30 Funny Christmas Cat Jokes And Puns Fur You Right Meow

Created on:

Jessica Amlee


Cats during Christmas time become an amusing part of the holiday festivities. These curious and playful creatures often find the Christmas decorations irresistible. From batting at the hanging ornaments to climbing the Christmas tree, cats add their own brand of mischief and charm to the holiday season. Their antics around the festive decor can turn a well-arranged Christmas setting into a playground, much to the amusement (or sometimes dismay) of their owners. The image of a cat tangled in tinsel or pawing at a dangling bauble has become a humorous symbol of the holiday’s domestic joys and chaos.

Cats are a must-have in any Christmas atmosphere. Their fluffy presence gives a touch of warmth and charm to the holiday season. But, let’s face it, these four-legged companions aren’t exactly known for their Christmas spirit. They’d rather be seen bashing ornaments from the tree or resting blissfully in wrapping paper than singing songs or helping to decorate the house. And that’s precisely where Christmas Cat Jokes come in. These hilarious puns and one-liners capture the mischievous spirit of felines during the holidays, reminding us that even though they may not always be helpful, they always know how to make us laugh.

Best Christmas Cat Jokes

What’s the scientific name of a Christmas cat?
Felis Navidad.

What religion does a cat practice?

Did you hear about the kid who wanted a cat for Christmas?
His dad said, “I was going to cook a turkey, but hey, whatever makes them happy.”

Why do cats climb Christmas trees?
They should be afraid of the BARK.

What does a cat like to drink on Christmas?

If dogs always have a rough day, what do cats have?
Cats always have a meowy Christmas.

This cat has been nibbling on the Christmas tree.
Now she’s coughing up fir balls.

A Frenchman was attacked by a cat on Christmas.
Now he is Claude.

What do you call an avalanche of cats in winters?
A catastrophe.

A man really disliked his wife’s cat, especially around Christmas. One day, while his wife was busy decorating, he secretly put the cat in his car and dropped it off at the end of the snowy street. When he returned, he found the cat cozily sitting by the fireplace.
Unbelieving, he then took the cat far across the city, through the bustling Christmas markets, and left it there. Yet, when he got home, the cat was batting at the Christmas tree ornaments.
In a last attempt, the man took the cat, drove across the city, over the icy river, past the woods, and through several snowy towns before leaving it.
Hours later, as his wife was baking Christmas cookies, the phone rang. It was her husband: “Is the cat there?” he asked. “Yes, he’s just knocked over the Christmas stockings,” she replied. “Well, put him on the phone,” he said, “I’m lost!”

Recommended: Christmas Knock Knock Jokes

The next day, the man goes to Home Depot and asks the tool department manager why he was suddenly confident and successful. “Obviously,” said the man, “You had Lowe’s Elf Steam.”

What holiday favorite treat can you place under the Christmas Tree to keep the cats away?
Peppermint Bark.

Have you heard about Schrödinger’s Christmas cat?
It’s on Santa’s list as both naughty and nice at the same time!

How do Christmas cats plan their holiday mischief?
They start from ‘scratch’ plotting under the mistletoe and around the Christmas tree!

Where does a cat go when it loses its tail during holidays?
To the Bronner’s Christmas Wonderland for a festive new one!

Husband and wife are putting up Holiday decorations.
When the husband offers to hang the wreath. “But sweetums, you are inept and you have no tools,” says the wife. Husband shrugs and goes to Lowe’s to buy a hammer. He walks past a display for the new, Elf Steam Multi-Tool. The marketing was brilliant and it had a drill, three saws, and a sander – all working on steam power. He buys the tool hoping his wife will finally have confidence in his abilities.
When he gets home and hangs the wreath, he puts a hole in the wall, knocks over the bookcase, and raises the ire of his wife. “Take that stupid tool back. I will ask my father to put up the wreath.” The man shrugs, “Aww honey, I can do the job. The new tool is defective.” So he goes back to Lowe’s and instead of getting a different tool, is talked into replacing it with an upgraded Elf Steam. Great marketing.
The man gets home and creates more disasters with the tool. He breaks a window, gouges the floor, scares the cat who knocks over the Christmas tree, and his wife is enraged. “You fool! Take that Elf Steam back. My dad will be here after dinner to clean up your disaster!”
The sulking man drives back to Lowe’s, returns it, and goes across the street to the Home Depot. Yet again he is convinced to purchase another Elf Steam.
But this time when he gets home, thanks to the new tool, he fixes the holes in the wall, replaces the window, hangs the wreath, refinishes the floor, puts up the tree, grooms the cat, builds new bookshelves, all in one day. The man feels unstoppable. His wife is so proud. His father-in-law is impressed.

Where do cats learn to clean themselves?
At a Cat Lick school.

Why was the cat arrested by Santa’s elves?
For ‘littering’ tinsel all over the North Pole!

Recommended: All I Want For Christmas Is You Memes

What do cats ask Santa for breakfast?
Mice Krispies.

Who delivers a Christmas cat’s mail?
Santa Paws with USPSPSPSPS.

On Christmas Eve, a cat walks into a bar.
The bartender, dressed as Santa, asks, “What’ll you have?” The cat says, “A cup of eggnog.” Santa-bartender pours the drink, and the cat slowly pushes the cup off the counter.
“Another, please!”

Why are cats such good bakers?
They have built-in whiskers.

It’s raining like cats and dogs on Christmas Eve,
Hope it doesn’t continue till Christmas, or it’s gonna rain deer.

How do cats celebrate Christmas?
With Sandy Claws.

Kid: Mom, can I have a cat for Christmas this year?
Mother: No, you’ll have turkey like the rest of us.

A cat and a reindeer were having a holiday debate on who is a human’s favorite. The reindeer says, “Humans adore us more. They even have mentioned us in their Christmas songs!”
The cat smiles and says, “You’re not really going to win this one you know.”

Recommended: Naughty Christmas Jokes for Adults

Studies show that atheists are more likely to own cats than Christians.
Because owning Christians isn’t legal, obviously.

Why did the cat run from the Christmas tree?
Because it was afraid of the bark!

What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo?
An eskimew!

Do you have a funny cat joke about Christmas? Write down the puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

2 thoughts on “30 Funny Christmas Cat Jokes And Puns Fur You Right Meow”

Leave a Comment