Love is a strange adventure that starts with a smile and slowly turns into a full-time job with feelings, snacks, and mild confusion. It makes people brave enough to care deeply and silly enough to overthink a single message for hours. Love walks into life quietly, trips over expectations, laughs at mistakes, and somehow stays, and that is where jokes step in.
Love jokes step in to help when love itself feels too serious and a little dramatic. They turn awkward moments into light stories, soften big emotions, and remind everyone that laughter is part of caring. As love keeps stumbling forward, love jokes walk beside it, holding its hand, giggling at the chaos, and making the journey feel easier and a lot more fun.
Best Love Jokes
What did the left eye say to the right eye when they got married?
“Eye-do.”
NASA has finally announced what would have happened to the Earth if the moon wasn’t present.
50% fewer poems and love songs.
Two antennas fell in love and got married.
The wedding wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Police.
(Police who?)
Police tell me I’m your type!
Do you know that tingly sensation you get when you fall in love with somebody?
That’s common sense leaving your body.
How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife?
Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.
A man was wholeheartedly in love with his wife, and when she passed after 60 years, he was devastated.
For the next 20 years, he pined and pined and couldn’t wait to rejoin her in heaven. At last, he passed away, and as soon as he landed in heaven, he started running everywhere looking for finally found her. He screams out, “There you are darling, I have missed you so much!”
She stops, stares, and then turns around and begins sprinting in the other direction. “Oh heck no, the contract was only for life!”
Why should you never date a tennis player?
Love means nothing to them.
How do you make a cowgirl fall in love?
A tractor.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Kiss.
(Kiss who?)
Kiss me!
Why did the electrician fall in love with every girl he met?
Because he couldn’t resistor.
Yo mama so fat, she fell in love and broke it.
How do you know if your love interest is into you?
Invite them to the gym. If they show up…then you know you’re working out.
Love is like Coca-Cola, the more you drink…
The closer you get to a broken heart.
A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, “I’ve had enough and have left you. Don’t bother coming after me.”
Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction.
After a short while, the husband comes home, and she can hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom.
She could see him walk towards the dresser and pick up the note.
After a few minutes, he wrote something on it before picking up the phone and calling someone.
“She’s finally gone…yeah I know, about bloody time, I’m coming to see you, put on that cute French nightie.
I love you…can’t wait to see you…we’ll do all the naughty things you like.”
He hung up, grabbed his keys, and left.
She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed.
Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes, she grabbed the note to see what he wrote…
“I can see your feet.
We’re outta bread: be back in five minutes.
Why did the lonely man work on his days off?
He loved the company.
How do you make a Lamborghini?
You get a Sheeporghini and a Ramborghini to fall in love.
Sitting beside his wife, Johnny said, “I love you.”
She said, “Is that you or the beer talking?”
He said, “It’s me talking to the beer.”
It’s easy to fall in love with a taser if it hits you.
They really are quite stunning.
Why was Luke Skywalker unlucky with love?
He was looking in Alderaan places.
A man and a woman meet in heaven and fall in love.
They walk up to God and ask to be married.
God says, “Give me some time and I’ll get back to you.”
Three or four years pass and God finally tells the man and woman that he can have them married.
A few more years pass and the man and woman fall out of love. They approach God once more and this time they ask for a divorce.
God responds, “It took me four years to find a priest in this place. How long do you think it’ll take me to find a lawyer?!”
What did the color say to the other color?
“I love hue.”
Why did the woman fall in love with a lumberjack?
He was a very sappy guy.
What do you say when a ghost falls in love?
Love at First Fright.
Who has two thumbs and loves Peter Pan?
Not Captain Hook.
A popcorn vendor asks the customer whether he would like his popcorn sweet or salty… The customer gazes lovingly at his girlfriend and replies, “I want it like her.”
“Sorry”, says the vendor, “We don’t have ugly popcorn.”
What do you call someone in love with trees?
A leaf-blower.
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a wrench?
Yeah, he was a nut.
