75 Mole Day Jokes And Puns For Chemists

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Jessica Amlee

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Mole Day is celebrated and observed every year on October 23 by chemists, chemistry enthusiasts, and chemistry students around the world. This day is unique in that it is observed from 6:02 a.m. until 6:02 p.m., resulting in the date 6:02 10/23, representing the Avogadro Number which is the number of atoms in exactly 12 grams of carbon-12 (one mole). Also, it was founded by the National Mole Day Foundation on 15th May 1991.

For those who are perplexed, it is a fundamental unit of chemistry, not those strange-looking animals known as moles. Recent celebrations have included making and eating guacamole, playing “CornMOLE,” and creating groan-worthy memes and jokes. Mole Day now seeks to be, as Delaware Science teacher Margaret Christoph defined it 37 years ago, “a way for students to find out that chemistry can be exciting, rewarding, and fun.”

Funny Mole Jokes

What animal has exactly 12 grams of carbon?
A mole.

Avogadro’s Number walks into the CIA.
One of the spies responds, “Gentlemen, we have a mole.”

What does a millennial mole eat for breakfast?
Avogadro toast.

Why do moles live underground?
Because they’re ugly.

Blackbeard is in the bath and he finds 10 new moles on his back.
Being a health-conscious pirate, he books an appointment with his dermatologist to get them checked out. The dermatologist takes a look and says “Well, cap’n, I’ve done a thorough examination and I’m pretty sure they’re benign”
Blackbeard replies “Arrrrrr, can ye check again? I’m sure there be ten!”

What is a mole’s favorite element?
42 Mole-ybdenum.

Has anyone played that weird Mexican carnival game where groundhogs pop out of holes and you have to smear them with avocado?
I really suck at Guac-a-mole.

Do you remember that mole who goes into a club?
He ended up getting Avogadro’s number.

Look down a mole hole, what do you see?

What do you call the crude, nonreligious inside jokes that moles tell each other during chemistry class?
Inter-mole-secular farces.

What do you call someone who has 6.02 * 10^23 dollars?
A mole-ionaire.

What do you call a stripping chemist?
A mole dancer!

Why did the 22140857×10^23 molecules of Methyl Acetate go to jail?
It was a Mole-Ester!

What’s Avagodro’s favorite type of dip?

What’s Avogadro’s favorite arcade game?
Wack a mole.

How can you tell if someone is a chemistry major?
They have a mole on their body.

Why was the guy getting his Darth Vader-shaped mole checked out?
He is concerned because it’s on the dark side.

What’s the slowest-moving body part in the entire animal kingdom?
Mole Asses.

What do you call a mole that doesn’t feel pain?
A Paracetamole.

Remember the guy who hated his mole?
But now it’s growing on him.

Why was Avogadro executed?
He was a mole.

What do you get when you have a mole getting high from smoking rooster feathers?
A mole lit off c*ck tails.

What did the diabolical mole say when he finished digging up the entire yard?
“So….” -rubs paws together- “The plot thickens.”

Why did the mole doctor lose his job?
Medical mole-practice.

A mama mole, a papa mole, and a baby mole all live in a little mole hole.
One day the papa mole sticks his head out of the hole, sniffs the air, and says, “Yum! I smell maple syrup!”
The mama mole sticks her head out of the hole, sniffs the air, and says “Yum! I smell honey!”
The baby mole tries to stick his head out of the hole to sniff the air, but can’t because the bigger moles are in the way so he says, “Geez, all I smell is MOLASSES!”

What did the mole go as for Halloween?

Recommended: Halloween Jokes

What do you call 6.022 x 10^23 molecules of avocado?
A guac-mole.

Why shouldn’t you joke about Molestations?
“How else would the Moles get to work?”

How are mole children punished for disobeying their parents?
They are abovegrounded.

Why do moles love Albert Einstein?
Because he helped create the very first model of a wormhole.

How do you stop a mole from digging?
Take his shovel away.

What is the prettiest condiment?

What’s a gay mole’s favorite thing?

If a mole working within the FBI were to come up with a joke what kind would it be?
An inside joke.

What type of coffee do moles like?
Any type of ground coffee.

What is the best way to match-make for moles?
Get them to play tennis. With their poor eye sight and short arms, you’ll instantly have endless love.

