Native Americans, known for their rich cultural heritage and deep-rooted history, are a significant part of the United States’ fabric. Each tribe, with its unique traditions, languages, and beliefs, contributes to the diverse tapestry of the nation. However, they have often been subjected to stereotypes and misconceptions, ranging from their portrayal in media to popular myths about their lifestyle. These stereotypes, while widely recognized as outdated and inaccurate, still linger in some areas of popular culture. The challenge lies in navigating these stereotypes responsibly, understanding their impact, and appreciating the real and vibrant cultures of Native American communities.
Jokes about Native Americans, therefore, tread a very delicate line. They need to be shared with a deep sense of respect and awareness, avoiding the reinforcement of harmful stereotypes. So think twice before sharing these with your adult friends in circle.
Best Native American Jokes
Why do Native Americans hate snow?
Because it’s white and settles on their land.
An old Indian walks into a bank and asks for a $5000 loan.
Clerk: What are you going to do with the money?
Indian: I’m going to go into the city and sell my handmade jewelry.
Clerk: Do you have collateral?
Indian: What’s collateral?
Clerk: Collateral is something of value that can cover the amount of the loan. For example, do you have a car?
Indian: Yes, I have a 1949 Ford truck
Clerk: That won’t do. Do you have livestock?
Indian: Yes, I have a horse
Clerk: How old is it?
Indian: I don’t know, it doesn’t have teeth.
After some negotiations, the Indian and the clerk settle on collateral. The clerk does all the paperwork and gives the Indian $5000.
A few weeks later, the Indian returns to the bank, walks up to the same clerk, takes out a huge wad of bills and returns the loan.
Clerk: I see your jewelry sold well. What are you going to do with the rest of the money?
Indian: I will keep it in my teepee.
Clerk: No need to do that. You can make a deposit in our bank.
Indian: What’s a deposit?
Clerk: A deposit is when you give money to the bank, the bank cares for it, and when it’s time, you can come back to the bank and take your money.
Indian (after thinking for a moment): And what does the bank have as collateral?
Did you know ‘Vegetarian’ is a Native American word?
It means ‘Lousy Hunter.’
Why do Native Americans have reservations?
Because those treaties just seem too good to be true.
Two Indians are walking beside a river.
One reaches down into the mud and runs it through his fingers.
“The White Man was here.”
“How can you tell?”
“We’re speaking English.”
A Native American, Pirate, and Frenchman walk into a bar.
The bartender walks over and says, “Gentlemen, hau, arrrrrrr, oui, today?”
What do you call a native Alaskan eye doctor?
An Optical Aleutian.
When NASA was preparing for the Apollo project, they did some astronaut training on a Navajo Indian reservation.
One day, a Navajo elder and his son were herding sheep and came across the space crew. The old man, who only spoke Navajo, asked a question, which the son translated, “What are the guys in the big suits doing?”
A member of the crew said they were practicing for their trip to the moon. The old man got really excited and asked if he could send a message to the moon with the astronauts.
Recognizing a promotional opportunity for the spin-doctors, the NASA folks found a tape recorder.
After the old man recorded his message, they asked the son to translate. He refused. So the NASA reps brought the tape to the reservation, where the rest of the tribe listened and laughed, but refused to translate the elder’s message to the moon.
Finally, NASA called in an official government translator. He reported that the moon message said: “Watch out for these guys; they’ve come to steal your land.”
How can you tell India’s Indians from Native American Indians?
One smells like curry, the other smells like extinction.
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A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized She was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out. “Business trip or pleasure?”
She turned, smiled, and said, “Business. I’m going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston.”
He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen Sitting next to him and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs!
Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked. “What’s your Business at this convention?”
“Lecturer.” She responded. “I use information that I have learned from my Personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.”
“Really?” He said. “And what kind of myths are there?”
“Well.” She explained. “One popular myth is that African-American men are The most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is That Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Mexican Descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with Absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck.”
Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed.. “I’m Sorry.” She said, “I shouldn’t really be discussing all of this with you. I don’t even know your name.”
“Tonto.” The man said. “Tonto Gonzales, but my friends call me Bubba.”
Why don’t American Indian restaurants take reservations?