A drunk man is walking zig-zag on the road.
A police officer stops him and asks,
“Where are you going at this time?”
The drunk replies, “I’m going to attend a lecture.”
The police officer laughs, “Who gives lectures at midnight?”
The drunk says, “My wife.”
Being in love is like sh*tting in your pants…
Everyone can see it, but only you have that warm feeling.
What made the arsonist fall in love?
He found his perfect match.
Two melons are secretly in love.
The boy melon suggests they run away and get married.
The girl melon says, “I cantaloupe.”
Did you hear about the lady who fell in love with a ginger ale salesman?
She was schwepped off her feet!
What do you call someone with a sweet-tooth who is in love with you?
A candy crush.
Did you hear about the two blood cells that met and fell in love?
Alas, it was all in vein.
A therapist has a theory that couples who make love once a day are the happiest.
So he decides to test this theory. He convenes all the couples he can find at a special seminar.
He then starts by asking many people in the audience.
“How many people here make love once a day?”
Half the people raise their hands, each of them grinning widely.
“Once a week?”
A third of the audience members raise their hands, their grins a bit less vibrant.
“How many of you make love once a month?”
A few hands tepidly go up. No grins could be sighted.
“OK, how about once a year?”
To his shock, one man in the back jumps up and down, jubilantly waving his hands and whistling. The therapist is shocked – this man’s reaction completely disproves his theory!
“If you make love only once a year,” he asks, “why are you so happy?”
The man shouts, “Today’s my birthday!”
The Bible and the Quran tell us to love each other.
The Kamasutra is more specific.
Recommended: Romantic Jokes
Did you hear about the two loaves of bread that fell in love?
They decided to raise some dough, put a bun in the oven, and grow mold together.
How did the mathematician propose to his love interest?
“You’re my angle.”
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Muffin.
(Muffin who?)
Muffin in this world can keep us apart.
What do you call someone who is in love with a skeleton?
A hopeless nec-romantic.
Wife: “Would you love me if my father hadn’t left me a fortune?”
Husband: “No, I’d love you whoever had left you the fortune!”
A guy falls in love with a very traditional and conservative girl, which means no physical relations before marriage. But he doesn’t care; he loves her. After a year or two of dating, he decides it’s time to propose. So he heads to her father’s house to ask his permission.
“Hello, sir, I’m here to ask for your daughter’s hand.”
A bit skeptical and looking to see if he really does love her, the father asks, “And why is that?”
The guy lets out a long, drawn-out sigh… “Well, it’s just that mine have gotten tired.”
Wife said, “If you won the lottery, would you still love me?”
Husband replied, “Of course I would. I’d miss you, but I’d still love you.”
“Describe your love life in two words.”
“My what?”
Who should a pirate fall in love with?
His soul matey!
Recommended: Best Valentine’s Day Jokes
“Do you believe in love at first sight?
Or do I have to walk by again?”
What do you call two track runners in love?
A long distance relaytionship.
A man wakes up after a night of drinking to see a single red rose on his bedside table.
Beside the rose is a glass of water, two Advil, and a note from his wife. The note says, “Hi honey, the pills are for your headache. When you’re ready, come down to the kitchen and I’ll fix your favorite breakfast. Love you!”
He also notices that he is still in the clothes he was wearing last night and that they aren’t very comfortable.
He goes down to the kitchen to find his wife humming happily to herself and dancing around in her apron. Upon seeing her husband, she dances up to him and gives him a loving kiss, and says, “Go wait in the dining room. Breakfast will be ready soon!”
So he goes and waits in the dining room. The man’s son is also sitting there. He quietly asks his son, “Hey, do you know what’s up with mom?”
The boy looked up and said, “Well dad do you remember coming home drunk last night? You were pretty out of it. You went upstairs and crawled into bed with mom. Well, you were still in your jeans and shirt, and mom didn’t think that was very comfortable so she decided to help you get undressed for bed. She couldn’t, though, because every time she tugged on your shirt, you would push her away and yell ‘get off me, lady! I’m married!”