What should a mole bride wear?
Something burrowed.

How do moles connect to the Internet?
It’s hard to get broadband underground, so they still use mole-dems.

Which hairstyle do glam metal moles have?
A mole-et!

What do you call a mole with no legs?
A rolly moley.

Recommended: No Arms No Legs Jokes

Sherlock Holmes: My dear Watson, you have a mole on your right upper thigh.
Watson (Amazed): Yes! How did you know?
Holmes: Simple my dear Watson, you forgot to put on your pants.

What did the people say when a mole was elected as pope?
Holey moley!

What do you call it when someone hits avocados repeatedly with a hammer?

What does the Pope order in a Mexican restaurant?
Holy mole.

How many moles do you think they have to kill to get a whole jar of molasses?
6 x 10^23.

What’s a horny mole’s favorite sweetener?

What is a mole’s favorite amusement?
A mole-a-coaster!

Why wasn’t the mole allowed to join the secret service?
They thought he was a mole. And they were right.

Why are moles always broke?
Because they know: Mole money. Mole problems.

Why was the mole so happy when he got suspended from school?
Because his mom said he was grounded too.

How are moles classified?
They are Mamoles in the Animole kingdom.

Boy: How are you?
Girl: I’m fine.
Boy: So what’s your favorite color?
Girl: Ohh please stop asking stupid questions. Ask me something logical and mature.
Boy: How many moles of Sodium bicarbonate are needed to neutralize 0.8 ml of Sulphuric Acid at STP…
Girl: My favorite color is pink.

What kind of weatherman does a mole use?
A seis-mole-ogist!

What do you call it when something blocks your vision of a mole?
A molar eclipse!

What’s essential for a mole wedding?
Something burrowed.

What’s a mole’s favorite number?

What’s Pac-Mans favorite condiment?

Where does a mole jot down his ideas?
In his Humanskine notebook.

At what time does a mole do its best work?

What do you call burrowing underground for grubs and worms while maintaining an aura of astounding awesomeness?
That’s just the standard moledus operandi.

Did you hear about the mole who went into politics?
He got elected to the burrow council.

What did the mole find in the volcano?
Mole-ten lava.

So there’s this doctor who was the best in his field. He got top marks in his university degree and went on to complete the highest honors. His parents were so proud of him as they themselves owned a hotel and were glad to see their son was doing as well, it not better than they did.
One day the father of the doctor fell ill and as his wife was a weak elderly lady, the doctor had no choice but to take over the family hotel business. He had no idea how to run a 5-star hotel so he stared at the bottom. He worked at the counter!
A week later, one of his regular clients Thomas came into the hotel with his best friend who happened to be a mole. The Doctor recognized him instantly and said, “Thomas, are you here for a trip?” “Well, f*ck me dead….do you work here now”? Thomas replied. “Yes, so it is one room or two rooms”? The Mole had come down with a terrible Flu so Thomas replied, “Two Rooms please!”
They checked in and spent the next week having the time of their life! They went sightseeing, dancing, and even mini Golf! MOLE IN ONE!
The end of their trip was here and Thomas went to the counter with the Mole who was still quite unwell. Thomas paid for his room and was about to leave when the Mole followed behind him still coughing quite violently.
The Doctor shouted, “Hey Thomas, you really need to get that Mole checked out!”

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What did the thirsty mole say when she heard about the three holes in the ground that were filled with water?
Well, well, well…!

How long did it take Avogrado to find a girlfriend?
A MOLE-ennium.

Having mole problems?
Call out specialist Avogadro at 602-1023.

Did you hear about the new research lab that’s crossbreeding rodents and fish?
Modern science is pretty fin-on-a-mole.

Why should freckles be under tight security?
One of them may be a mole.

What’s the difference between a strip club and a molehill?
In a molehill, the hose makes it rain.

What kept the mole in bed for two straight months?

Why did the mole win the golf tournament?
Because he got a mole-in-one.

Why does a mole like petroleum?
‘S oil.

Why was the mole worried about going to the dermatologist?
He thought he might be moleignant.

Recommended: Periodic Table Jokes

Why did the mole break a nail?
It hit rock bottom.

What happened to the mole who found a mosquito?
He got mole-aria.

Have a better joke about mole? Let us know your best mole puns in the comment below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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