Inflation is the technical term for price increases over time and a decrease in buying power. Think of a trip to the grocery store and all the things you can buy in 100 dollars. A year from now, if you buy all the same items, they will cost a hundred and three dollars. That’s inflation and three percent to be exact. If you do an in-depth understanding of this demon, you will learn that it is supposed to harm those who save money and workers with fixed earnings. Meanwhile, it will help people with huge debts because rising prices will make it easier for them to repay their loans. For those who are in pain, we have compiled a list of Inflation jokes to help you lighten the mood.
As of June 2022, we are experiencing global inflation with the US (8.6%), the UK (9%), Canada (7%), Germany (7.9%), and India (7.04%) being the most hit among the top economies. The inflation rates in the US and UK are the highest in 4 decades. Hopefully, the governments with their central banks will see it through till we read these funny puns on rising prices.
Best Inflation Jokes
How do you explain inflation to a 6-year-old?
In my day, I’d buy a doll with 1 tooth from the tooth fairy. Today, that same doll will cost you 5 teeth.
How can inflation actually help you?
Well, it can if your keep your account in the negatives.
Why are there so many jokes about inflation these days?
Because demand has increased following a period of low interest.
What is transitory inflation?
It’s similar to regular inflation but with twenty percent more lies.
How high is inflation?
Enough to use a broomstick to commute around.
What’s a funny saying among economists about inflation?
By the time you can finally make ends meet, inflation moves the ends.
How can you notice inflation in daily life?
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.
How did a Chartered Accountant explain Inflation to his wife?
You used to be a 36-24-36, but now you’re a 46-40-48. So, theoretically, you have more than you did before, but your value is lower. This, my dear, is called inflation.
A man was having an evening walk with his friend. After a while, he says to his friend, “I am a walking economy.”
“How so?” asks his friend.
“My hairline is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation and both of these together are putting me into a deep depression.”
A young boy goes to his father in India.
“Papa, might I please have 10 rupees?” the youngster pleads. Papa is taken aback and inquires “20 rupees? Why do you require 60 rupees?”
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Why is Apple the most futuristic company among all?
They’ve already accounted for the next 50 years of inflation!
Why have a majority of men started loving their own wives?
Inflation and financial crisis.
What if you had a dime for every girl who found you unattractive?
They will eventually find you attractive due to inflation.
What do you call 50 Cent in Zimbabwe?
Eighty million dollars
A man decided to take advantage of the growing science of cryogenics i.e, the science of freezing people up so that they can be in deep freeze for a time and then restored to life. So, he got himself put into the deep freeze for 20 years but before he went into it, he left all his securities and his worldly belongings at his brokers with instructions to do the best he could for him.
20 years later, After the deep freeze, the first thing he did was to run to the telephone to call his broker. His broker said to him,” Hello sir! Welcome back! You’re a millionaire now!
The man said,” Oh really? What happened to my stocks?
The broker went on to explain how his stocks multiplied, some 10 times while the others 20 times but suddenly the telephone operator interrupted the man by saying,” Sorry your three minutes are up, that’ll be $250,000 for the next three minutes, please.”
How is inflation similar to toothpaste?
Once both get out, you can hardly get it back again.
Why are deaths due to shootings rising in America?
It is because of inflation, that shooters are longer able to provide a warning shot.
Why did the balloon store go out of business?
It is due to the cost of inflation.
What is an indication of inflation?
A Volkswagen with 12 Latinos in it.
What is the similarity between inflation and crabgrass?
None, both destroy. One destroys your savings, the other your lawn.
Why has the 5-second rule extended to a 10-second rule?
Due to inflation in food commodities.
Three generations of hookers live in the same house. The daughter prostitute returns home one day.
“I only received $40 for a fellatio!” she exclaims.
“That’s crazy!” exclaims the mother, “back in my day, I received $20 for it!”
The grandma prostitute adds, “What is this, $20? We were just happy to get something warm in our stomachs back then!”
How do you know inflation is bad?
My grandfather used to say that it was only “a penny for your thots.”
Did you think that inflation was bad just for you?
Wait till you see what it’s doing to our balloon animals.
What did the attendant do when a man entered the gas station and requested $5 in gas?
It farted and gave a receipt.
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A duck was crushed.
A woman carried a limp duck into a veterinarian. The vet took out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest as she placed her pet on the table.
After a few moments, the vet shook his head and said, “I’m sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has died.”
“Are you sure?” cried the distraught woman. “Yes, I am certain. Your duck has died, “The vet responded.
“How can you be so certain?” she questioned. “I mean, you haven’t put him through any tests or anything. He could be in a coma or something.”
The vet rolled his eyes, turned, and walked out of the room. He reappeared with a black Labrador Retriever a few minutes later. While the duck’s owner watched in awe, the dog stood on his hind legs, placed his front paws on the examination table, and smelled the duck from head to tail. He then shook his head and looked up at the vet with mournful eyes.
The veterinarian patted the dog on the head and escorted it out of the room. He returned a few minutes later with a cat. The cat hopped onto the table and smelled the bird from head to toe. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, softly meowed, and walked out of the room.
“I’m sorry, but as I said, this is very definitely, 100 percent undeniably, a dead duck,” the vet remarked to the woman.
The vet went to his computer terminal, pressed a few buttons, and produced a bill, which he presented to the woman.
The duck’s owner, still stunned, accepted the bill. “$150 just to inform me my duck is dead!” she exclaimed.
The vet shook his head, “I apologise. The cost would have been $20 if you had simply taken my word for it, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it’s now $150.”
Interviewer: What do you mean by Competitive Salary?
HR: It means your salary will be competing with your bills.
