Jokes

40 Funny Patriotic Jokes for People Who Love Freedom

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Jessica Amlee

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Freedom, the cornerstone of any democratic nation, holds immense significance. It is the right that allows us to express our ideas, choose our paths, and celebrate our diverse cultures. Young people, the future torchbearers of these liberties, play a vital role in understanding and preserving the essence of freedom. Amid serious discussions about rights and responsibilities, there’s a lighter side to patriotism as well, often expressed through patriotic jokes. These puns typically revolve around national symbols, historical events, or national stereotypes, presenting them in a humorous and playful light.

These freedom jokes not only incite laughter but also kindle a sense of camaraderie and shared identity among the youth. By understanding the humor and the heart of their nation, they are better equipped to contribute to and cherish their democratic freedoms.

Best Patriotic Jokes

Isn’t it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom in the US?
Until they are flashing behind you.


Do you know that there is freedom of speech in China?
But there is no freedom after speech.


Well, if crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?
They never mention that part to us, do they?!


Where is the freedom of a slave whose hobby is making necklaces?
Independence.


Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Liberty.
(Liberty who?)
Liberty Bells are ringing, freedom’s here!


What do you call a display of Australian patriotism?
Stockholm Syndrome.


Yo mama so fat, the US military wanted to give her freedom.


What is so different about countries without freedom of speech?
Well, some things are better left unsaid.


What do you call tea that tastes like freedom?
LiberTEA.


Why should the gyms remain open throughout the year?
Every democratic constitution guarantees freedom of the press.


What happened to the statistician who was arrested?
He now has zero degrees of freedom.


How do you take away an Italian’s freedom of speech?
Handcuff them.


What’s the first amendment in Super Mario’s constitution?
Freedom of Peach.


What do you call a Patriotic Hulk?
Dr. Star Spangled Banner.


Which branch of the United States military is the most patriotic?
The Air Force; they’re US AF.


Little Johnny: The F in China stands for freedom.
Little Timmy: There isn’t an F in China.
Little Johnny: Exactly.


Why are there no knock-knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings!


Recommended: Fourth Of July Jokes


What’s more patriotic than the Fourth of July?
The half of July.


Did you hear about the American who wrote an essay about American Patriotism?
Then he pointed at it and started shouting ‘ You Essay! You Essay!’


What do patriotic horses eat?
U.S.HAY.


Do you remember the time when the American flag used to be a symbol of freedom and liberty?
But now it means, “Oh yeah. This person is about to say some real dumb shit on Facebook.”


A nurse was taking care of a soldier in the Army Hospital.
“How I wish I could kiss the American flag before I die,” the soldier said. The nurse was extremely touched by the soldier’s patriotism and said, “I have a tattoo of the American flag on my bottom. You may kiss it if you don’t mind.”
“Of course, I wouldn’t mind. Thank you for fulfilling my last wish,” the soldier said. The nurse took off her panties and the dying soldier kissed the flag.
“Thank you, nurse,” he said “Now would you be so kind as to turn around so that I could kiss Bush too?”


Wanna hear a joke about freedom?
No nevermind, the Chinese won’t get it.


Why are ginger balls the most patriotic?
They’re red, white and blue.


What is the most patriotic part of a dad’s body?
The prostate.


Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Bald.
(Bald who?)
Bald like an eagle, soaring in freedom!


What’s the opposite of Freedom?
Freesubm.


Why should the date of a prisoner’s freedom be called a period?
Because it’s the end of their sentence.


What do you call milk that supports freedom of religion?
Lactose and tolerant.


What does the ‘F’ in Hong Kong stand for?
Freedom.


An American patriot with amputated arms decides to replace them.
He obtains a pair of grizzly bear arms from a black market, and attaches them on his own, with the help of a friend.
He is arrested for contributing to animal cruelty and performing medical procedures unlicensed.
When taken to court, he gives a speech defending his right to bear arms.


Why is Dark humor like freedom?
Not everyone gets it.


Why do deaf people lose their freedom of speech when arrested?
They are handcuffed.


How would Gandhi look if he didn’t fight for India’s freedom?
Alive.


Why does the queen have the most freedom in chess?
Cause the board looks like a kitchen floor.


Why is Wakanda like a bl*ck person’s freedom?
It really never was real in the first place.


Do you have a funny Patriotic joke? Write down your own Patriotic puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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