40 Funny Principal Jokes for a Happier Staff Lounge

Updated on:

Jessica Amlee

1 Comment

Get ready to embark on a laughter-filled journey, where school life and humor collide to create an unforgettable experience. Our blog is packed with an incredible array of principal jokes, puns, and anecdotes, designed to entertain and amuse students of all ages.

Whether you’re looking for the perfect joke to share with your classmates or seeking a witty one-liner for staff meetings, we’ve got you covered. Discover how laughter can bring people together and create a fun, lively atmosphere in your school. So, come along as we dive into the world of principal jokes, and let’s unleash the power of humor to make school days more exciting and memorable!

Best Principal Jokes

Do you know Timmy’s fifth-grade teacher taught him how to smoke pot and kiss?
Best hire he’s ever made as a school principal.

Why did the chicken go to the principal’s office?
It used fowl language!

What can you say about people who drop out of school?
They have no principals or class.

Yo mama so stupid when the school principal gave her an F during an interview, she thought that the principal had (F)Fun marking her!

Why did the clock get sent to the principal’s office?
During class, it wouldn’t stop tocking.

Why did the principal panic during the teacher’s strike?
Because he was losing control of his faculties.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(B-4 who?)
B-4 you take the diploma, shake the principal’s hand.

What did the principal say to the student after he trashed the boys’ bathroom?
“URINALot of trouble!”

What did the inflatable principal say to the inflatable student who bought a pin to the inflatable school?
“Not only have you let me down, you’ve also let the school down but, above all, you’ve let yourself down.”

Why was Harry Potter sent to the office?
Because he was cursing in class!

Principal: Sorry to call you in, but your son set the school on fire.
Parents: Arson?
Principal: Yes, your son.

What do get when you cross one middle school principal with a high school principal?
One wouldn’t do it, principals don’t like to be crossed, ever!

“I’ve just had a rock thrown through my window, are you responsible?”
“No, I’m irresponsible,” says the student. That’s why I threw it.”

Boy: Our principal is so stupid.
Girl: Don’t you know who I am?
Boy: No.
Girl: I’m the principal’s daughter.
Boy: Do you know who I am?
Girl: No.
Boy: Good (walks away)!

Why was the hamburger bun sent to the principal’s office?
He was being a bad roll model.

Why are principals fond of fish?
They travel in schools!

A son comes home from school and hugs his mother crying
He says: I don’t want to go back to school and I’ll give you two reasons why.
The mother says: Ok, what are your reasons?
Son: All the kids hate me and all the teachers hate me.
Mother: You’re going to go back to school, and I’ll give you one reason why.
Son: Yeah?
Mother: You’re the Principal.

Why did the little rectangle get sent to the principal’s office?
He said a square word.

The phone rang in the principal’s office.
Principal: Hello?
Caller: Umm yes hi, my son won’t be coming to school today because he’s got the flu.
Principal: OK and who may I ask is speaking?
Caller: Umm my dad.

A father is called into the principal’s office because his son is in big trouble.
The father sits down next to his son with the principal across at his desk.
“We caught your son selling pot for 15 dollars a joint out back. He’s permanently expelled. You’re lucky we didn’t call the cops.”
The father looks at his son with horror and disgust. He gets up quickly and drags his son to the car in a fit.
As they both get in, the father looks angrily at his son and says “I TOLD YOU 20 DOLLARS, YOU IDIOT!!!!”

Why did Average get sent to the principal’s office
He was being mean.

Who is a teacher’s best friend at school?
The princi-pal!

A principal notices a Post-It on a locker.
“Jocks of JFK High! This small change in diet can boost your physique FOREVER! Head to the gym to find out how!”
Puzzled, he pulls it off and continues down the hall. Just a few lockers down, another catches his eye.
“Hey goth girls! Tired of dark eyeliner that just runs all day? One simple trick will fix it! Find out in the gym!”
“OK, I’ll bite,” the principal chuckles to himself. He walks to the gymnasium, pushes open the door…and immediately gets stuck. He looks down and sees the floor covered with super-glue.
He looks around and sees several students in the same pickle–dramaturgs, cheerleaders, artists–all desperately trying to free themselves.
Outraged, he removes his shoes to unstick himself and races around the school until he finds a kid placing a note, this time aimed at math geeks, on yet another locker. He slaps the note out of his hand and shouts, “Quit posting clique-bait everywhere!”

Principal: Students, how can we maintain the school tidy
Student: By staying at home.

Son: Father Tomorrow is a small get-together at school.
Father: Small gathering? How small is it?
Son: Only me…you…and the principal.

Teacher: Every day this week, I’ve had to send you to the principal. What do you have to say about this?
Student: I’m relieved that today is the last day of school!

Recommended: Last Day Of School Jokes

What made the principal marry the janitor?
Because he completely swept her off her feet!

Three school teachers go to the nude beach: the math teacher, the history teacher, and the logics teacher. Suddenly, the female principal goes by them. So the math and history teacher put their newspapers on their private parts, while the logics teacher puts it on his face.
After the principal leaves, the first two ask the logics teacher, “Why did you put your newspaper on your face? She clearly saw your junk!”
“That’s the thing,” replied the logics teacher. “I’m mostly recognized by my face!”

Little Johnny hates school and got caught skipping the other day.
The principal said, “Walk normal next time, you fruitcake.”

If a group of vaping college students is called a smog.
What about a group of vaping middle school students? They are called down to the principal’s office.

A teacher sees a knife in Jimmy’s backpack.
“Don’t worry sir, it’s only a kitchen knife.”
“And that?”
“Kitchen gun.”

Why couldn’t the principal call the orphan parents?
Because he don’t have any.

Where does the architecture school’s principal send bad students?
To the suspension bridge.

Why did the school principal forbid the use of true/false tests?
It was part of the school’s anti Boolean campaign.

The first day of school was here. While doing his rounds, the principal heard a horrible disturbance coming from one of the classes. He dashed in and noticed one of the boys, taller than the rest and making the most noise. He grabbed the boy, took him into the hall, and told him to stay there until he was excused. When the principal returned to the classroom, he restored order and lectured the class for half an hour about the importance of good behavior. “Are there any questions?” he said.
One female tentatively stood up. “Please, sir,” she begged, “may we have our teacher back?”

Recommended: Back To School Jokes

Why did the principal dismiss the cross-eyed teacher?
She couldn’t control her pupils.

What did the cheerleader say when she was given detention by the principal?
“Bring It On.”

Last year, 7th grade students were forced to clean the entire school.
This year, the principal said, “Last year, the 7th grade student did the cleaning. This year, let the 8th grade students do it.”

What do you call a principal that used to be a prostitute?
The Head Master.

Do you have another principal joke? Post your principal puns in the comment section below.

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

1 thought on “40 Funny Principal Jokes for a Happier Staff Lounge”

Leave a Comment