Because white folks never honor them.
Did you hear that Land O’Lakes got rid of the Native American on their package?
But kept the land. Sounds oddly familiar.
Did you hear that Prince wrote a song about Native American rice?
It’s called Purple Grain.
A man and his family walk into a bar.
Inside of the bar, the man’s youngest child sees a Native American sitting under a sign stating “World’s longest memory”. The child walks up to the sign and decides to test if this sign is true. The child asks “What did you have for breakfast 30 years ago?” The Native American states, “Eggs.” The child states that the native could have just made that up, and then later leaves the bar.
Years later, when the child returns back with his own family he sees the same native at the bar. Walking up to the man, he states a stereotypical “how!” The Native replies, “Scrambled.”
Why do Native Americans hate April?
Because April showers bring May Flowers, and Mayflowers bring white people.
Did you hear of the Indigenous Superman?
Before taking off, he could be heard saying, “Up, up, anyway…”
What does a pirate say when greeting his indigenous buddy?
“Ahoy, Métis!”
A Native American is laying on the road with his ear on the ground and says, “It´s a red Mazda, aluminum wheels, license plate number…”
A man walks nearby, “Wow, that´s amazing, how do you know?” Native American replies, “I was run over by it!”
What does a Native American Biologist live in?
ATP.
What happens when you hire indigenous women to clean your house?
Ethnic cleansing.
An Indian shaman dies and his only student isn’t very good but he can’t let his people down so when they ask him if snow is coming he tells them.
“I must go and speak with the spirits. All of you cut firewood until I get back though just in case.” And so the whole tribe begins cutting wood and the new shaman goes to “Talk with the spirits” by walking through the woods, crossing the highway, finding a payphone, and calling the weather service.
“Will it snow soon?” He asks.
“Yes” they reply, and it looks like it’ll be very bad.
So he crosses back over the highway and through the woods back to his tribe.
“The spirits have spoken!” He told them “The snow will be coming soon and be very bad, we must prepare and cut more lumber!”
For the next week, the tribe works night and day cutting firewood. No snow came and they approached the new shaman again.
“We see no signs of snow” they cried “The spirits must be wrong. Please go and make sure they said it would snow.”
“I will go and speak with the spirits again. All of you cut firewood until I get back though just in case.” And so the whole tribe continues cutting wood and the new shaman goes to “Talk with the spirits” by walking through the woods, crossing the highway, finding a payphone, and calling the weather service.
“Are you sure it will snow soon?” He asks.
“Yes” they reply, and it looks like it’ll be very bad. Much worse than we thought the first time.”
So he crosses back over the highway and through the woods back to his tribe.
“It will be a terrible snow! We must work harder to ensure our survival this winter!” He told the tribe. And so the tribe worked even harder, clearing the land for firewood but still the snow never came.
A week later the the tribe approached the shaman again.
“Surely this must be enough firewood, we’ve cut down so many of our trees, and still no snow. Please make sure the spirits are correct.”
“I must go and speak with the spirits. All of you cut firewood until I get back though just in case.” And so the whole tribe begins cutting wood and the new shaman goes to “Talk with the spirits” by walking through the woods, crossing the highway, finding a payphone, and calling the weather service.
“Are you positive it will snow soon?” He asks.
“Yes, dreadfully bad! Impossibly bad!” they reply.
“How can you tell it will be so bad?” He asks
“Well our maps don’t show a cloud in the sky but the local Indian tribe has cut down half a damn forest for firewood!”
Did you hear about that Native American who drank ten cups of tea one night?
They found him dead the next day in his teepee.
How many native Americans does it take to change a light bulb?
About seven. One to change the bulb, six to sing the song.
A Native American walks into an Old West saloon followed shortly by a bear.
The patrons freeze in fear, and the saloonkeeper points to the Native American man and whispers, “There’s a bear right behind you!”
The Native American man holds up a calm hand and says, “I can explain. Bear with me.”
Why was the Native American bartender fired?
He kept charging $24 for a Manhattan.
Why did the Native American leave the Arctic?
He wasn’t inuit.
A Native American shaman had an apprentice.
One day the apprentice said to his mentor, “You take a long trip. I try to be a shaman for summer.”
