70 Funny White People Jokes You Cannot Tell A Caucasian

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Jessica Amlee


White people, just like any other racial or ethnic group, have certain stereotypes associated with them that have become fodder for humor. These stereotypes can include everything from cultural peculiarities to perceived social attitudes. While it’s essential to remember that stereotypes do not define an individual’s behavior or attitudes, they often serve as a basis for social commentary and humor to highlight common experiences or societal constructs.

As we delve into white people jokes, it’s critical to note that these should always be in good taste, not aiming to belittle or offend. Humor can be subjective, and what’s funny to some might not be to others. It’s essential to approach these jokes with respect and understanding for all individuals involved, avoiding perpetuating harmful stereotypes or offending anyone.

Dark White People Jokes

Why can’t white people can’t say the N word?
They invented it after all.

Why do Americans suck at calculus?
White people have never been good at integration.

Why do Native Americans hate April?
Because April showers bring May Flowers, and Mayflowers bring white people.

Yo mama so white, she thinks Doritos are Mexican food.

Did you know that the only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis who played Gollum?
They’re the Tolkien white guys.

What do you call a neat Caucasian?
Tidy whitey.

What do you call a bench full of white people?
The NBA.

Why do Indians hate snow?
Because it’s white and settles on their land.

Everybody knows there are words only bl*ck people can say, but what can only white people say?
“Thanks for the warning, officer.”

Why do white people own so many pets?
Because we’re not allowed to own people anymore.

What do white people make for dinner?

What classic rock band do only white people like?
The Police.

Yo mama so white, when she sweats, the drops wear snow gear.

Why are white prison gangs the scariest?
Because they had a fair trial and still ended up in prison.

Which group of white people has the biggest d*cks?
Hungarians (Hung aryans).

Why do Native Americans hate when white people ask to use their WiFi?
They’re taking all their LAN!

What do you call 64 white people in a room?
One full blooded Cherokee.

A bl*ck man and a white man walk into a bakery. The bl*ck man immediately steals three pastries and puts them in his pocket.
He says to the white, “See how good I am? The owner didn’t see a thing.” The white man says to the bl*ck man, “That’s typical of you bl*ck people. I am going to show you an honest way to get the same result.”
He goes to the owner of the bakery and says, “Give me a pastry and I will show you a magic trick.” Intrigued, the owner accepts and gives him a pastry. The white man swallows it and asks for another one. The owner gives him another one. Then the white man swallows that one and asks for a third pastry and eats that, too.
The owner starts to wonder where the magic trick is and asks, “So what did you do with the pastries?”
The white man replies, “Look in the bl*ck man’s back pocket…..”

What do a racist joke and crossing the street have in common?
White people looking both ways before they start.

Recommended: Racist Jokes

Why Racist jokes are like white people?
Because they are the best.

What do you call a bunch of White people chasing a bl*ck guy through a field?
The PGA.

Yo mama so white, she plays hide and seek in a blizzard.

What do you call a White girl with a yeast infection?
Crackers with Cheese.

What do you call it when a white guy tries to shoot a 3 pointer?

Why do white people hate diversity?
Variety is the spice of life.

What do you call a sassy Caucasian prophet?
A wise cracker.

How many white people does it take to replace a light bulb?
One to hold the bulb, and the rest to screw the whole world.

What do you call a party with no white people?

Yo mama so white, she calls the cops on herself when she gets a suntan.

How many white people can you fit in a can?
Crackers don’t come in cans, they come in boxes.

Why do white people not like playing uno with Mexicans?
They take all the green cards.

Recommended: Mexican Jokes

What do you call a Mexican white nationalist group?
The QueQueQue.

Why shouldn’t white people swim?
Crackers get soggy when wet.

A black knight moves into a new village with only white people.
After a year, a white girl in the village gives birth to a bl*ck child. A shepherd goes up to the knight and says, “I think you had sex with that girl since you’re the only bl*ck person in this entire village.”
The knight responds, “Well, sometimes weird things just happen, like your single white sheep among your herd of black sheep.” The shepherd says, “Hey! You say nothing bout the sheep, I say nothing bout the baby.”

What do you call a bunch of white people running down a hill?
An avalanche.

What do a racist joke and crossing the street have in common?
White people look both ways before they start.

Yo mama so white, she hides in flour.

Why are there more white gay people than any other race?
Because white light splits into rainbow colors.

Do you know how racist and homophobic America is?
That people even want their teeth to be straight and white.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 bl*ck guys?
The Quarterback.

If Matthew McConaughey was a white supremacist, what would his catchphrase be?
‘Kay ‘Kay ‘Kay.

Whatrestraunt is always full of white people?
Cracker Barrel.

Yo mama so white, she spilled White Out on herself and disappeared.

Why can’t Chinese people have white babies?
Because two Wongs don’t make a white.

Recommended: Dark Chinese Jokes

A 5-year-old African American wanted to see what it was like to be white so he covered himself in flour.
He went up to his mother and said, “Look mama I’m a white boy now!” She punches him in the face and he then goes to his father and says, “Look pops I’m a white boy now!” His father takes off his belt and beats him with it. Finally, he goes to his grandma and says, “Grandma, I’m a white boy now!” Again, she slaps him across the face and asks the boy, “How does it feel to be white now?”
He replies, “I’ve been white for 5 minutes and I already hate bl*ck people.”

Why aren’t there riots when White People get killed?
Because white people have work in the morning.

Why do white girls always travel in odd numbers?
Because they “Literally. Can’t. Even.”

What do you call a white crow?
A caw-casian.

Yo mama so white, she played Olaf’s acting double.

What resolution do white supremacists prefer?

What do you call a person who likes white rice, and not brown rice?
A ricest.

What do you call a crazy white person?
A nutcracker.

What do you call a basic white girl that is unattractive?

What do you call Caucasian grandmothers?
Graham crackers.

Yo mama so white, when she made a snow angel, she was declared missing.

What do you call a Caucasian person being run over by a steamroller?
A Flat White.

What do people and sharks have in common?
All the great ones are white.

What do you call an angry white person?
Salty Cracker.

Why White male privilege is like god?
Only real if you believe in it.

Why Batman covers only half of his face?
To let the cops know he’s white.

Yo mama so white, her blood type is milk.

How many white people does it take to change a lightbulb?
They don’t, they’re too busy smoking meth out of them.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 30 bl*ck guys?

Do you know that white people don’t shoot each other in the streets like bl*ck people do?
They do it in schools because they have class.

Do you have a funny White People joke? Write down your own White People puns in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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