40 Funny Lent Jokes And Puns to Make Your Season Brighter

Funny Lent Jokes And Puns
Funny Lent Jokes

Lent is a solemn and reflective time for Christians around the world. It spans for 40 days, beginning on Ash Wednesday and ending on Holy Thursday (the day before Good Friday) in the Christian faith. However, that doesn’t mean we can’t take a break from the seriousness and enjoy some good-natured humor. That’s where lent jokes come in – a perfect way to lighten up the mood during this holy season. From puns to one-liners, there are plenty of ways to bring a smile to your face while still maintaining the reverence and meaning of lent.

Our blog on lent jokes is the ultimate compilation of humor, bringing you the funniest and most wholesome jokes that are perfect for sharing with family and friends. So, let’s embrace the season with some laughter and joy, and remember that even in the solemnity of lent, there’s always room for a good laugh!

Best Lent Jokes

Did you hear that Chris is giving up negativity for lent?
We’ll see how long that lasts.

Why can’t muggers catch Catholics during Lent?
They fast.

What do you guys think of the idea to abstain from working with spreadsheets for 40 days before Easter?
Because personally, it’s Excel Lent.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Alma who?)
Alma-ty who’s giving up sweets for Lent!

What did you give up for Lent?

Lent is always a hard time for the Catholic woodworker. He can’t clamp anything in place while he works.
He had to give up his vises.

Did you notice that every time you’re at a restaurant during lent?
The menu always seems a little fishy.

Did you fail to keep your New Year’s resolution?
Well, then, lent is the best opportunity to fail at it again.

Why did the priest go to the gym during Lent?
To do some cross-fitness.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Nun who?)
Nun of your business what I’m giving up for Lent!

What’s Rick Astley giving up for lent?
Not you.

Why did the chicken refuse to eat meat during Lent?
Because it was poultry in motion!

John Smith was the sole Protestant to settle in the predominantly Catholic area.
On the first Friday of Lent, John was outdoors on his grill, preparing a large delicious steak. Meanwhile, his neighbors were all having cold tuna fish for dinner. This happened every Friday throughout Lent.
The neighborhood men came together on the last Friday of Lent and decided that something had to be done about John since he was luring them to eat meat every Friday of Lent and they couldn’t stand it any longer. They planned to convert him to Catholicism. They went over to chat with him and were overjoyed when he decided to join the rest of his neighbors and become a Catholic.
They took him to church and the priest poured some water over him and told him “Your were born a Baptist, you were raised a Baptist and now you are a Catholic”. The males in the area were overjoyed since their biggest Lent temptation had been eliminated.
Lent came around again the following year. The first Friday of Lent arrived, and just as the community was settling down to their fish meals, the wafting aroma of steak frying on a barbecue arrived. The males in the area couldn’t believe their eyes! What was the situation? They contacted each other and agreed to meet in John’s yard to check if he had forgotten it was Lent Friday.
The group arrived just in time to see John standing over his grill with a small pitcher of water. He was pouring small droplets over his steak on the grill and saying, “You were born a cow, you were raised a cow, and now you are a fish.”

What do you call an Easter bunny on skates?
A Lent roller.

Recommended: Easter Jokes

Why is Lent the best time of the year to run a marathon?
Because that’s when you fast.

What do you call a group of Lent observers who are always hungry?
The fasting and the furious.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Fish who?)
Fish you a happy Lenten season filled with blessings and peace!

Why couldn’t the priest find his rosary?
Because it was Lent.

Why did the baker give up bread for Lent?
He kneaded a break.

Outside of mass hours, a man walks into a church and finds the priest.
“Give me all you have,” he says as he pulls out a revolver.
The priest becomes terrified and hastily searches his pockets.
He doesn’t have any money on him, but he discovers some wrapped candy and holds it out, saying, “I’m sorry. This is all I’ve got!”
“But Father, I gave up candy during Lent!” says the burglar.

Don’t you think there should be a holiday where we remember all the borrowed items we’ve given out that have never been returned?
We’ll call it ‘Lent.’

What do you call a person who gives up their favorite TV show for Lent?
A sacrifan.

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Cross who?)
Cross your fingers that you can stick to your Lenten resolutions this year!

What does the Pope eat during Lent?
Holy mackerel!

Why did the musician give up playing the drums for Lent?
Because he wanted to beat temptation.

It was a young couple’s wedding night, and as the night progressed, the bride became increasingly eager to consummate their marriage.
“Uh, honey?” she finally asked. It’s late, aren’t we going to – well – do it?”
“I can’t,” her spouse said. “It’s Lent.”
“It’s lent?!” she exclaimed. “That’s ridiculous! To who and for how long?”

What do you call a sleepy person on Ash Wednesday?

Recommended: Ash Wednesday Jokes

What did the pancake say to the syrup during Lent?
“I’m sorry, I gave up sweets for 40 days.”

During Lent, a devout parishioner wanders through heavy rain through hamburger huts and steak places into Mount Angel’s monastery and asks for shelter. He arrived just in time for dinner and received the finest fish and chips he’s ever tasted.
He walks into the kitchen after supper to thank the chefs. “Hi, my name is Brother Michael, and this is Brother Francis,” he is greeted by two brothers.
“I’m delighted to meet you. I just wanted to say thank you for a delicious dinner. I had the finest fish and chips I’d ever had. Who cooked what, just out of curiosity?”
Brother Michael replies, “Well, I’m the fish friar.”
The man turns to the other brother and says, “Then you must be . . .”
“Yes, I’m afraid I’m the chip monk.”

What’s the only meat a priest can eat during Lent?

Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
(Easter who?)
Easter you glad Lent only lasts 40 days?

What do you call a Lenten joke?
A sacrilol.

What do you call a Lenten pizza?

Why did the athlete give up running for Lent?
He wanted to walk with Jesus.

Recommended: Jesus Jokes

What did the priest say to the bear who gave up honey for Lent?
“Bear with me, it’s only 40 days.”

Why are some thanking God that lent is over?
Not using condoms was definitely getting nerve-wracking.

What is the difference between Lent and NNN?
None, Lent is just No Nut November for Catholic Priests.

Do you have a lent joke? Post your own lent puns in the comment section below!

What do you think?

Written by Jessica Amlee

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Known for her sharp wit and clever wordplay, Jessica has authored several popular joke books. A regular at stand-up comedy clubs, she never fails to leave her audience in stitches. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    One Comment