In the quirky world of humor, “No Arms and No Legs” scenarios have carved out their own niche. It’s a realm where imagination runs wild, conjuring up situations where characters are, quite literally, limbless. This might sound like a blueprint for tragedy, but in the hands of a skilled jokester, it’s comedy gold. The key lies in playful wordplay and absurd scenarios that transform limitation into a springboard for creativity. Whether it’s someone named Matt lying on the doorstep or a fellow named Bob floating in a pool, the humor is always in the unexpected twist. And this leads us to the curious and chuckling universe of “No Arms and No Legs” jokes.
“No Arms and No Legs” jokes are a testament to humor’s power to turn the tables on any situation. These jokes take a seemingly impossible scenario and flip it into a setting for hilarity, proving that laughter often comes from the most unexpected places. It’s about finding the funny in the face of adversity, a reminder that humor can be found in the most unlikely of places, making everyone double over with laughter, regardless of how many limbs they’ve got!
Best No Arms & No Legs Jokes
What do you call a guy with no arms and legs in a tree?
Russell.
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg?
Eileen.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter; it ain’t coming to you.
What do you call a man with no arms and legs on your front step?
Matt.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall?
Art.
What do you call his arms and legs?
Pieces of Art.
What do you call a man who floats in the water with no arms and legs?
Bob.
What do you call two men with no arms or legs hanging in front of a window?
Curt an’ Rod.
What do you call a man and a woman on a grill with no arms or legs?
Frank and Patty.
What do you call a man with no arms or legs being pulled by a boat?
Skip.
Why can’t Sally swing on the swings?
Because she has no arms or legs.
Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Not Sally.
What do you call an Asi*n woman with one arm and one leg?
Irene.
Recommended: Asi*n Jokes
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, in the desert?
F*ucked.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a mailbox?
Bill.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No ideer.
What do you call a dog with no hind legs and steel balls running down the freeway?
Sparky.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the sink?
Dwayne.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs at the edge of a hole?
Doug.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in side the hole?
Phil.
What do you call a guy with no arms, no legs, no brain, and who doesn’t do anything except repeat things people say in a very loud voice?
Mike.
Recommended: Wheelchair Jokes
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a hot tub?
Stu.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs laying underneath your car?
Jack.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs who join the military?
Sandbag.
Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Wherever you left it.
What do you call a woman with no arms and no legs in between two poles?
Annette.
What do you call a woman with no arms and no legs on the wall?
Peg.
What do you call a Mexican woman with no legs?
Cuntswaylow.
Recommended: Orphan Jokes
A newborn is born without limbs, legs, or a torso. In reality, he is only a head. But his parents appreciated and cared for him throughout his youth.
When he was 18, his father took him to the local tavern for his first pint of beer. When he took his first sip, his torso appeared with a “whoosh.” After taking a second sip, his arms and legs appeared.
He was so thrilled that he sprang up and raced outside into the street, where he was hit by an incoming truck. He was blown across the road.
The barman looks at the Dad and says, “You know what? That boy should have quit while he was ahead!”
What do you call a Chinese guy with no arms and no legs who is in your toilet?
Dung.
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a pile of leaves, two weeks later?
Pete.
What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the fireplace?
Bernie.
What do you call a girl with no arms or legs in the fireplace?
Ashley.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs thrown in the air?
Chuck.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a bed?
Richard.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs that come flying over the fence?
Homer.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs playing with a cat?
Claude.
What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch?
Names.
What do you call a cow on two legs?
Yo mama.
Recommended: Yo Mama Jokes
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs who can play 4 musical instruments at the same time?
Stump the band.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, stuck in a basketball hoop?
Duncan.
What do you call the man who swam the English Channel with no arms and no legs?
Clever Dick.
Recommended: P*nis Jokes
What do you call a girl with no arms or legs on the beach?
Sandy.
What do you call a girl with no arms or legs at the bottom of an elevator shaft?
Dot.
Every hour, a man with no arms or legs climbed the bell tower of the town’s church.
He would bang his face on the bell at the top of the hour, informing everyone in the town of the time.
After ringing the bell one night, he lost his balance and died on the sidewalk below.
When the cops arrived, there were a few people gathered around the body. “Do you know who this man is?” a police officer questioned a woman standing beside the body.
The woman replied, “No, but his face rings a bell.”
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs playing baseball?
Third base.
What do ya call a guy with no arms and no legs with a seagull on his head?
Cliff.
What do you call a guy who’s missing his vehicle?
Carlos.
What do you call a man who can’t stand?
Neil.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs snuggled up in the arms of a beautiful woman?
Lucky.
Recommended: Helen Keller Jokes
What do you call an Irishman with no arms and no legs laying by your pool?
Patty O’Furniture.
What has four arms, four legs and never works out?
Marriage.
What do you call a man with no arms and legs in a snowstorm?
A Snowman.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs on a barbershop floor?
Harry.
What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the bathroom?
John.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a mine shaft?
Dead.
What did the boy with no arms get for his birthday?
Don’t know he hasn’t opened it yet.
What do you call a boy with no arms or legs in the sea?
Buoy.
What do you call a guy with no legs and pointy, elfish ears?
Legolas.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs driving a car?
Rex.
What do you call a man in a lion’s cage with no arms and no legs?
Claude.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a volcano?
Anakin Skywalker.
What do you call a woman with no arms, no legs and covered in bees?
Honey.
What do you call a woman with no arms, no legs, and covered in sugar?
Sweetie.
What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs?
Cash and Carry.
Recommended: Blind Jokes
What do you say to a woman with no arms or legs?
“Nice tits!”
How do you call a man without a left ear, without a left arm and without a left leg?
All right.
How does a person with no arms or legs cross a freeway?
Take the F out of Free and the F out of way.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs rolling down a hill?
An ambulance.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a brick wall?
Mason.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Cigarette, because you always take him out for a drag after dinner.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a stream?
Adam.
What do you call a man with no ankles?
Tony.
Recommended: Dyslexic Jokes
What do you call a teenager with no arms and no legs?
Grounded.
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs being pulled on a chain?
Yank.
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs stuck in the gears of a machine?
Paul.
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in someone’s pants?
Peter.
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs at sunrise?
Don.
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a bear costume?
Ted.
What do you call a girl with no arms or legs but with wooden prosthetic legs?
Peggy.
Recommended: Short People Jokes
What do you call a man with no arms or legs that works at a brewery?
Bud.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the VA hospital?
Norm.
Hope you found the list of jokes comprehensive and funny. Let us know in the comment section below.
