40 FC Barcelona Jokes You Cannot Share With A Cule

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Jessica Amlee

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FC Barcelona, or Barça to its fans, is more than just a football club; it’s a symbol of Catalan pride and passion. Based in Barcelona, Spain, this team isn’t just known for playing football; they’re known for reinventing it. Their style of play, famously dubbed ‘tiki-taka’, involves a mesmerizing dance of the ball, with players seemingly weaving magic as they pass. The club’s history is littered with legendary players, from Johan Cruyff to Lionel Messi, who don’t just kick the ball; they make it sing. Barça’s motto, ‘Més que un club’ (More than a club), really sums it up. When things aren’t going well, these high expectations might be plenty fodder for jokes.

FC Barcelona jokes, then, are a playful way to poke fun at this iconic team’s larger-than-life image. These jokes might rib on the team’s dramatics on the pitch or their fans’ undying devotion, which can sometimes border on the obsessive. It’s all in good fun, of course. Sharing a Barça joke is like joining in on a global conversation, where football is the language and laughter is the currency. It’s a chance for fans and especially rivals like Real Madrid to bond over the lighter side of the beautiful game, where even a missed goal or a fumbled pass can be a source of chuckles.

Funny Barca Jokes

What do Barcelona FC and a dog walker with Parkinson’s have in common?
Neither of them can hold a lead.

Why should Gavi switch to poker?
Bluffing seems to be his strong suit. At least there, a yellow card wouldn’t get him suspensions or sent offs!

What is the difference between Xavi and Rihanna?
Xavi is getting more knocks in Europe than Rihanna got from Chris Brown.

Pedri’s become the resident expert at physiotherapy clinics.
Maybe they should give him a lifetime membership as a ‘thank you’!

Did you hear that Xavi feels h*rny before ElClásico?
That is why Real Madrid F*cked him.

Where are the most fans of Barcelona?
In Spain but ‘S’ is silent.

Xavi must be saving Ferran for the big games,
Like family dinners with Luis Enrique! One misplaced pass and it’s a lifetime of washing dishes.

Who was the latest victim of the Drake Curse?

Did you hear about the new club in Catalonia?
They are called FC Barcelever.

What would have happened if Pique was playing for Sidemen FC?
Even Speed’s goal would have been counted.

What do you call a guy from Barcelona without a car?

Did Barca forget to pay the refs again today?
Hard to pay when you have no money.

What should you never ask a man? His salary.
A woman? Her age.
And Barcelona fans? About what they did with Neymar’s money.

Barcelona Dressing Room Meme

Did you hear that the Official FC Barcelona store can’t print Lewandowski jerseys because they are out of ‘W’ letter?
Some jokes just write themselves.

Why did the soccer ball go to the team’s party?
Because it heard ter Stegen might not catch it!

What is Ferran Torres doing at the bench?
Thinking of ways to kidnap Dembele.

Barcelona FC Meme on Football

What is the difference between you and Barcelona?
None, both will watch Tuesday night football sitting at home.

Did you hear that Xavi is such a good coach that he generally takes his players to dinner?
On Thursday nights.

What do this season’s European results mean for Barcelona?
They will be soon Brokelona again.

What do you get when you remove 99 from 100?
Lewandowski’s finishing on FIFA 24.

Recommended: FIFA Jokes

What are the Cules listening to on Spotify?
Europa League Anthem.

Did you hear that Barcelona is activating the fifth lever?
Europa League lever.

How does Barcelona handle Pique?
With Piqué they have to be calm as there will always be goals.

What is the most googled term in Catalonia?
“Why the Europa League is better than the Champions League?”

What is the only break Barca fans hate?
International break.

There are rumors that Laporta is furious with Xavi. Xavi is furious with some players, and the players are furious with everyone.
The players: Biscuits, Pigass, Albass, and Roberslow.

Did hear about another record broken by Pedri?
First golden boy to play in the Europa League back to back.

Why did Frenkie de Jong join FC Barcelona?
To become a Europa League Benchwarmer.

Why is Gavi so highly rated?
Because his name rhymes with Xavi.

What happens when Barcelona wins UCL?
Nothing, cule switches off the Xbox.

What do Barca fans use as birth control?
Their personalities.

Have you heard about the Barcelona footballer who was arrested for tax evasion?
His tax returns were alleged to be Messi.

Why would Barcelona players not gonna eat anything till morning?
Remembering they 8-2 much few years ago.

Liverpool is a good team, but have you seen Barcelona?
They’re out of their league.

Recommended: Liverpool Jokes

What do FC Barcelona and Man Utd have in common?
Both play a bunch of Young Boys and lost.

My friend was visiting from Barcelona, and he asked me if he could crash on my couch.
I wasn’t expecting some kind of Spanish imposition!

The teacher is asking everyone in the class what jobs their parents have, and she comes to Jimmy next.
Teacher: What does your father do?
Jimmy: He works as a stripper in a h*mosexual bar and frequently allows other men to touch his privates.
Jimmy is taken to one side by the teacher after class.
Teacher: Is it correct about your father?
Jimmy: No, he’s an FC Barcelona player, but I was too embarrassed to say so.

What do Barcelona fans do when their team wins UCL?
They turn off their PlayStation 5.

Have a better joke about FC Barcelona? Post your puns in the comments below.

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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