60 Funny Fat Puns And One-Liners for Bigger Laughs

In the diverse tapestry of human shapes and sizes, fat individuals often stand out, sometimes facing unjust stereotypes or societal challenges. Yet, it’s important to recognize and celebrate the beauty and individuality in every body type. Being fat doesn’t define a person’s character, abilities, or value; it’s just one of the many aspects that make each of us unique. These people defy gravity with their glorious jiggle, navigate the world like a plush bulldozer, and radiate warmth like a human sun. But fear not, dear reader, for within this roly-poly package lies a secret weapon of mass amusement, the fat pun.

These puns aren’t about mocking; they’re about celebrating life’s larger moments with a wink and a smile. Think of them as a buffet of laughter, where everyone gets their fill. You might hear someone say, “I’m not fat, I’m just easier to see!” or “I’m on a seafood diet—I see food, and I eat it!” These jokes serve up a generous helping of humor, reminding us that laughter is a universal language that transcends size.

Best Fat People Puns

1. Did you hear about the overweight contemplative monk? He was a deep fat friar.
2. What do you call a really fat cow? An un-moo-vable object.
3. Call a girl beautiful 1,000 times and she won’t think twice… Call a girl fat once and she’ll always remember because elephants never forget.
4. My dog is not fat! He’s just husky.
5. What do you call a boy band for fat people? Diabeatles.
6. What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes? Fat. You get fat.
7. What should you reply when a bully asks you ”Why are you so fat? Every time I sleep with your mom, she gives me a cookie.
8. What did one DNA say to another DNA? “Do these genes make me look fat?”
9. If someone calls you Fat, just ignore them. You are bigger than that!
10. What do you call a fat liar sitting down? Quite deceitful.
11. A lot of people are pretty upset about ‘fat shaming’ jokes these days. Maybe they need to lighten up!
12. What happens when you put fat in whiskey? You get butter scotch.
13. I wish I could see what it was like to be fat for just one day. I’m tired of being fat every day.
14. Why are Americans so fat? Because they’re so full of themselves.
15. Fat shaming is wrong. They have enough on their plate already.
16. If you give a pirate a fat booty and a full chest, what does he have? An Arrrrgasm.
17. What do you call a fat pumpkin? A plumpkin.
18. I was going to make a fat joke It didn’t work out.
19. Why couldn’t the fat girl become a hipster? Cause she didnt have skinny genes!
20. What do you call a fat person on a boardwalk? Pier pressure.

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21. Never make fun of a fat girl with a lisp, she’s probably thick and tired of it.
22. Amy Schumer gets mad when people describe her as fat, slutty, and disgusting because she doesn’t like when people steal her material.
23. I bought my wife a Pug as a present. Despite the squashed nose, bulging eyes, and rolls of fat, the dog seems to like her. 
24. Why are people with extra neck fat very daring? Because four chin favors the brave.
25. Finally, my winter fat is gone. Now I have spring rolls!
26. My wife is so fat that when she booked a flight they made her have 2 seats. She was pissed off until I mentioned that she would get 2 meals.
27.  If your partner is overweight, get them to walk 3 miles in the morning and 3 miles in the evening. After 2 weeks the fatto will be 84 miles away!
28. What did the Avacado say to itself in the mirror? You are ‘fat’ but you are ‘good fat’!
29. I am an obese man identifying as a skinny man… I am trans-fat.
30. Not saying my Ex was fat. But it took a year for my memory foam mattress to forget her.
31. Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last long for fat people.
32. I don’t see why in this day and age there aren’t marches against fat shaming. Because marches would definitely solve the problem.
33. Why do witch doctors never get fat? Because they’re always exorcising.
34. If babies are delivered by a stork, then fat babies must be delivered by a crane.
35. Be careful of fat guys, ladies. They just want to get into your pantries.

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36. I was watching a p*rno and it was just this fat dude crying and j*rking off then I realized I hadn’t turned my computer on yet.
37. I went to the doctor today. He told me I was fat. I said I wanted a second opinion. He says, “Okay, you’re ugly.”
38. What do you call a fat Italian Jedi? Obi-Wan Cannoli.
39. My mother-in-law is visiting. I’m not saying she’s fat, but when we hung her panties out to dry, we lost an hour of daylight.
40. My Chinese wife is so fat, she weighs wonton.
41. It doesn’t matter if you’re tall or short, thin or fat, rich or poor, at the end of the day, it’s night.
42. I’m not fat… I’m a roll model.
43. I ran over a fat guy with my car once. It took me a while to get over him.
44. Why did the clock get fat? It kept going for seconds.
45. You can go from fat to fit, with one good vowel movement.
46. I had to leave the pub after my friends called me fat. After we finished our drinks everyone kept saying “You’re round”.
47. Relationships are like fat people, most of them don’t work out.
48. What do you call a fat breakdancer? Hip-hopotamus.
49. I’m fat because I’m full of experiences and most of these experiences involved Mexican food.
50. Today completes 1 year since I started paying at the gym, and I’m still fat. I think I’ll need to go there personally and check what’s wrong.
51. What’s that smoke? Well there is a gym over there, they’re probably just burning fat.
52. My girlfriend used to be a hoe but she got fat, and now she’s a shovel!
53. There’s a fat raccoon on my street. I call “Applebees” ’cause he’s Eatin’ good in the neighborhood!
54. My wife asked me, “Is it just me or is the cat getting fat?” Apparently, “No it’s just you” wasn’t the right answer!
55. Why do significant people tend to be fat? Because the more mass they have, the more they matter.
56. Alcohol doesn’t make you fat. It makes you LEAN.. against tables, chairs, floors, and ugly people.
57. I heard Steven Spielberg is directing a film about a fat alien. It’s called “Eat-T, The Extra Cholesterol”.
58. How did the fat duck die? It had a heartaquack.
59. I am unable to support the “fat-acceptance” movement because they’re too heavy.
60. Why do raccoons get fat? Because their diet is trash.
61. If “fat” is a race, we will be the largest race on Earth.
62. What exercise do fat people do the most? Diddly squats.

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Do you have a funny fat people pun? Write down your own one-liners in the comment section below!