70 Funny Redneck Jokes for a Good Laugh

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Jessica Amlee

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The term “redneck” is a slang term used in the United States to describe a working-class rural white person, often with a negative or derogatory connotation. It is associated with rural, agricultural communities in the Southern United States, and is often used to describe someone who is perceived as being uneducated, politically conservative, and holding traditional values. 

People crack jokes about different groups, including rednecks, as a way to make light of certain stereotypes and cultural traits associated with that group. Jokes can be used as a form of humor and a way to bring people together through shared laughter. However, it’s important to be mindful of how these jokes can also perpetuate negative stereotypes and marginalize certain groups.

Funny Redneck Jokes

Why are redneck murders so hard to solve?
There’s no dental records and all the DNA matches.

What happens when a redneck from the UK goes to the USA?
Avg IQ of both countries increases.

What’s the difference between a fairy tale and a redneck tale?
Fairy tales begin with “Once upon a time…”, while redneck tales begin with “Y’all ain’t gonna believe this shit…”

What do you get when 32 rednecks enter the same room?
A full set of teeth.

What’s the last thing you hear before a redneck dies?
“Hey y’all, watch this!”

What do a redneck and yeast have in common?
They are both “in-bread.”

What do a tornado, a hurricane, and a redneck divorce have in common?
Somebody’s gonna lose their trailer.

What does a redneck Buddhist believe in?

How did the redneck find the sheep in the tall grass

What does it mean when a redneck’s baby drools out of both sides of its mouth?
The trailer is level.

How did NASCAR get that name?
Redneck: ‘That’s nascar ye got there.”

What do a 14-year-old redneck and her unborn baby have in common?
The Father.

How do redneck aliens abduct people?
Tractor beam.

What’s a redneck’s favorite part of archaeology?
Relative dating.

Two rednecks were fishing when one asked the other, “If I slept with your wife, would that make us like family?”
His friend replied, “No, that make us even.”

Two rednecks took a hunting trip to Canada.
They hired a tiny jet to fly them into the Rockies for a week of moose hunting.
They were able to collect six. As they were loading the plane to return, the pilot informed them that the plane could only carry four moose.
The two guys were vehemently opposed. “We shot six last year. The pilot allowed us to take them all, and he was flying the same plane as you.”
The pilot reluctantly agreed, and all six were loaded. The plane lifted off. However, while attempting to cross some mountains, the small plane couldn’t bear the load and crashed.
Only the two rednecks survived the crash, despite being surrounded by moose bodies.
After climbing out of the wreckage, Billy Ray asked Billy Bob, “Any idea where we
Billy Bob replied, “I think we’re pretty close to where we crashed last year.”

What do you call the sweat produced when two rednecks are making love?
Relative Humidity.

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What’s a redneck’s favorite dating website?

Why did the redneck get colored pencils before he got his flu shot?
He heard that vaccines can make you artistic.

What do you have when you get 32 rednecks in a line?
A full set of teeth.

Two rednecks decided that they weren’t going anywhere in life and thought they should go to college to get ahead. The first goes in to see the counselor, who tells him to take Math, History, and Logic.
“What’s Logic?” the first redneck asks.
The professor answers by saying, “Let me give you an example.”
“Do you own a weedeater?”
“I sure do.”
“Then I can assume, using logic, that you have a yard,” replied the professor.
“That’s real good!” says the redneck.
The professor continues, “Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also own a house.”
Impressed, the redneck says, “Amazin!”
“And since you own a house, logic dictates that you have a wife.”
“That’s Betty Mae! This is incredible!” The redneck is obviously catching on.
“Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you are heterosexual,” said the professor.
“You’re absolutely right! Why that’s the most fascinatin’ thing I ever heard! I can’t wait to take that logic class!!”
The redneck, proud of the new world opening up to him, walks back into the hallway, where his friend is still waiting.
“So what classes are ya takin’?” asks the friend.
“Math, History, and Logic!” replies the first redneck.
“What in tarnation is logic???” asked his friend.
“Let me give you an example. Do ya own a weedeater?” asked the first redneck.
“No,” his friend replied.

How does a Redneck find his sister in the woods?

Why do rednecks love sandwiches?
Because they’re inbred too.

How do you know you are a real redneck?
You let your 12 yr old daughter smoke in front of her kids.

Why do rednecks cut their sleeves off?
They have the right to bare arms.

How can a redneck tell his twin sisters apart?
By taste.

Two rednecks are looking at their guns.
“I keep these around for hunting, home protection, and to defend my 2nd amendment rights,” one says.
“I just like shooting cans,” says the second.
“Wow, that’s a lot of firepower only to shoot cans.”
“Well, there are so many of them: Mexi-cans, Afri-cans, Puerto Ri-cans, and so on…”

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A redneck walks into a restaurant with his wife, sister, and cousin.
He walks up to the host and says, “Table for two please!”

