60 Funny It’s So Hot Jokes To Beat the Heat

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Jessica Amlee


“It’s so hot” phrases are the go-to puns when the sun decides to turn up the thermostat and bake us like cookies in an oven. These sayings are a humorous way to acknowledge the sweltering heat while trying to keep our cool – literally. They’re the kind of phrases you’d hear and instantly know that, yes, it is indeed hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk or melt your favorite pair of flip-flops. From exaggerated comparisons to imaginative scenarios, these expressions add a splash of humor to the otherwise scorching reality. And when the mercury rises, so does the creativity of these sayings, leading to the ever-popular genre of “It’s So Hot” jokes.

Speaking of “It’s So Hot” jokes, they’re like the water balloons of comedy – refreshing and perfectly timed for the summer heat. These jokes take the mundane fact of a hot day and twist it into something absurdly funny. They’re the type of jokes that spread like wildfire at pool parties and summer camps, making everyone chuckle with their playful exaggerations. Imagine someone saying, “It’s so hot, the birds are using oven mitts to pull worms out of the ground.” That’s the essence of these jokes – silly, light-hearted, and just what you need to beat the heat with a smile. So, when the sun’s rays are relentless, remember, a good “It’s So Hot” joke might just be the coolest thing around.

Best It’s So Hot Jokes 

It’s so hot outside that the ice cream man just changed the sign on his van’s side to “cream.”

It’s so hot, I asked Bear Grylls to piss on me.

It’s so hot out, I had sex with Aquaman and don’t feel gay about it.

It’s so hot, the carton of milk I’m drinking was a bad idea.

It’s so damn hot outside, gangs are doing drive-bys with super soakers.

It’s so hot, I saw an Amish guy buy an air conditioner.

It’s so hot out, that I carry a spatula to pry my balls off my leg.

It’s so hot, Global Warming was like “Damn, it’s hot out.”

It’s so hot out, Superman took a cab.

It’s so hot, I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking.

It’s so hot out, I saw a chicken lay a fried egg.

It’s so hot out, I just saw a penguin blow a seal.

It’s so hot in Texas, I bought some Mrs Baird’s bread, but by the time I got home, it was Texas Toast.

It’s so hot, I just saw two trees fighting over a dog.

It’s so hot, Bill Cosby is sleeping with his wife to get a cold shoulder.

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It’s so hot, I pissed that hot beer yesterday.

It’s so hot in Bangalore that, to escape the heat, I’m running off to Chennai tomorrow.

It’s so hot, my t-shirt says tough shit.

It’s so hot, freaks don’t come out at night.

It’s so hot, I tried taking a cold shower and got third-degree burns.

It’s so hot, my crayons are now watercolors.

It’s so hot, my new phrase for making love is burning rubber.

It’s so hot, my Iceberg lettuce melted.

It’s so hot that I tried pleasuring myself and had a heat stroke.

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It’s so hot in Texas right now, even my hair is getting sunburnt.

It’s so so hot today, I almost called up some old friends to be around some shade.

It’s so hot out that I should really be Putin on sunscreen.

It’s so hot, I’m going to Home Depot just to stand in front of one of their industrial-sized fans.

It’s so hot, the devil is out front sunbathing in a thong.

It’s so hot and humid outside, the air ironed the wrinkles out of my shirt.

It’s so hot outside that Dune is starting to feel like a training manual.

It’s so hot in Florida, you discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.

It’s so hot my apple juice fermented into wine and got fizzy like soda.

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It’s so hot outside, I almost want to move to hell to cool off.

It’s so hot out, I saw a bee take off its yellow jacket.

It’s so hot, all the bread in the store is toast.

It’s so hot, I went outside for a smoke and the cigarette lit itself.

It’s so hot the cookie dough I bought turned into cookies!

It’s so hot that the corn on the stalks started popping.

It’s so hot, that I got in the jacuzzi to cool off.

It’s so hot that every time I try to speak all that comes out is a Tennessee Williams monologue.

It’s so hot in LA, dreams are melting all over the sidewalk.

It’s so hot right now in SoCal, I just saw an iguana with a parasol.

It’s so hot, I wish I could put my t*tties in a ponytail.

It’s so hot, that you could actually cook a full English breakfast on my forehead.

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It’s so hot, I think mosquitoes took a day off.

It’s so hot in L.A, police chalk outlines have sweat marks under their arms.

It’s so hot, you gotta put deodorant on before bed.

It’s so hot, I microwaved my head just to cool down a little.

It’s so hot, Jesus turned the wine back into water.

It’s so hot, Coldplay is room temperature.

It’s so hot, when a guy says he is looking at OnlyFans, he is actually looking at only table fans.

It’s so hot, when I took water out of the refrigerator, the goddamn bottle started sweating!

It’s so hot in Arizona, you can make instant sun tea.

It’s so hot out, I walked through a car wash to remember what rain felt like.

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It’s so hot, I’m sweating like a Catholic choirboy tying his shoelaces.

It’s so hot, I’m watching March of the Penguins just to cool down.

It’s so hot that I’ve gone for Lemon & Herb in Nando’s.

It’s so hot, my canon is overheating in photo mode.

It’s so hot out, I baked lasagna in my mailbox.

Got better funny it’s so hot one-liners? Let us know how hot is it in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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