Dark humor is a type of humor that makes light of serious or taboo subjects, often in a sarcastic or satirical way. It typically involves irony, black comedy, or sarcasm. It is used to challenge societal norms and expectations or to comment on sensitive or controversial issues such as death, suffering, or tragedy. Dark humor can be used to cope with difficult or painful situations, or simply to shock or entertain, but it is not for everyone and can sometimes be misinterpreted or offensive.
Dark humor is like food, not everyone gets it. These jokes are popular because they can be a way to test one’s own boundaries and push the limits of what is considered acceptable to joke about. Additionally, dark humor often requires a higher level of intelligence and cleverness to understand, making it appealing to specific audiences. People who enjoy dark humor often have a unique sense of humor and find the unconventional approach refreshing. After all, dark humor is like babies with AIDS, they never get old. Discover the funny dark humor jokes (with no limits) that will have you in stitches. Read now!
Best Dark Humor Jokes
What’s the best part about having Alzheimer’s?
You get to laugh at all the repeated dark humor jokes on the Internet every time.
Why is Putin still invading Ukraine?
Once he Putin, He don’t pull out.
Why is dark spelled with a ‘k’ and not a ‘c’?
You can’t see in the dark.
What do you call intelligent people in the U.S.?
Tourists.
How is a religion like a p#nis?
It’s fine to have one, it’s fine not to have one. The problems start when you start shoving it down children’s throats.
Do you know that if you tell a girl she’s beautiful once, she won’t believe you, but if you tell the same girl that she’s fat once, she’ll always remember it?
That’s because elephants never forget.
Why do adults never understand school shooting jokes?
Guess they’re aimed at a younger audience.
Knock, knock.
(Whose there?)
Your dad.
(But my dads dead.)
I know, just reminding you!
Why is it inappropriate when guys say their girlfriends are their “Partners in Crime”?
Like we get it bro she’s underage.
Do you know the best thing about killing a hooker?
Not only do you get your money back, but, the second hour is free.
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
How is gender similar to the twin towers?
There used to be two of them, and now it is a sensitive subject.
Recommended: Dark Humor Knock Knock Jokes
Where does a suicide bomber go when he dies?
Everywhere.
What’s the difference between a cop and a bullet?
When a bullet kills somebody you know its been fired.
Why does the theory “Commit suicide and might get 72 virgins” of Islamic terrorists make no sense?
Become a Catholic priest and get them now!
What do you call a white person set on fire?
A firecracker.
Two men and one woman were interviewed for the position of assassin.
The first man was handed a gun and instructed to enter a room and shoot the individual seated in a chair. He went in and then straight out. “That’s my wife,” he explained, “and I can’t murder her.”
“We’re sorry,” the interviewers continued, “but you don’t have what it takes to be an assassin.”
The same task was given to the second man. He remained in the room for a full minute before exiting, shaking his head. “That’s my wife,” he explained, “and I couldn’t bring myself to shoot.”
“We’re sorry,” the interviewers continued, “but you also don’t have what it takes to be an assassin.”
Finally, the woman entered. She remained in the room for five minutes, during which time there was a loud ruckus from within. She finally emerged, out of breath and looking a little roughed up. “You might have mentioned my spouse was in there,” she panted. “And the stupid gun you gave me turned out to be full of blanks, so I had to beat him to death with the chair!”
What do Pikachu and 6 million Jews have in common?
They’re both Ashes.
How do Americans learn the metric system?
9mm at a time. problem is sometimes it goes straight through their heads.
How do you surprise a blind guy?
You leave the plunger in the toilet.
Recommended: Blind Jokes
Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
They don’t want to be mistaken for a feminist.
What starts with an M and ends with arriage?
Miscarriage.
Why didn’t Anne Frank just finish her diary?
Concentration problems.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Not Sally.
What do you call an IT technician that touches children?
A PDF file!
What do you mean by reverse exorcism?
When the devil tells the priest to exit the child’s body.
How are buying a hooker and a subway sandwich similar?
Both could’ve been avoided if your wife would’ve just done her god damn job.
Why can’t girls in the middle east smoke weed?
Cuz they’ll get stoned.
A young cowboy entered a seedy cafe in a small West Texas town.