A man has to inflate his tyres, so he stops at a gas station, only to discover that the air pump requires a token from the gas station shop in order to function.
The man enters and requests one of the tokens.
“That will be 25p,” the cashier adds as he pays and receives the token.
The man gets back into his car and begins inflating his tyres, cursing as he realises the machine has run out of time halfway through.
He returns to the shop and requests another token.
“That will be 50p,” the cashier says.
“What?” the man exclaims. “A minute ago, it was 25p!”
“That’s inflation for you,” the cashier shrugs.
Why should governments around the world change their political symbols to condoms?
Because the rubber represents the government’s political stance more accurately. It stands up to inflation, halts production, ruins the next generation, shields a bunch of jerks, and provides you with a false sense of security while you’re getting screwed.
What makes you think gas prices are getting ridiculous?
When I went online to see how much my car was worth, it asked if the tank was empty or full.
How high is the price of lumber?
So high that the Feds confiscated a load of 2×4’s buried in kilos of cocaine.
What’s the best way to make a Fiat cost twice as much?
Fill up the tank.
What happens when you use Vodka instead of gas in a lawnmower?
The grass is half cut.
What caused the price of grapes to rise?
There was a raisin demand.
How outrageous are smartphone prices nowadays?
Well, if you fell and hear something break, you pray it’s a bone.
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What do you mean by inflation?
Inflation is being broke with a lot of money in your pocket.
What would you call Fiddy Cent’s kid?
Named after the father but adjusted to inflation, it will be Buck Fiddy.
Do you believe gas prices are high?
Chimneys are through the roof.
Did you know that 69 is now 96?
Eating out is becoming increasingly expensive in this deteriorating economy and inflation.
What if you got a dollar every time the economy inflated?
You would have an infinite amount of money but you would be poor as fuck.
Why are airbags so costly?
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Why are there fewer chips in potato chip packets these days?
It is due to inflation.
A boy and his grandmother were having a chat about the rising prices of commodities.
“When I was a kid, you could go to the grocery with a dollar and come home with enough food to feed your family for weeks!” she laments.
“Well, Grandma,” the youngster responds, “we recently learnt about it at school, and that’s called inflation.”
“No inflation!” exclaimed the granny. “It’s all the security cameras they have today!”
Have you heard that Tom Brady is considering running for President?
His platform is lowering inflation.
What are the similarities between the American dollar and the American dress size?
Both have had to adjust for inflation.
There’s the story of an elderly lady selling pretzels for 25 cents on a New York street corner. Every day at noon, a young man walks by and drops a quarter in the cup but does not take a pretzel. She never says anything. He does this for three years till he drops the quarter in her cup and she finally speaks. “They’re now 35 cents.”
How did the banker react/say when he learned that inflation had reached an all-time high?
“That really peaks my interest.”
Mr Ligma was walking in the streets after eating some delicious burrito. He suddenly felt like he needed to take a shit. He goes to a public bathroom.
A man stops Ligma: “Where do you think you’re going? The toilet costs $5 to use”
Ligma thought the price was outrageous: “Hell no. I will just take a shit at home.”
Ligma starts walking, but his stomach started to make funny noises. When he felt the pain in his stomach, he decided to go back to that bathroom.
But that man was still there: “Before you go. Give me $10”
“Wait, didn’t you say $5 earlier?”
“Yeah, but there is an inflation bro. Prices go up”
“You know what? Fuck that shit. I’m not giving you that money” Ligma goes outside again.
As his stomach pain gets worse, he thinks to himself: “What if I fucking shit my pants? That would be embarrassing as hell”.
So he decided to give that bathroom another visit. The man stops him again: “That would be $20”
“You gotta be shitting me man”
“Bro, did you forget about inflation?”
“The fuck do I look like? Amber Heard? Do you think that’s what I like? I can just hold it.”
As Ligma walks outside, his stomach pain got really worse. He gave up and went back there one more time, willing to give the man whatever he wants: “It’s $30 now”
“What?…. you know what? Fuck it. Here you go before you give me a lecture on inflation.”
Ligma goes inside the bathroom, but he doesn’t come back. It’s been almost 30 minutes since he has been there. The man gets suspicious, so he goes there and knocks on the door, but there is no response. After a few minutes of knocking, the man has no choice but to break the door. He keeps kicking the door until it breaks… The poor man was shocked to see Mr Ligma being hanged from the ceiling by his belt. There appears to be a suicide note on the floor. He picks it up. It says: “During this horrible inflation if you can’t tell the difference between the feeling of going to shit or fart, you better be dead.”
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What is the problem with Inflation Jokes?
Unfortunately, the joke decreases in funniness over time.
Why did God create economists?
To make weathermen look good.
One day, a time traveller knocked on my door and came in. He sat down and told me he wanted to inform me about the future because if this knowledge was given to me, I could be trusted to use it for good. He told me a lot of things during the following several minutes, but I still had a lot of questions.
I inquired about global warming. He informed me that after 2035, nations were serious about the situation, and it was nearly fixed.
I inquired about Covid-19. He told me that it would be a blip on the radar of human history and that pandemics were no longer a concern.
I inquired about the huge economic crisis we are experiencing. He stated that, notwithstanding previous borrowing and deficits, the loans had now been repaid. The US has never been a more prosperous or united community. Everyone gets access to free healthcare.
I was overjoyed to hear all of this. I inquired about inflation and how much a gallon of water, a loaf of bread, or a cup of coffee costs. He grinned and told me not to worry about such little matters. In the year 2045, it was still possible to get a cup of coffee at Starbucks in America for less than 150 Yuan.
Why are tyres so costly?
Inflation, of course.
Which of these inflation jokes made you the biggest laugh? Please leave your opinions in the space below!