Did you hear about the redneck magician?
He turns a 12 pack of beer into domestic violence.

How many rednecks does it take to eat a ‘possum?
Two. One to eat and one to watch for cars.

Why did the transgender redneck move to California in 1848?
Because there was gold up in them/their hills.

A redneck couple had had enough after the birth of their ninth child since they couldn’t afford a larger bed. The husband went to the veterinarian and requested that his dog be snipped. “Me and my cousin don’t want any more children.”
The vet said he could get a vasectomy, but it would be pricey. “There is a less expensive option,” the vet explained. “Go home, find a cherry bomb, light it up, and place it in a Coors Lite can, then count to ten.”
“I ain’t no rocket surgeon,” the redneck admitted, “but how’s that going to help me?”
“Trust me.” said the vet.
So the redneck went home, drained a beer then stuffed a lit cherry bomb in the empty can. He brought it up to his ear and began to count:
“1… 2… 3… 4… 5…”
Once he got to five, he stopped for a second, put the can between his legs, and resumed the count on his other hand.

How does a redneck tenderize his meat?
He puts his pickup truck in reverse.

What makes redneck family reunions so awkward?
Seeing all of your ex’s there.

What would a redneck call a Cervidae that can’t see?
“No eye deer!”

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What do you call rednecks up north?

A redneck’s father died peacefully in his sleep.
So, the next morning, he calls 911 to have the body picked up.
The 911 operator assured him that someone would be dispatched immediately.
“Can you tell me where you live?” inquired the operator.
“At the end of Eucalyptus Drive,” he said.
“Can you spell that for me?” inquired the operator.
There was a long pause and finally, he said, “How ’bout if I drag him over to Oak Street and you pick him up there?”

What did the Redneck Hurricane say to Florida?
“Irma get you!”

Why did the redneck bring a bazooka deer hunting?
He wanted to get the biggest bang for his buck.

Why didn’t the redneck leave the yoga class when it was over?
On his way out he said, “See you next week.”
The instructor responded, “Namaste,” and the redneck said. “Oh. Then I’m-a-stayin too.”

What do you call a group of redneck superheroes?
The inbredibles.

3 rednecks were working on a cell tower.
Cooter, Ronnie, and Donnie. As they start their descent, Cooter slips, falls off the tower, and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, Ronnie says, “Well, shucks, someone should go and tell his wife.”
Donnie says, “OK, I’m pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I’ll do it.” Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser.
Ronnie says, “Where did you get that beer, Donnie?”
“Cooter’s wife gave it to me.”
“That’s unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?”
“Well, not exactly,” Donnie says. “When she answered the door, I said to her that she must be Cooter’s widow.”
She said, “You must be mistaken. I’m not a widow.”
Then I said, “I’ll bet you a case of Budweiser you are.”

What did the redneck say when his wife begged him to sell his boat and cut his hair?
“Let me mullet over”

What’s a redneck’s favorite beer?
An open one.

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What is a redneck’s favorite car?

Two old rednecks were sitting outside of a gas station.
Between them there was an old hound dog laying on the concrete, licking it’s balls.
One redneck was looking at the dog and said “I really wish I could do that!”
The other redneck looks down and says, “Well, you can try, but he’ll probably bite ya.”

What do rednecks in Star Wars do?
They Chew-Backa.

Have you heard about the redneck militia?
They call themselves Lee John, “For we are many.”

How do you know the tooth brush was invented by rednecks?
Anyone else would of called it a teethbrush.

A redneck went to the hospital while his wife was giving birth. When he arrived, the nurse exclaimed, “Congratulations, your wife has had quintuplets, 5 big baby boys.”
According to the redneck “This does not surprise me. My penis is the size of a chimney.”
The nurse replied, “You might want to get it cleaned because they are all black.”

Why are redneck houses bland looking?
Because they hate color.

Why did the redneck only stink on one side?
Because he didn’t know where to find Left Guard.

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What do you call a redneck UPS driver?

A guy walks into a bar in Redneck county and orders a white wine.
Everybody sitting around the bar looks up, surprised and the bartender looks around and says: “You ain’t from around here, are ya… where ya from, boy?”
The guy says, “I’m from England.”
The bartender asks, “What th’ hell you do in England?”
The guy responds, “I’m a taxidermist.”
The bartender asks, “A taxidermist… now just what th’ hell is a taxidermist?”
The guy says, “I mount animals.”
The bartender grins and shouts out to the whole bar, “It’s okay boys, he’s one of us!”

