50 Funny Dolphin Jokes And Puns For A Tidal Wave of Humor

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Jessica Amlee

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Knock knock. Who’s there? Nofin. Nofin who? Nofin beats a good dolphin joke, don’t you think? Dolphin jokes are a fun way to dive into the world of these fascinating creatures while sharing laughter and smiles with your friends. These creatures are known for their playful and intelligent nature, which makes them the perfect inspiration for hilarious jokes and puns. Their leaps and flips create a sense of wonder and excitement, making them a captivating sight to behold. Additionally, dolphins have a unique and recognizable appearance, with their iconic smile-like expression that gives them an endearing quality.

Whether you’re a fan of dolphin acrobatics or just love a good giggle, these fin-tastic jokes are sure to brighten your day. Imagine the laughter echoing through the waves as you share these witty and amusing jokes with your buddies.

From bottlenose banter to porpoise-ful puns, dolphin jokes are a tidal wave of humor that will have young readers and ocean enthusiasts grinning from ear to ear. So, get ready to make a splash and explore the wonderful world of dolphin jokes!

Best Dolphin Jokes

What do dolphins doing calculus sound like?
(eᴱ)’ = Eeᴱ

Did you hear about the man who had a great conversation with a dolphin?
He just… don’t know. They just clicked.

Yo mama so fat, instead of swimming with the dolphins she goes out to the ocean and swims with the whales.

A teacher told her first grade class, “A single dolphin can have two hundred off-spring!”
A little girl gasped, “How about the married ones?”

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Dolphin who?)
Dolphinitely glad to sea you, let’s make a splash together!

Why did the fisherman commit suicide when the last dolphin died?
Because his life had no porpoise.

What do you call a boring person from Finland?
A dolphin.

A new study of dolphins was recently performed.
The study showed that within a few weeks in captivity, they were able to teach humans to stand at the edge of their pool and throw fish at them.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Somefin who?)
Somefin tells me you’re going to have a fin-tastic time reading these dolphin jokes!

Do you know that scientists have announced that dolphins are second to man in intelligence levels?
So that pushes women down to third place.

Yo mama so fat, when she put on fishnet stockings she caught a dolphin.

What do you call a dolphin that is out of the water?

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German are watching a dolphin do some tricks.
The dolphin notices that the four guys have a very poor view, so he jumps higher out of the water and calls out, “Can you all see me now?”
And they respond, “‘Yes.’ ‘Oui.’ ‘Sí.’ ‘Ja.’”

What do you call a German dolphin?

Do dolphins speak Welsh?
Or is it just Wales?!

Why did the dolphin cross the bay?
To get to the other tide.

What do dolphins write letters of recommendation with?
Their endorsal fins!

How does a group of dolphins make a decision?
Flipper coin!

A cop was patrolling a neighborhood after receiving a call from dispatch about suspicious activity.
He stopped a man walking past.
Cop: Seen anything unusual?
Kid: A dolphin with a hat once.
Cop: I mean around here.
Kid: Nah they live in water.

How do dolphins become happy?
They produce endolphins.

Why do dolphins swim in salt water?
Because they would sneeze in pepper water.

Why are Dolphins so successful at dating?
They always click with one another!

How do dolphins and whales pass down and share knowledge through the generations?
Via podcasts, naturally.

What happens when you cross a rhinoceros with a dolphin?
You get horn-ee-ee-ee-ee.

What did the emo dolphin say?
There’s no porpoise in life.

A man with hearing loss collided with a high-end vehicle.
“Give me 10.000 bucks or I’ll beat the crap out of you!!” says the owner of the expensive car as he goes out of his house. “Woah woah friend, I don’t have that much, but let me call my son, he trains dolphins,” the father replies. The father phones his son, and just as he begins to speak, the owner of the luxury car yanks the phone from his grasp and asks, “So you train dolphins? Well, bring me $10,000 or I’ll beat your father!”, the son replies, “Alright, give me 15 minutes and I’ll be there.”
15 minutes later the son pulls up with a jeep and outcomes 10 men who start beating the owner of the car. Meanwhile, the son walks over to his father and says, “Dad I train Seals, not dolphins.”

What do you get when you mix human DNA and dolphin DNA?
Banned from Sea World.

What’s the difference between a tuna and a piano?
You can’t mistake a dolphin for a piano.

What did the baby dolphin do when he didn’t get his way?
He Whale-d.

Why did the dolphin go to the dentist?
He had an appointment.

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What do dolphins have that no other mammals have?
Baby dolphins.

How do dolphins get high?
Sea weed.

Did you hear about the college for dolphins?
It was for educational porpoises only.

Why do dolphins get so happy when they move into a house?
Because they have a lot of indoor fins.

There was this guy who discovered an old book. He read in one book that dolphins can live indefinitely if fed eagle meat.
Later, he came upon a very sick eagle and reasoned: It’s going to die soon anyhow, so why not take it to the dolphins at the local zoo to see if what’s in the book is true? He went over a wall at night to sneak into the zoo and ended himself right in the lion enclosure! He escaped the lions by jumping over them and climbing up a tree.
He was later arrested and charged with smuggling ill eagle goods over state lions for immortal porpoises.

What is a dolphin’s favorite TV show?
Whale of fortune.

Why did the dolphin take up Buddhism?
Because he was searching for a higher porpoise!

Old MacDonald had a dolphin.

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What do you call a dolphin that never ends?
Dol, cause there’s no “fin.”

Why did the scientist use a drink container to communicate with dolphins?
Because a bottle knows dolphin.

Why was Mr. Dolphin’s bank heist so successful?
Because it was a whale orca-strated plan.

What is a dolphin’s favorite game show?
Whale of Fortune.

Why was the dolphin sent to the electric chair?
He was found guilty of crimes against a manatee.

A whale and a dolphin are eating at a restaurant. When the check comes to the table the dolphin insists on paying. The whale is quite grateful and wants to leave the tip at least but the dolphin respectfully declines.
Later, the whale says, “Thanks if there’s anything you ever need let me know.”
The dolphin replies, “You’re welcome.”
The whale says, “Gross….why would you want that?”

What do a dolphin and a cat with no money have in common?
They’re both a poor puss.

What do you call a parentless dolphin?

What do you call a dolphin in the woods?

Why did the dolphin go to the Tupperware store?
It was looking for a tight seal.

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How does a Dolphin get his lady into a missionary position?

Did you hear about the girl who has a whale tattooed on her ass?
It used to be a dolphin.

What does an army of fire ants have in common with a horny dolphin?
Both come in waves.

Do you have another funny dolphin joke? Post your own Dolphin puns in the comment section below.

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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