Festivals in Islam are based on the lunar calendar, which is approximately 11 days shorter than the solar calendar, which is used by the majority of the globe. The Islamic calendar is based on a 12-month lunar calendar, therefore the dates of both Eids vary from year to year, although Eid al-Adha is always a little more than two months after Eid al-Fitr.
On both Eids, many Muslims will attend special prayers at their local mosque before spending the day celebrating with family and friends. This year Eid-Ul-Fitr begins on Monday, May 2nd, 2022, and ends on Tuesday, May 3rd, 2022 while Eid-Al-Adha begins on the evening of Saturday, July 9th, 2022 and ends in the evening of Sunday, July 10th, 2022. Here are the funniest Eid jokes for you to enjoy with your friends and family.
Best Eid Jokes
Non-Muslim Friend: Hey bro! What is Eid?
Muslim: In simple terms, Eid is basically the Muslim Met Gala.
What’s similar between puberty and Eid?
Girls get collectively pimples in both.
Why was the goat scared of Eid?
Someone told it to spell ‘Eid” backwards.
How do you know Eid is around the corner?
When your house starts smelling like a bakery.
What would you call a gathering of butchers on Eid?
It’s a meating.
Why do boys stalk girls on social media around Eid?
They wait for her to post a pic of her dad to know who to talk to in the mosque.
Muslim Vegan: People who sell meat are horrible.
Friend: Well, people who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer.
What kind of meat is the cheapest on Bakrid?
Deer balls; it’s under a buck!
When an Imam declared shortly after Eid-ul-Adha congregational prayer that he was retiring from that particular Masjid and transferring to a drier environment, he stunned his community. After the session, a tearful lady approached the Imam and said, “Oh, Imam, we are going to miss you very badly.” “We don’t want you to go!” “Now, now, sister, don’t go on,” the gentle Imam advised. The Imam who takes my position may be better than I am.”
“Yeah,” she said, her voice disappointed, “that’s what they said the last time too… “
Recommended: Eid al-Fitr Memes
What type of meat do fathers buy who have abandoned their children?
On Eid, why did the camel cross the street?
She wanted to get to the Adha side.
How do you stop a goat from charging?
Try unplugging it.
On Eid, what did the butcher say when he gave the wrong meat order?
“I’m sorry for the mis-steak”.
What did the bored goat say on Eid Al-Adha?
Where did the butcher and his wife meet?
At the Meat ball.
How come on Eid al-Adha all the sheep went to sleep?
It was pasture bedtime.
The inhabitants of the city once invited Mulla Nasruddin to give a speech on the occasion of Eid. When he arrived at the minbar (pulpit), he discovered that the audience was uninterested, so he questioned, “Do you know what I am going to say?” When the crowd replied, “No,” he said, “I have no desire to speak to people who don’t even know what I will be talking about,” and he left. People were ashamed, so they called him again the next day. When he posed the same question again, the people said “Yes.” Mullah Nasruddin then stated, “Well, because you already know what I’m going to say, I won’t spend any more of your time,” and he went. The people were now completely bewildered.
They decided to give it another shot and invited the Mullah to speak the following week. He posed the same question again: “Do you know what I’m going to say?” Because the people were prepared, half of them said “Yes,” while the other half said “No.” So Mullah Nasruddin remarked, “Tell the other half what I’m going to say,” and then he departed!
Why did the husband keep a large number of goats in his garden?
He was working on something his wife recently said,” In order to make a relationship work, you have to make a lot of sacrifices.”
Why do goats find it difficult to make friends?
They always butt heads.
Recommended: Eid al-Adha Memes
What is the cringiest pickup line ever on Eid?
Hey! I just saw the moon in your eyes, Eid Mubarak.
On Eid, what did the butcher say to the pig?
Nice to meat you.
In Spanish, how do you wish a sheep Eid Mubarak?
On Eid, a Muslim man told his wife that she needed to start embracing her mistakes.
So she gave him a hug.
An elderly lady was well-known for her Iman and her belief in discussing it. She would stand in front of her house and greet everyone who passed by with Alhamdulilah, which means “Allah be praised.” Next door to her resided an atheist who would become enraged by her declarations and exclaim, “There ain’t no Lord!!” When the old lady had difficulties, she prayed to Allah to send her support during Eid. In her night prayers, she would pray aloud “Oh my God! I’m hungry!! I’m struggling; please, Lord, please send me some groceries!!”
The atheist happened to overhear her praying and decided to pull a joke on her. The lady went out on her porch the next morning and noticed a large bag of groceries and cried, “Alhamdulilah, Allah be praised!” The neighbour emerged from behind a bush and exclaimed, “Aha! I told you there was no such thing as a Lord. God did not buy those groceries.” The lady began leaping up and down and clapping her hands, saying, “Thank you and Shukrillah.” He didn’t just send me groceries; he made the devil pay for them!”
What farm animal is in trouble during Bakrid?
What did the goat say on the day of sacrifice?
Kar chale hum fida Jaan-O-Tan Saathiyon, ab tumhare hawale mutton sathiyo.
Here’s the account of an Imam who stood up after Friday prayers and declared to the congregation:
“I have both good and bad news. The good news is that we have adequate funds to cover our new construction programme. The bad news is that it’s still in your pockets.”
On Eid al Adha, what did one beef sausage say to the other beef sausage?
What do Muslims name the early call to Eid namaz that wakes them up in the morning?
The Allahm clock.
We hope you like our collection of jokes and puns this Eid. Have a better one? Let us know in the comment section below!