We thought it was our ability to love that made us human,
But it turns out it was actually our ability to SELECT EACH IMAGE CONTAINING A CAR.
What do you call someone who is loved unconditionally?
A dog maybe.
Eating spicy food is like expressing your love to someone who has no interest in you…
You always get burned in the end.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Needle.
(Needle who?)
I needle little love right now.
Why are fish bad at dating?
There’s plenty of fish in the sea, but love is in the air.
What did the Russian spy fall in love with an FBI director for?
His intelligence.
Recommended: Valentine’s Day Jokes for Adults
A young man was in love with two women and could not decide which of them to marry. Finally, he went to a marriage counselor. When asked to describe his two loves, he noted that one was a great poet and the other made delicious pancakes…
“Oh,” said the counselor. “I see what the problem is. You can’t decide whether to marry for batter or verse.”
Did you hear about the two bells that fell in love?
You couldn’t peal them apart.
Why did the duck fall in love with the dog?
He was pure bread.
Our daughter’s name is Love, but my parents hate that name.
My mom said, “Darling, you gave Love a bad name.”
Why did the two aging paints fall in love?
They found each other very appealing.
A guy was admitted to the hospital, and he fell in love with the nurse.
She used to take care of him and was very nice to him. Always checking up on him and giving him extra attention compared to other patients. Therefore, the guy thought that the nurse was into him as well.
The guy was shy and couldn’t ask the nurse out on a date. But after he was discharged, he somehow managed to get the number of the nurse and messaged her: “Hi, I’m the patient you looked after. I’ve been thinking about it, and I think you’ve stolen my heart”.
The nurse didn’t reply for two days, and the patient was sure that he wouldn’t be getting any reply from her.
Then out of the blue, she replied: ” Whatever you are accusing me of is not true. We only took one kidney out.”
What’s the difference between love, true love, and showing off?
Spit, swallow, gargle.
Trust an overthinker when they tell you they love you.
They’ve already thought of every reason to not love you.
Where do mermaids go to make sweet love?
The seabed.
Recommended: Valentine’s Day Jokes for Kids
If an Italian gives you an eel, it means they love you.
That’s a moray.
If doom is eternal and halo is infinite, what is love?
Baby don’t hurt me…
“Would you still love me if I lost all my hair?” she said.
“Of course, I would, dear,” he replied.
“And what if I lost my ears? Would you love me?”
“As much as ever, honey.”
“What if I lost both my arms?”
“Even then, dumpling.”
“What if I lost all my toes?”
“Yuck, no!!”
“What?!?”
“Babe, you know I’m lack-toes intolerant.”
Why can’t astronomers fall in love?
All their relationships are plutonic.
What’s the closest synonym to a love boat?
A relation-ship.
Why was the rectangle in love with a triangle?
She has acute angle.
Which fruit is the most often love-struck?
A PINEapple.
What did one nose say when the other nose said, “I love you”?
“Back achoo!”
A couple decided to go on vacation to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, the husband left and flew to out a day before his wife, who would fly in the following day. The husband checked into the hotel. There was a public computer available, so he decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.
Meanwhile, somewhere else in the country, a widow had just returned home from her husband’s funeral. The widow decided to check her email, expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted. The widow’s son rushed into the room and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I’ve arrived
Date: October 16, 2010
I know you’re surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I’ve just been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. Sure is hot down here
Recommended: Valentine’s Day Dad Jokes
What do you call two Kia’s that have found true love?
SOUL-mates.
Did you hear about the 2 golf courses that fell in love?
It was a lawn distant relationship.
What did the digital clock say to its mother?
“I love you, mom, every second of the day!”
Love is like a Ghost Pepper, you taste it with delight.
And when it’s gone you wonder, what ever made you bite.
Do you have a love joke? Write down your best jokes in the comment section below!
My life is like a romantic comedy…
except there’s no romance and I’m the only one who laughs at my jokes.