Jessica Amlee
Not everyone is impressed with the sunburn giving them off a blush look. Moreover, things particularly get much worse if you slap your sunburn in the process of killing a mosquito. Too much of anything is bad for you. And now you have severe sunburns that feel like your skin is on fire as a result of your long days basking in the sun’s intense rays. Don’t worry, you are not alone in this fight that might go on for more than 10 days. If anything, it shows that you are a slow learner.
We hope that now you avoid the sun, drink plenty of water, and apply ice packs to soothe the pain. While you take home remedies, we have aggregated these funniest sunburn jokes for you to enjoy with your friend and family.
Best Sunburn Jokes
A visitor from out of state fell asleep on the California beach for several hours and received a terrible sunburn specifically, to his upper legs. He went to the hospital and was promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns. With his skin already starting to blister, and the severe pain he was in, the doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours.
The nurse, who was rather astounded, asked, “What good will Viagra do for him, Doctor?”
The doctor replied, “Oh, it won’t do anything for his condition,”… “But it’ll keep the sheets off his legs.”
Why didn’t the daughter get a sunburn?
She can’t you see, she is a daughter and not a son.
Here’s a funny pickup line.
Do you have a sunburn?
Because I think your face is appealing.
What do you call a chicken from Kentucky with sunburn?
KFC.
What do you call a penny with sunburn?
A red cent.
What did the sunburnt manatee say?
Man a tee shirt would be nice.
What do you call a librarian with a sunburn?
Well red.
A husband sunbathes on a nudist beach and gets a sunburn on his weenie.
The same evening he goes to the doctor for some treatment.
His doctor advises him to soak it in a saucer of milk for an hour every day for a week to help.
That night, he decides to give it a shot.
When his wife returns home, she catches him with his dick in a glass of milk and says “Oh! I have always wondered how you reloaded those things.”
What do you call a sunburned pig?
Rare.
What does a pig apply to its nose to prevent sunburn?
Oinkment.
Why didn’t the Gang members get sunburned?
Since wherever they went was really shady.
Recommended: Summer Jokes
What does a sunburned Hawaiian comic put on?
Aloe-Ha!
At the beach, a man was sunbathing naked. He wore a hat over his privates for decorum and to keep them from becoming burnt.
A woman goes by, snickering, and says, “If you were a gentleman, you’d lift your hat.”
“If you weren’t so ugly, it would lift itself,” he replied, raising an eyebrow.
What Could Be Worse Than A Giraffe With a Sore Throat?
A sunburned earthworm.
What’s all black, white, and red all over?
Sunburnt penguin.
What did the pig say on a hot summer day at the beach?
I am bacon!
How can you determine whether someone is a retired French soldier in a room full of nude men?
Ask all to raise their arms above their heads. The ones whose sunburned armpits.
My wife informed me that she needed to soak in a bathtub full of milk to relieve her sunburn.
‘Pasteurized?’ I inquired.
‘No, just up to my neck,’ she replied.
God is arranging his next trip and seeks guidance from St. Peter. “The difficulty is that I don’t know where to go,” God says.
“Well, why don’t you try Mercury?” asks St. Peter. This time of year is supposed to be bright and sunny!”
“No,” God says. “I got the worst sunburn of my life the last time I went to Mercury!”
“How about Pluto?” St. Peter asks. “The snow is very refreshing and enjoyable!”
“No,” God responds. “I shattered my leg snowboarding the last time I went to Pluto.”
“Fine,” St. Peter says. “What about Earth?” A pleasant environment, plenty of company, and the finest burritos in the Solar System!”
“No, not Earth,” God says. “I knocked up some lady the last time I travelled to Earth, and I’ve been hearing about it for 2000 years!”
Why was Steve Irwin’s sunblock lotion recalled?
It didn’t protect against harmful rays.
Yo Mama is so fat she came home from the beach with a sunburn and three harpoon wounds.
Recommended: Yo Mama Jokes
How do pirates deal with sunburn?
ALOE, POPPET.
A new fraud using counterfeit copper tone sunscreen has emerged.
Police are warning the public to read the ingredient list to avoid getting burned.
What do you call if one of your sons is on fire?
Sunburn.
Why do developers favour dark mode?
They don’t want to get sunburned.
What Dinosaur was inherently sunburn resistant?
An Aloesaurus.
When a topless blonde puts sunscreen on a topless brunette, what do you get?
Your camera.
Why do bananas require sunscreen?
Because they peel.
Why do there seem to be so many rednecks in Florida?
Because sunscreen instructions include: “apply liberally.”
What do you call someone who has a severe sunburn?
Appealing.
Why did every letter get sunburned except W, X, Y and Z?
They had UV protection.
Who is the most well-liked guy at the nudist colony?
The sunscreen vendor.
What happens if you get sunburn at the beach?
You become Bernie Sanders.
What do you call a sunburned Canadian?
Dual Citizen.
What do you call a sunburned psychoanalyst?
Pink Freud.
Who takes care of an elephant’s sunburn?
A pachydermatologist.
Why do ginger people sunburn easily?
It’s nature’s way of telling them they should be locked indoors.
Recommended: Ginger Jokes
In Ireland, what do you call sunscreen?
Pubes.
What do you call a sunburned Asian?
Rice Krispy.
Why do black people not get sunburned?
Ain’t no prison outdoors, dawg.
A guy with no arms and no legs and a sunburn?
Bernie.
Can you come up with a better sunburn pun or one-liner? Then leave it in the comments section below.