He sat at the counter and spotted an elderly cowboy with his arms folded and his gaze fixed on a bowl of chili. After roughly 15 minutes of staring at it, the young cowboy boldly inquired, “If you’re not going to eat it, do you mind if I do?” Slowly turning his head toward the young wrangler, the older cowboy muttered, in his best cowboy voice, “Nah. Go ahead.”
The young cowboy eagerly reached over and slid the bowl over to his spot, spooning it in with glee. He was almost to the bottom when he noticed a rotten dead rat in the chili.
The sight was shocking and he immediately upchucked the chili into the bowl. The old cowboy quietly said, “Yep, that’s as far as I got, too…”
Why is the Rubik’s cube record holder always American?
Cause Americans are really good at separating colors.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his a#s.
Recommended: Cannibal Jokes
What’s the worst thing to feel during a prostate exam?
Two hands on your shoulders.
What do you get when you mix human DNA with pony DNA?
You get banned from the petting zoo. That’s what you get.
What’s the difference between an American and a computer?
An American doesn’t have troubleshooting.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Little boy blue.
(Little boy blue who?)
Michael Jackson.
Why does a queen have more mobility than the king in chess?
Because the board looks like a kitchen floor.
What’s better than winning gold at the Paralympics?
Walking.
What’s worse than George Bush doing 9/11?
Jeffrey Epstein doing nine Elevens.
What’s worse than locking your keys in your car in front of an abortion clinic?
Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.
How do you blind an Asi*n?
Put a windshield in front of them.
A woman goes to the doctor with abdominal pain. The doctor runs a couple of tests and advises her to come back in a couple of weeks for the results.
“Grab a seat’ the doctor says on her return. “Looking at the results in 9 months’ time you’ll be sitting at home changing nappies.”
“Am I pregnant?” the woman asks.
“No,” the doctor replies, “you have bowel cancer.”
Why do Chinese people like playing Among Us?
It’s the only place they can vote!
Recommended: Chinese Jokes
Why do you think China should have a baseball team?
They can destroy the entire world with a single bat.
What would be the first thing you’d do if you woke up as a girl?
Dishes.
What’s the difference between Anne Frank and Harry Potter?
Only one came out the chamber.
Knock, knock.
(Whose there?)
Bill Cosby.
(Bill Cosby who?)
Never mind, I’ll come back when you’re sleeping.
What’s the difference between Princess Diana and 39 cents?
39 cents is much easier to scrape together in the back of a Mercedes.
Did you know that most women are left-handed?
That’s because the majority of them don’t know what to do with rights!
What kind of pizza did the twin towers order?
Two large plains.
Why do Americans rarely tell jokes about mass shootings?
Because it’s always too soon.
What do you call a gay person on fire?
LGBBQ.
Recommended: Gay Jokes
Why do you never see gay people in wheelchairs?
You can’t be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
What do you call a gay French man?
A faguette!
A kid asks his mom what dark humor is.
She says, “You see that man with no arms, tell him to clap.”
“But mom I’m blind!” says the kid.
“Exactly,” replied the mom.
Why should you fear white people in prison instead of the blacks?
Because you know that whites are in for actually committing something.
What do Christians and gays have in common?
They both say, “Oh God” when they get on their knees.
Do you know the phrase “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure?”
Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted.
What’s the difference between a gun and some gum?
You pull one in class and everyone is your best friend.
What do men have in their pants that’s only 3 inches long, but can fully satisfy a woman?
Their credit card.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Roger.
(Roger who?)
Roger walks away, silently sobbing, having realized his mother’s Alzheimer’s is getting worse!
Why does Mexico never win the Olympics?
Because anyone who knows how to run, jump and swim is already in the US.
Recommended: Mexican Jokes
What is a Mexican’s favorite sport?
Cross country.
How do you pick up an 18th-century Hindu widow?
With a broom and dustpan.
How do you turn any salad into a Caesar salad?
Stab it 23 times.
A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini.
The bartender thinks this is a bit strange, then realizes he is actually dreaming. He wakes up and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he just had. But his wife just ignores him.
The man turns and begins to sob as he realizes his marriage is in shambles.
What’s the difference between Usain bolt and Hitler?
Usain bolt can finish a race.
What was Morgan Freeman called before the civil war?
Morgan.
Do you want to know why p*rn is unrealistic?
It shows women saying, “Yes,” and having a good time!
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
9/11.
(9/11 who?)
