30 Dirty Snow White Jokes And Puns for Naughty Adults

Updated on:

Jessica Amlee

1 Comment

Snow White, the timeless fairy tale character, isn’t just for kids’ bedtime stories. As adults, we can appreciate a whole new side of this classic tale. Picture this: Snow White, not as the innocent damsel we all remember, but as a sassy, witty character who can handle more than just singing with birds and running from wicked queens. Imagine her navigating the complexities of living with seven very distinct personalities, each with their own set of quirks and humor. Now, this isn’t your typical storybook scenario; it’s Snow White with a twist, filled with clever banter and a bit of cheeky fun. As we delve into this grown-up version, it’s time to prepare for a different kind of magic – one that comes from smart, slightly adult humor. That’s right, we’re talking about dirty Snow White jokes, a spicier take on the fairy tale we all know and love.

Now, let’s get into the heart of these dirty Snow White jokes. Think about the endless possibilities for humor when you mix a bit of adult wit with classic fairy tale elements. There’s something undeniably amusing about taking a story known for its purity and innocence and turning it on its head with a bit of playful naughtiness. These jokes are for those who love a good laugh with a side of nostalgia, but with a twist that’s definitely not suitable for the kiddie table. It’s about seeing Snow White and her seven companions in a whole new light, where the humor is as sharp as the queen’s poisoned apple is sweet. So brace yourselves for a hilarious journey through the enchanted forest, but this time, leave your innocence at the door. Let’s dive into the humor that’s just right for adults who haven’t forgotten how to enjoy a good fairy tale, with a mischievous grin, of course!

Adult Snow White Jokes

What did the Seven Dwarfs say when the prince woke up Snow White?
“Welp…. I guess it’s back to jerking off!”

Did you know there was an eight dwarf?
His name was lumpy, he died of cancer.

What’s red and has 7 dents in it?
Snow whites cherry.

Peter Dinklage has slammed the remake of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, calling it ‘backwards’.
Guess he’ll be playing Grumpy then.

What did Snow White complain about after staying for a month with the dwarves?
“I’d rather have a 7 inch one time than one inch 7 times”

What did the 7 dwarves call Snow White?
High hoe.

Why doesn’t Snow White have any children?
She’s still waiting for her prince to cum.

Snow White once spilled Sprite on herself.
So she started changing in front of the dwarves, then they had 7 up.

Why wouldn’t Snow White date any of the dwarfs?
Because she wouldn’t date a Miner.

A man got a job crafting toy models of the dwarves from Snow White.
The pay sucks, but he’s not lying when he tell people he makes seven figures.

Recommended: Clean Snow White Jokes

Snow White started a tutoring center for the Dwarves to teach them math.
She called it ‘Making the Little Things Count.’

One day the Seven Dwarfs decided they wanted to see Snow White naked.
Their only option was to spy on her in the shower. They decided to stand on each other’s shoulders and watch through a small window above the bathroom door. Dopey being the smallest was on top, calling down to the others what he saw.
“She’s taking off her skirt” He whispers to the next one down, who whispers it to the next.
“She’s taking off her shirt” “She’s taking off her shirt””She’s taking off her shirt”…
“She’s totally naked!” “totallly naked!” “Totally naked!”…
This continued, Dopey describing Snow’s every motion, and the others passing it on. And then he thought he heard footsteps.
“Shhhh! Someone’s coming!” “me too!” “me too!” “me too!”….

Once upon a time, one of the seven dwarves started hitting on Snow White.
She was not f*cking happy.

What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?
Snow White Supremacist.

What did the prince say when he kissed Snow White?
“Dead girls can’t say no!”

Why did Pinocchio and Snow White get kicked out of Disney land?
She sat on his face and said, “lie ya basterd lie.”

A newly hired farm hand is tending to his daily duties when Snow White approaches him.
“How are you today, good sir?” she asks.
“Very good, Snow White.” He responds
“How are the animals today? Have you yet to ask them?” She asks.
A bit confused, the farm hand answers, “Animals don’t talk, ma’am. However, I’m sure they’re just fine.”
Snow White walks up to the donkey. “How are you today, donkey?”
“Very good, my lady!” replies the donkey.
She walks up to the pig. “How’s your day, pig?”
“A fine day, indeed!” replies the pig.
Suddenly the man starts shouting, “The sheep LIES! The sheep LIES!”

Snow White and the Prince decided to buy the Seven Dwarfs a hot tub.
They all got in and started feeling Happy. So he got out and left, now they’re all f*cking Grumpy.

Snow White was in the bathtub, feeling sleepy.
Then he got out, so she felt Dopey instead.

Why wasn’t the ‘Snow White and seven dwarfs’ p*rn parody successful?
There were too many short comings.

