35 Funny Oscars Jokes from the 95th Academy Awards

Funny Oscars Jokes of Academy Awards
Funny Oscars Jokes

The Oscars have been a source of laughs and entertainment for decades, and the show’s comedic moments are some of the most memorable. From the hilarious opening monologues to the witty acceptance speeches, the Academy Awards have seen their fair share of comedic gold. But it’s not just the planned jokes that make us laugh – sometimes the funniest moments come from unexpected surprises, like when a presenter flubs a line or a winner makes an off-the-cuff remark.

Whether you’re a die-hard fan of the Oscars or just enjoy a good laugh, there’s no denying the comedic value of Hollywood’s biggest night. So join us as we look back at some of the most iconic Oscars jokes and moments, and celebrate the joy of laughter in the world of film.

Best Oscars Jokes

Did you know that the Oscars is a big f*cking lie all the way along?
The people they invite to their ceremonies are all paid actors.

2012 headlines: End white supremacy, we need more black faces at Hollywood awards.
2022 headlines: Black-on-black violence at Oscars caused by systemic racism.
2032 headlines: Only 17 shot dead at ‘mostly peaceful’ Oscars.

Chris Rock just declined the invite to host the 2023 Academy Awards.
That’s a real shame, last time he hosted it absolutely slapped.

Why did Leonardo DiCaprio laugh at the Oscar joke in 2016?
Because he finally got it.

Did you hear that the female directors are snubbed for the Oscars 2023?
Should never have arrested Harvey Weinstein.

Knock knock.
(Who’s there?)
Oscar who?
Oscar silly question, you already know who I am!

What happened when you tell Jennifer Lawrence a joke about how she won her Oscar?
She fell for it.

Why hasn’t Liam Neeson been nominated for another Oscar in the last 30 years?
All his roles have been Taken.

How did Cookie Monster decide who’d win the Oscars?
He went through all the nom-nom-nominations.

Yo mama so dramatic, she won an Oscar in her sleep.

Did you hear about the scarecrow who won an Oscar?
He was out standing in his field.

What do Moonlight and Moon Knight have in common?
The other Oscar isn’t real.

Why do they give out an award for Best Supporting Actor?
Because everyone needs a little help from their friends.

Did you know about this fact about the Oscars?
They are so long, they actually give out an award for Best Picture and then another for Best Nap.

Why are sports fans interested in the Oscars?
They’re placing bets on who’s going to trip on the stairs.

What is the difference between the Oscars and a family reunion?
The Oscars are like a family reunion, except it’s a family of celebrities who all hate each other.

How are the Oscars like a game of musical chairs?
They are the same except everyone during the Oscars is fighting for a seat in front of the camera.

Why did the actress bring her ladder to the Oscars?
She heard the competition was going to be stiff.

A mosquito was flying around an Oscars party.
First, it bothered Emma Watson, then it landed on Natalie Portman. It then flew over to pester Jessica Alba and finally Gal Gadot before security caught it.
During its interrogation, it confessed “I can’t help it. I’m a sucker for a pretty face.”

Did you hear about Will Smith who received Oscar for his role?
The Pursuit of Slappiness.

What did Chris Rock have on his face after the Oscars?
Fresh prints.

Did you hear about the Pokemon Trainer who got an Emmy, a Grammy, an Oscar, and a Tony?
Looks like EGOT ’em all.

How do you get to the Oscars?
With an osCAR.

Why did the actress bring her pet goat to the Oscars?
She heard they were giving out Best Picture.

Why did the actor bring a sandwich to the Oscars?
He heard they were handing out Best Supporting Roll.

What do the Oscars and the Grammys have in common?
Rock’s greatest hits.

If a cat won an Oscar, what would he get?
An A-cat-emy award.

After the iceberg collision, the captain of the Titanic gathers the crew and tells them, “I have bad news and good news.
The bad news is that our ship has begun to sink.
The good news is that we shall win eleven Academy Awards.”

Did you hear that spandex got nominated for an academy award?
It’s for best-supporting roles.

Why did the Oscar statue break up with his girlfriend?
Because she kept calling him “my little golden man”.

What’s a cannibalistic actor’s favorite meal?
An Oscar Nom.

Recommended: Cannibal Jokes

Why don’t p*rn movies win the Oscars?
Because the plots are full of holes.

Did you hear that the actresses at the Oscars had a wonderful night celebrating empowerment and female achievement by giving moving speeches and swilling champagne?
Apparently, it’s good for getting rid of the taste of salty producer cum.

Do you have funny Oscars jokes? Post your own Oscars puns in the comment section below!

What do you think?

Written by Jessica Amlee

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Known for her sharp wit and clever wordplay, Jessica has authored several popular joke books. A regular at stand-up comedy clubs, she never fails to leave her audience in stitches. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *