are there no churches in space?
Without gravity there can be no mass.

Chris Hemsworth is Australian and Thor is from space.
Does that make him an AUSTRALIEN?

What would be the first thing communists do if they ruled the solar system?
Rename Uranus to Ouranus.

Why are all those billionaires trying to get to space?
Because guillotines require gravity to work.

What happens when a mommy atom and a daddy atom love each other very much?
The big bang.

Apollo Program first sent humans on the moon in 1969, yet 55 years later, it’s still not repeated. Why does space technology progress extremely slowly?
Innovation doesn’t happen in a vacuum.

What do you do if you see a spaceman?
You park your car, man!

Where do cows go in space?
The moooooooooon.

Recommended: Alien Jokes

What did the flat-earther say after finally seeing the Earth from space?
Half of the so-called “continents” are missing.

Two other guys pulled out from going on a space flight tomorrow with William Shatner.
Right after, they were issued red shirts for the mission.

What is space like without a spacesuit?
Breathtaking.

Space Rocks that hit the Earth are called Meteorites.
The ones that miss are called Meteowrongs.

What do you call the first Hawaiian in space?
A Coconaut.

What do you call it when one space telescope crashes into another space telescope?
A kaleidoscope.

What do you call an amphibian that goes to space?
An Astronewt.

What do you call a spaceship powered by methane?
The fart-emis.

What is the craziest space insect?
A lunar-tick.