75 Funny Beer Jokes And Puns to Start Your Brew-tiful Day

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Jessica Amlee


Beer jokes are a staple of comedy, and for good reason: beer is a beloved beverage that is enjoyed by millions of people around the world. Whether you’re a fan of light lagers or hoppy IPAs, there’s a beer joke out there for everyone. From witty one-liners to clever puns, beer jokes are a great way to lighten the mood and share a laugh with friends.

Whether you’re at a bar, a party, or just hanging out with friends, beer jokes are a great way to break the ice and get everyone in a jovial mood. So, if you’re looking for a good laugh, grab a cold one and get ready for some hilarious beer-related humor.

Best Beer Jokes

What do you get when you pour root beer into a square glass?
A beer.

What’s God’s favorite beer?
Busch Light.

How does a carpenter order 5 beers?
With 2 hands.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Brew who?)
Brew-hoo! Don’t cry, we’ll get you another beer!

Wanna know the real reason nobody is buying corona beer after this pandemic?
They don’t want any cases.

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to grow a root beer garden.

What did the soccer fan say when the beer ran out?
Damn, this game is boring.

Why do one legged people like beer?
Because it’s made with hops.

How does the Jewish man make beer?

How do you stop a Mormon from drinking all your beer?
Invite a second Mormon.

How do you make a whale float?
Two scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a whale.

Do you know that Beer makes you lean?
On walls, toilet, and refrigerators.

Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.

Recommended: Bud Light Jokes

What kinds of beer makes you urinate vowels?

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Ale who?)
Ale be back for another beer soon!

What did the skeleton order with his beer?
A mop.

Did you hear about the guy that walked into a bar with a chunk of asphalt under his arm?
He asked the bartender for a beer, and one for the road.

What kind of beer does a vampire drink?

Why do frogs taste like beer?
They’re full of hops.

A man walks into a pub and orders three beers. The bartender raises his eyebrows but serves the man three beers, which he drinks quietly at a table, alone.
An hour later, the man has finished the three beers and orders three more. This happens yet again. The next evening the man again orders and drinks three beers at a time, several times.
Finally, a week later, the bartender broaches the subject, “I don’t mean to pry, but folks around here are wondering why you always order three beers.”
“‘Tis odd, isn’t it?” the man replies. “You see, I have two brothers, and one went to America, and the other to Australia. We promised each other that we would always order an extra two beers whenever we drank as a way of keeping up the family bond.”
The bartender and the whole town were pleased with this answer, and soon the Man Who Orders Three Beers became a local celebrity and source of pride to the hamlet, even to the extent that out-of-towners would come to watch him drink.
Then, one day, the man comes in and orders only two beers. The bartender pours them with a heavy heart. This continues for the rest of the evening — he orders only two beers. Word flies around town. Prayers are offered for the soul of one of the brothers.
The next day, the bartender says to the man, “Folks around here, me first of all, want to offer condolences to you for the death of your brother. You know — the two beers and all…”
The man ponders this for a moment, then replies, “You’ll be happy to hear that my two brothers are alive and well. It’s just that I, meself, have decided to give up drinking for Lent.”

What if the helium goes to the bar?
Helium walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve nobles here.” Helium does not react.

What do you call a red headed beer?
A Ginger Ale!

Recommended: Ginger Jokes

Do you know that drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your sister?
It tastes the same but it’s just not right.

How many beers does it take to get an exotic bird drunk?

Why can’t the guy who does inventory for Lipton go out and have a beer after work?
Because he is a tea totaller.

What do you call a beer in the freezer?
A polar beer.

Why is there no beer in Minecraft?
Because everyone is a miner.

What’s Sysiphus’ favorite beer?
Rolling Rock!

Tips for success in starting a beer business.
Step 1: Start a beer company named Responsibly.
Step 2: Watch as every other beer company promotes you for free at the end of their commercials.
Step 3: Enjoy your yacht.

What’s the best beer for Easter?
Double IPA because of the extra hops.

What kind of beer do spiders drink?
Bug lite.

How do they serve beer in Cinco de Mayo?
In Mexi-cans.

Recommended: Mexican Jokes

What is a tree’s favorite drink?
Root beer.

Why is beer never served at a math party?
Because you can’t drink and derive.

Why do rockers drink beer from cans?
Because they like metal!

Why do mathematicians need to drink beer to dance?
It helps them find their lager rhythm.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Hop who?)
Hop on over and let’s share a beer together!

Did you hear about the beer that now includes caffeine?
It gets you hopped up.

What’s a woodsman’s favorite beer?
A lager.

What kinda beer do pirates be drinkin’?

Where do farmers drink beer?
In the Hoegaarden.

What do you call a dinosaur that drinks beer?
A Kegasaurus Rex!

Son: What’s that fancy beer mug on the mantle?
Mom: That’s your uncle Frank. That’s where he wanted his remains. It was his favorite beer stein. He always said it would be funny, I never understood why.
Son: So he could be Frank in Stein?
Mom: Son of a b###h!

What do you call a bad beer?

Where do they brew beer in just 4 weeks?
At the Feb-rewery.

Why did the IT guy call his beer “F5”?
Because it’s refreshing!

What do you call an extra terrestrial who only drinks beer?
An ALEien!

Did you know beer makes you smarter?
It made Budweiser.

Which beer goes best with family feud?

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Bud who?)
Budweiser, the King of Beers!

What do you name a two-pack of beer?

What did the wine tell the beer can before leaving for a long vacation?
“Alcohol you later!!!”

Have you heard about Japanese beer that no one can ever make?
It’s impossibrew!

What do you call a bad beer?

What’s an insect’s favorite beer?

What’s Chewbacca’s favorite brand of beer?
My Wookiee’s Best.

A man walks into a bar and says, “Give me a beer before the problems start!”
He drinks the beer and then orders another saying, “Give me a beer before the problems start!”
The bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man, “When are you going to pay for these beers?”
The man answers, “Now the problems start!”

Did you hear about the guy who spilled his beer while riding a dolphin?
He claims he spilled his beer on porpoise.

What is Frosty’s favorite beer?
Magic hat.

What do a giraffe and beer have in common?
They both have long necks.

What’s the difference between a dog and a fox?
About six beers.

What did the German physicist use to drink his beer?
Ein stein.

What is the difference between an Irish drinking song and a Country drinking song?
You don’t cry in your beer when the Irish song is playing.

Recommended: Irish Jokes

What kind of soda do dogs drink?
Barq’s Root Beer.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Sherwood who?)
Sherwood like a cold beer.

What kind of beer does a cow brew?

Why should you always give kids soda before they go swimming?
Because Root beer floats!

Why did the snail drink beer?
To come out of its shell!

What’s the difference between beer and weed?
Five drunk people will start a fight whereas five stoned people will start a band.

What is the least popular Russian beer?

What is an orphan’s favorite beer?

What does the “A&W” in A&W Restaurant stand for?
Amburgers and Woot Beer!

Recommended: Alabama Jokes

What do a burned pizza, a frozen beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone didn’t pull out in time.

Why is American beer a lot like s#x on a canoe?
It’s fcuking close to water.

Why don’t women drink beer on the nude beach?
Cause they’ll get sand in their Schlitz!

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None, it should be open by the time she brings it.

Do you have a funny beer joke? Post your own beer puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

2 thoughts on “75 Funny Beer Jokes And Puns to Start Your Brew-tiful Day”

  1. The girl I brought home last weekend didn’t seem impressed by my collection of beer commercials
    Apparently, she’d misunderstood when I told her I had six-pack ads


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