The seven dwarfs go to the Vatican, and because they are the seven dwarfs, they are immediately ushered in to see the Pope.
Grumpy leads the pack.
“Grumpy, my son,” says the Pope, “What can I do for you?”
Grumpy asks, “Excuse me your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns in Rome?”
The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a moment and answers, “No, Grumpy, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome.”
In the background, a few of the dwarfs start giggling. Grumpy turns around and glares, silencing them. Grumpy turns back, “Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in all of Europe?”
The Pope, puzzled now, again thinks for a moment and then answers, “No, Grumpy, there are no dwarf nuns in Europe.”
This time, all of the other dwarfs burst into laughter. Once again, Grumpy turns around and silences them with an angry glare. Grumpy turns back and says, “Mr.. Pope! Are there ANY dwarf nuns anywhere in the world?”
The Pope, really confused by the questions says, “I’m sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world.”
The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling and laughing, pounding the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks, as they begin chanting, “Grumpy shagged a penguin! Grumpy shagged a penguin!”

Why did the seven dwarfs keep smiling while running on the field?
Because the grass tickled their balls.

What’s red and shiny with seven dents in it but still good as new?
Snow-white’s hymen.

One night, a granddaughter sneaked out of her bedroom and snuggled up next to him on the couch.
She looked at the TV he was watching and she said sweetly, “Granddad, I want to watch Snow White and the 7 Dwarves with you!”
“Uh, this is actually Midget P*rn.”

Do you remember, as a kid, all those evil stepmothers in fairy tales such as Snow White, Hansel and Gretel, and Cinderella?
Then, along came P*rnHub, and suddenly stepmothers weren’t so evil after all.

Prince Charming drew close to Snow White. He put his lips to her ear.

Ever wonder how the seven dwarves got their names?
Miss Snow White was a randy cow,
And desperate for a f*ck.
So off she went into the woods,
To try and get some luck!
She’d almost given up looking,
When she saw some chimney smoke.
Then stumbled on a cottage,
And went in for a poke.
Her clothes came off in seconds.
And she’d just removed her pants,
When seven Dwarves came marching in,
With a merry song and dance.
Snow White just stood there speechless,
And thought she was in heaven!
Originally after one good shag,
But now she could have seven.
Straight away she took command,
“My fanny need a lick!”
And when one dwarf moved forward,
She said, “Oi-you’d better drop you pick!”
So down he went onto all fours,
And said, “I ain’t licking that!”
“Not there, that me arse-hole,
You DOPEY little brat!”
The next dwarf started blushing,
“Do we have to do it here?”
Snow White said “Don’t be BASHFUL!
Unless you’re f*cking queer!”
So reluctantly he whipped it out,
To prove he was no fool.
And Snow White gave a big “Heigh-Ho”
As she rode upon his tool.
Now one dwarf wasn’t smiling,
‘Cos he hadn’t had a sniff.
And due to his impatience,
He couldn’t raise a stiff.
“Relax, you GRUMPY bastard”,
So he did as he was told.
And as soon as he was hard enough,
He shot his f*cking load.
The next dwarf got a blow job,
And she took him in quite easy.
But she just avoided brain-damage,
When he sneezed, she called him SNEEZY.
With three dwarves left, she turned and said,
“You’re next, I want your knob!”
But no sooner had he entered her,
Than he was sleeping on the job.
“Wake up you SLEEPY idiot”
She wanted more from him.
And he woke with such excitement,
That he filled her hairy quim.
The next dwarf rammed his up her,
And shagged her fanny raw.
And dazed Snow White then whimpered,
“That should be against the law!”
He made poor Snow White tremble,
He was so big and thick.
“No wonder you’re so HAPPY,
With that f*cking great big dick.”
With one dwarf still remaining,
But feeling rather sore,
She said “You’ll have to use your tongue,
My cl*t can’t take no more.!”
And so he put his tongue to work,
Where others had put their c*cks.
And ‘cos he made Snow White feel better,
She named the last one DOC.
Now Snow White couldn’t do much,
With all that cum inside her quim,
So she grabbed a cup, and squatted,
And filled it to the brim.
So there’s the truth about the dwarves,
And how they got their names,
By satisfying miss Snow White,
And joining in her games.
There’s one more thing you need to know,
And that’s what happened to that cup?
Well think of what you’re drinking…
When you next buy 7-UP!!

Why can’t the Seven Dwarfs get into a bar?
Because they don’t serve miners.

A husband said to his wife, “Our relationship is a lot like a Disney movie.”
“Aww… That’s cute,” she giggled, “I’m your princess and you are my charming prince?”
“Not exactly,” he said. “I’ve f*cked seven dwarfs.”

Have you ever wondered why the seven dwarfs were never married?
They had access to hi ho’s.

Do you have a dirty Snow White joke? Write down your own adult puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

1 thought on “30 Dirty Snow White Jokes And Puns for Naughty Adults”

Leave a Comment