What do you call a redneck superhero, who can become invisible?

What do you call a sad, shirtless redneck?
Red, white, and blue.

What do you call a redneck that are mean to feet?
A heelbully.

A pregnant woman is involved in a vehicle accident and falls into a coma.
She awakens after nearly six months to discover that she is no longer pregnant.
She frantically inquires of the doctor about her baby.
The physician replies, “You had twins, ma’am! A girl and a boy. The infants are fine. Your brother came in and named them, and he does appear to be a bit of a redneck!”
“Oh no, not my brother!” the woman thinks to herself. “Well, what’s the girl’s name?” she asks the doctor, expecting the worst.
“Denise,” the doctor says.
The new mother thinks, “Wow, that’s not such a bad name! I like Denise!”
Then she asks the doctor, “What’s the boy’s name?”
The doctor replies, “Denephew.”

Why did the redneck love his Pathfinders sexy new steering wheel?
Because it turns his Nissan.

Why was the redneck boy sad?
He got sibling zoned.

What do you call a piñata at a redneck’s birthday party?

A farmer has triplets, and they’re getting ready for prom night.
The first date arrives, and in redneck tradition, the farmer greets him with a shotgun in hand. The boy tells the farmer, “My name is Teddy, I’m here to pick up Betty, we’re going to get spaghetti, is she ready?” The farmer looks the boy over and then calls Betty to go with him.
The second date arrives and greeted by shotgun, nervously states, “My name is Joe, I’m here for Flo. We’re gonna see a show, can she go?” The farmer thinks for a moment, then lets Flo go with Joe.
The night’s third suitor rings the bell. He says, “My name is Chuck-” and the farmer shoots him.

Why do rednecks only go to the local strip club?
They get a family discount.

A redneck wrestler has beaten every opponent he’s faced and is now going global. His coach sits him down before the match against the Russian champion.
“Now, look at how much faster and more agile you are than this person. He’s huge and strong, but if you keep going and let him tire himself out, you’ll be able to beat him.”
“Got it, coach,” the wrestler says.
“One more thing,” the coach adds. “He has a hold called the Pretzel Hold that no one has ever been able to escape from. Whatever happens, don’t allow him to put you in the Pretzel Hold, otherwise, it’ll be game over.”
“Got it, coach,” the wrestler says. “Avoid the Pretzel Hold.”
The match begins, and the redneck is in the Pretzel Hold in five seconds. The American spectators groan, and the coach puts his face in his hands, unable to watch.
The crowd erupts in cheers and congratulations after hearing a thunderous yell and thump from the mat. When the coach looks up, he sees the Russian on the ground and the redneck standing over him. The crowd rushes in and hoists the redneck into the air, celebrating his victory, before he can even enter the ring.
After half an hour, the coach and the redneck are alone and able to talk.
“Well, I don’t know how he got me in the hold so quickly, but once I was in it, I was pretty much unable to move anything but my head,” adds the redneck. “So I looked up to see a pair of testicles dangling in front of my face. So I did the only thing I knew how to do. I jerked my neck forward and frowned.”
“Ah, so that’s how you beat him?” the coach asked.
“Not exactly,” said the wrestler. “You’d be surprised how much strength you have when you’ve just bitten down on your own testicles.”

What do rednecks do on Halloween?

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What’s the difference between a jack-o-lantern and a redneck?
A jack-o-lantern has more teeth, and is usually a little a brighter.

When a redneck on his honeymoon is about to make love, his wife says, “Wait a minute, honey, I have something I need you to know. I am a virgin.”
“WTF?” The man yells, hits her in the face, and knocks her out. He wraps her in bedsheets, pulls her down the stairs and out the door, throws her in the back of his pickup truck, and drives over to her father’s house, where he dumps her in the yard.
The man then drives to his father’s house and enters. When the father sees his kid, he exclaims, “What are you doing here, boy? I thought you were meant to be with your new bride?”
“Well, pa,” says the son, “I was, but she said she’s still a virgin.”
“Well, holy dog-shit, what did you do then?” asks the father.
“I struck her in the face and knocked her out, covered her in sheets, dragged her down the stairs and out the door, tossed her in the back of my pick-up truck, and then drove to her daddy’s house and dumped her on the lawn.”
The dad starts laughing, and, patting his son on the back, he says, “Good job, son. If she ain’t good enough for her family, I say she ain’t good enough for ours neither.”

How do you circumcise a redneck?
Kick his sister in the jaw.

Why don’t rednecks do the reverse cowgirl?
They never turn their back on family.

Have a better redneck joke? Post your own redneck puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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