[pause] You said you’d never forget.
Do you know what near-sighted gynecologists and puppies have in common?
A wet nose.
Why don’t fat girls get dates?
They’re harder to pick up.
Recommended: Fat People Jokes
Why are there no fat people in Japan?
Last time they had a Fat Man 80,000 people died.
Why did the slave go to college?
To get his master’s degree.
Why do amputees consistently get severe depression?
Because they couldn’t reach out to someone.
What is Africa’s national sport?
The Hunger Games.
A woman is checking out at the grocery store.
She puts bananas, coffee, soy milk, oatmeal, and hairspray on the conveyor belt. The cashier smiles at her and says, “I can tell you’re single.”
“Oh, ha, how did you know?” the woman asks, blushing.
“Because you’re f*cking ugly.”
Why are abortion jokes rare?
They’re hard to deliver.
What do you call a rock band made of special ed kids?
Syndrome Of A Down.
What is the similarity between Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
What’s the difference between president and coffee?
Some people actually like their coffee black.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Doesn’t matter what you call him he’s not coming.
Recommended: No Arms No Legs Jokes
What does 36+16 equal to?
A prison sentence.
What do you call a ret*rd who’s in the army?
Special forces.
What kind of person cannot learn from their mistakes?
A bomb defuser.
What looks British but isn’t British?
Everything in the British museum.
What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
A quarter-pounder with cheese.
How do you make the world’s greatest Harlem Shake?
Throw a flashbang into a room full of epileptics.
What’s the difference between my father and acne?
Acne waited for me to be a teenager before coming on my face.
What does a cop say when they shoot ginger?
Orange is the new black.
Recommended: Ginger Jokes
How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man?
None.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Why can’t you fool an aborted fetus?
It wasn’t born yesterday.
How do you get a Jewish girl’s number?
Roll up her sleeve!
What’s black and sits at the top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking after a house fire.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
Cause she wasn’t wearing a seatbelt.
What’s Al Qaeda’s favorite football team?
New York Jets.
What do you call a flat-chested emo girl?
A cutting board.
Recommended: Emo Jokes
Why is suicide illegal?
Because it destroys government property.
Why did the child cross the road?
Because he didn’t wear a seatbelt.
A man and a young boy are walking into a forest at night.
The boy says, “I’m scared.”
The man says, “You’re scared? I have to walk out of here alone.”
Why do Arabs hate chess?
Because the queen is allowed to move freely.
What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white?
Alive.
What do you call a serial killer in a maternity ward?
Spawn camper.
What was the main cause of Jewish migration in WW2?
The wind.
Helen Keller walks into a bar.
Then a table, then a chair.
Recommended: Helen Keller Jokes
What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
When does a pentagon not have 5 sides?
When it’s intersected by a plane.
What would the world be like without women?
A pain in the a#s.
Why camel is called the ship of the desert?
Because it’s filled with arab s*men.
What do an Apple and an Emo have in common?
They hang from trees.
What did Cinderella do when she arrived at the ball?
She gagged.
Why they don’t allow photographers in church on Sunday?
To prevent mass shooting.
Why do orphans play GTA?
To be wanted.
Recommended: Orphan Jokes
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball?
Because no one misses them.
What did the helicopter say to the mountain?
“Kobe.”
Why killing black people is a lot like saying the N-word?
They do it all the time but get real mad when a white person does it.
The list above includes dead baby jokes, orphan jokes, dark dad jokes, WW2 jokes, dads leaving jokes, and emo jokes which are all forms of morbid humor that can be seen as controversial or insensitive by some. Have a better dark humor joke? Post your own dark jokes in the comment section below!
I am trying to convince my dad to get a new hearing aid But he just won’t listen.
‘One man’s trash is another man’s treasure’. Horrible way to find out you were adopted.
One teacher is teaching at a school. He says “If you have 3 dollars and your parents give you 2 dollars, how many dollars do you have?”
Nobody answers, until a little girl says “3 dollars.”
The teachers says, “No you idiot.”
He continues saying the example unntil the same little girls burst into tears and goes out of the room.
Later, the teacher is in the staff room and says to his colleague “What’s wrong with those kids? They simply can’t answer 3 plus 5!”
The colleague says “What example did you use?”
The teachers repeats the example and his colleague exclaims, ” You idiot!! This is an orphanage!”