The shaman asked, “Why should I take a trip?”
The apprentice tried bribery. “If you take a trip, I feed you belly full.”
The shaman agreed, so the apprentice gave his mentor a big meal, and the next day the shaman left on his long trip.
But the apprentice turned out to be a terrible shaman. Within a week, the chief could not take it anymore and left to search for the old shaman. He found him and begged, “Please come back to the tribe.”
The shaman asked, “Why should I come back?”
The chief tried bribery. “If you come back, I feed you belly full.”
The shaman agreed, so they both went back, and the chief gave the shaman a big meal.
When the apprentice saw his mentor had returned, he asked, “Why back so soon?”
The old shaman explained, “Full me once, shaman you. Full me twice, shaman me.”
Did you also know Michael Jackson was part Native American?
He was a quarter Cherok-HEE-HEE.
A man was viewing a house being sold by a native American.
He asked him if it came with running water,
The native said, “no, get your own wife!”
Did you hear about the Native American friend’s son who is going through puberty?
He has Apache beard.
Once there was a native american named Lakota. All his tribe had normal teepees shaped like cones. But Lakota, repeatedly trying as he might could not make a normal teepee. Instead, his teepee was very strange and shaped like a cube.
One day he went to an elder and asked, “Why no matter how hard I try, can I not make a normal cone-shaped teepee? It always comes out weird and in the shape of a cube.”
“Well,” spoke the elder. “These times have been dry and our crops have been in danger. Have you participated in a rain dance and tried to help our tribe?”
“Of course,” answered Lakota. “But why is my teepee not a cone? Why does it have such square sides? Why is being in my teepee strange and like being surrounded by squares?” He was very upset. In the dark of night, the elder was unsure if a tear had formed and fallen on Lakota’s cheek.
“Hmmm,” sighed the elder. “Let’s just see your rain dance, son!”
“Ok,” relented Lakota. “But I don’t understand what this has to do with my teepee being so square?” And with passion, Lakota danced the greatest rain dance he ever could muster.
“—Lakota!” The elder Interrupted. “That’s not a rain dance.”
“It’s not!” Cried Lakota.
“No, Lakota, that’s not a rain dance. This whole time you’ve just been square dancing.”
Why was the Native American embarrassed after using the bathroom?
He looked down and realized he had some teepee stuck to his foot.
Which Native American tribe is best at unlocking fruit?
The Cherry-Key.
A big city doctor visits a Native American tribe full of men and he asks “How do you guys relieve your sexual tension?”
“Simple, just come down to the river tomorrow and we’ll show you.” The next day the doctor shows up and sees a group of men near a donkey. One man says “Since you’re our guest you get to go first.” The doctor not wanting to go against custom starts to kiss, then proceeds to have sex with the donkey. Then a man in the group asks “Are you almost done Doc? We need the donkey to cross the river in order to get to the tribe of women.”
What kind of tree protects the Native American Hogwarts?
A wampum Willow.
What’s the favorite breakfast cereal of anthropologists who study Native American homosexuality?
Fruity Pueblos.
A Native American Chief had three wives, all of whom were pregnant. The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated that he built her a teepee made of deer hide. A few days later, the second gave birth to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made of antelope hide.
The third wife gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details a secret. He built this one a two-story teepee, made out of a hippopotamus hide. The chief then challenged the tribe to guess what had occurred.
Many tried, unsuccessfully. Finally, one young brave declared that the third wife had given birth to twin boys. “Correct,” said the chief. “How did you figure it out?”
The warrior answered, “It’s elementary. The value of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.”
What brand of modem do native American Indians use?
Tipi-Link.
How did Native Americans describe their farming?
They said it was A-maize-ing.
A redneck is hiking through the woods with two Native Americans. They happen across a cave. One of the Natives yells, “Whoop! Whoop!”
Another voice calls from the cave. “Whoop! Whoop!”
The man strips naked and runs into the cave.
“What was all that about?” The redneck asks.
The other Native explains, “It’s our mating ritual. A woman who is ready to mate will wait in a cave. If we come across a cave, we yell inside. If we hear a callback, we know we can go in and mate with her.”
A few minutes later, they come across another cave. “Whoop! Whoop!”
“Whoop! Whoop!”
Without hesitation, the second Native took off his clothes and ran inside.
All alone, the redneck continued on his way. Eventually, he came across a very large cave. There must be a large, beautiful woman in here! He thought. “Whoop! Whoop!”
“WHOOOOP! WHOOOOOP!”
Wow, she’s got a voice. Sounds like she’s larger and more beautiful than I imagined! He strips off his clothes and runs into the cave.
The next day, the headline in the newspaper read:
NAKED REDNECK RUN OVER BY TRAIN.
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What did the Native American say to the man who had just shown him his very first magic trick?
“How?”
What would a Native American use to fix a hole in their pants?
Apache.
There once lived a strong, Native American man who had only one testicle.
Everyone in the village called him “One stone” because of this, but nobody dared to say it to his face because he would kill anyone who directly said it to him. Unfortunately, a woman in the village named Bluebird did not know about this. One morning, while she was walking past One Stone, she greeted him by saying “Hello, One Stone”. He immediately took her into the woods and made love to her until she died from exhaustion.
Another woman by the name of Yellowbird, who also did not know about One Stone’s hatred of his nickname, greeted him one morning, saying “Hi, One Stone!”. Once again, One Stone took her into the woods and made love to her all day and night, but she didn’t die. Why?
Because you can’t kill two birds with one stone.
Did the Native Americans hunt bear?
No, they hunted with clothes on.
What did the Native American pirate say when asked about his heritage?
“Arrrrrr Métis!”
A cowboy and a Native American are riding horseback out on the frontier.
The Native American stops his horse, jumps off, and puts his ear to the ground.
He looks up at the cowboy and says, “Ah, buffalo come.”
The cowboy looks around and then back at the Native, “That’s amazing, how the hell do you know that?”
The Native replies, “My ear is pretty sticky.”
How do you say Intercourse in Native American?
Poke a twat a lot.
What do natives and Jews have in common?
They both send smoke signals
A native American hitchhiker was picked up by a slick city man who was driving past the reservation.
As they were driving along, the Indian noticed a brown paper bag on the dashboard and inquired as to its contents. The city man replied: “It’s a bottle of wine, I got it for my wife.”
The Indian looked forward at the road, nodded his head solemnly, and said, “Good trade.”
Do Native Americans celebrate Thanksgiving?
They did… once.
What do you call an indigenous person who can’t stop giving out his two cents?
Opinionative.
There’s an old Native American man who sits in a teepee along the road this man used to take to work.
Every morning for a while now he stopped in and asked him what the weather would be that day. Rain, snow, sun, clouds. He’s always right.
Well, yesterday he stopped in just like normal and asked what the weather was going to be like.
“Got no clue”, the native man said.
The man was shocked. “What’s different about today that you don’t know?”
He just shook his head sadly, “Radio broke.”
Never be racist towards Native Americans.
They will Sioux you.
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A woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Arizona when her car broke down. An American Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town.
She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful, except that every few minutes the Indian would let out a Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!’ so loud that it echoed from the surrounding hills and canyon walls.
When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station, yelled one final ‘Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!’ and rode off.
“What did you do to get that Indian so excited?” asked the service-station attendant. “Nothing,” the woman answered “I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto the saddle horn so I wouldn’t fall off.”
“Lady,” the attendant said, “Indians don’t use saddles.”
Do you know why Native American sex is so hot?
It’s f*cking in tents.
Why do Native Americans make the best strippers?
Because every time they dance they make it rain.
A Native American and his son were having a talk.
The son asked, “Dad, how do we Indians get our names?”
“You see my son, we name our children after what happens when they come into the world. Your sister was named ‘Little Thunder’ because a thunderstorm was ongoing. And your brother was named ‘Sitting Eagle’ because an eagle was sitting on our tipi.”
“But what about me?”
“Enough questions, broken rubber.”
What do you call a Native American sl*t?
A Navahoe.
What is the Native American name for a lesbian with diarrhea?
Runs with Scissors.
Did you know that the Brits introduced an*l to Indigenous people?
It’s all part of colon-ialism.
Do you have a funny joke about Native Americans? Write down your own adult jokes in the comment section below!
